


The Most Beautiful Woman in the World

by PataHikari



Category: Ranma 1/2
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-08-15
Updated: 2017-08-28
Packaged: 2018-02-13 07:50:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 42,666
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2142963
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PataHikari/pseuds/PataHikari
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There's nothing more that Ranma would like then to be rid of the Junsenkyo curse he's saddled with. Fortunately, he's learned of a cure. All he has to do is get a kiss from a girl named Akane Tendo. Spoken of by the magic as "The Most Beautiful Woman in the World"...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Boys and Girls

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A boy gets cursed and a girl gets a boyfriend. Personally I think the boy got the better deal.

Today was not exactly the best day in Ranma's life. No, in fact if you were to ask Ranma what the worst possible day in Ranma's life would be, this day would rank up there.

Both his parents were in the small hut, staring straight at him, completely mortified. With a groan Ranma looked down at himself to avoid their gaze.

Rather, Ranma looked down at herself.

"What has happened to my son!" Nodoka her mother shouted at the chinese man heating a kettle.

The man, who was a guide to this wretched place Ranma's father had dragged his family to, sighed. "I tried to warn guests! Those springs are cursed!"

Nodoka's mouth snapped shut, she glanced over at her husband. "Genma, dear, why didn't you say anything about a curse?"

As much as Genma could bluster, the withering stare of his wife reduced him to whimpering shell of a man. "Dear… the pamphlet didn't mention any curses…" He held up the pamphlet and Nodoka snatched it out of his hands.

Nodoka looked over the small booklet, her expression becoming more and more dour. "Husband?"

"Yes…?

"You can not read Chinese, correct?"

"Err, that's right." Genma said.

"Then why, Genma…" Nodoka growled, "Did you use a pamphlet **written in chinese** as your guide!" She screamed, before beating her husband over the head with the Saotome Family Blade.

Thankfully she kept the sheathe on.

* * *

No. It was not a good day for Ranma at all. Here she was, following her parents to their next destination, for more training and hopefully... a cure.

Yes, a cure to this annoying curse. Ranma could not believe Genma! She knew her father could make some hair brained choices occasionally, but this was by far the dumbest! He had ignorantly dragged his family to a horrible cursed training ground, and then within five minutes had gotten his son cursed!

Niángnìquán, the "Spring of Drowned Girl." It was a "very tragic story" of some girl who drowned in the spring years ago. And now, whenever Ranma was hit with cold water, he was forced into another form. That of a girl. Either the form of the girl who had drowned, or what she herself would look like if she had been born female. Judging by how she still resembled her mother, Ranma figured it was the second.

Nǚjiézú, the "Tribe of Women Heroes." A village near Junsenkyo that had long isolated itself (sort of). Filled with powerful martial arts and mystic secrets, it had actually been Genma's next planned destination after the mystical training ground. But once the guide had mentioned that nobody knew more about the secrets of the springs then that (semi)reclusive tribe, Ranma had insisted they head there right away. So, with Nodoka now in charge of the map (She could read some Chinese), the Saotome family headed off to the mysterious village.

"Well, this looks like a lovely place." Nodoka said as they entered the town. There were cobblestone roads, children running around playing, and lots of people milling around. They could see a few girls doing what looked like some forms with boys watching and cheering.

"Leave this up to me." Genma stepped forward, approaching one of the villagers. "Excuse me, ma'am? I was wondering, me and my family just came back from Junsenkyo and-"

At the mention of the word "Jusenkyo" a sudden silence came over the village, as every pair of eyes stared at Genma.

* * *

Akane didn't know if this was the best day of her life, but it was ranking pretty high up there. She had been a student at Furinkan for a month thus far, and everything had been going great. She was doing well in classes, and had suddenly found herself quite popular.

The time between middle school and high school had lead Akane to blossom from an awkward teenage girl into a lovely young woman. And quite a young woman she was, she was not a slender frail waif. She had a strength in her stride and movements that came from years of practicing her family's school of Martial Arts. She had quickly grown popular among both girls and boys. The various martial arts clubs didn't even resent her not joining any! After all she had duties at home as the heir to her family's dojo.

Still, that didn't mean she didn't occasionally go help up some of the clubs if they asked. Like she was now doing, showing some of the Judo Club members how to do a tricky throw. Tossing the various members to demonstrate it, even several boys much bigger than her were easily thrown off.

She noticed that there was someone watching her who she didn't recognize as a member of the club. He had been leaning against the wall, watching her. His eyes met hers, and she was suddenly staring at him. Her mind searched for a name to match the face, "Ah…" Tatewaki Kuno, he was in the year ahead of her. The captain of the Kendo Club, Akane wondered what was he doing here. Was he here to ask for some help?

When Tatewaki noticed that Akane was looking at him, he stood straight and began walking towards her. Akane noticed that the judo club scattered away from her. Some girls giggling as he approached her. "Good afternoon Upperclassman."

"Akane Tendo." Tatewaki gave her a smile, "Its a pleasure to finally make your acquaintance."

Akane felt her face heat up a little, that smile was a new one. Quite a few boys had been looking at her and some of them had even tried to talk to her. Yet there was something about the way he was approaching her that made her feel a bit strange. He was definitely interested in her, was he going to ask her out? Give her flowers? The romantic in her went into overdrive. "W-what do you need, Upperclassman?" She gave him her best smile.

"Since you joined our fair school, Ms. Tendo, I have been admiring your ability. Your strength and skill is beyond compare, I doubt any in this school can match you." He looked off into the distance, "Truly your power will carry you to the halls of legend."

"Oh, you don't have to be like that Upperclassman." Akane said with a blush, "You can just call me Akane…"

"Then you may call me by my given name." Tatewaki said, smiling confidently. "I wish to test my skills against yours, to see if I can stand against you."

Well this was a new way of flirting, and yet it felt exciting to Akane. Her smile grew broad, "Well then, Tatewaki, let's do a bit of sparring…" An idea came to her, "Oh, I know… how about a little wager? If you win, I'll let you take me out on a date."

Tatewaki's smile grew broader, "And if you are victorious then, I shall permit you to date me."

* * *

The three Saotomes were shuffled into a small house off in the corner of the village. A girl about Ranma's age was gawking at them as the one of the men who had lead them there was talking rapidly to an old woman in some dialect of Chinese that Ranma didn't recognize. (Genma, oddly enough, did. It was Shaozhou Tuhua. Why Genma knew Tuhua and not other more mainstream dialects of Chinese is a story for another day.) She sized up the family, approaching them as the rest of the villagers left.

"You may call me Cologne." The old woman said, glancing at the three. " And yes, I know what my name sounds like. The gods have a sense of humor in that sense. I am a teacher here in this village." She grinned, "I guess you could also call me a shaman or something like that. If there's trouble with magic or some other trickery, I'm the one you want."

"We're honored to be guests here." Nodoka said politely, being the one member of the family with social graces.

"No problem at all Madam." Cologne said, "So, tell me, which one of you three is an unfortunate victim of the Cursed Springs?"

A moment of uncomfortable silence followed, before Ranma lifted up her hand.

"Ah. I see." Cologne nodded, "So tell me, young lady, which spring did you fall into?"

Ranma blushed, taking a deep breath, she gathered her courage before speaking. "The… the Spring of Drowned Girl."

Cologne stared at Ranma, looking her over for a minute. "I see. So… young man then?"

Ranma nodded.

Cologne burst out laughing.

"Hey. This is serious! My son's a daughter now!" Genma said.

Cologne finished cackling, "Forgive me. But it is amusing, a bit. And truly, there are many worse curses you could have young man. Imagine if you had fallen into the Spring of Drowned Piglet? Or the Spring of Drowned Frog? Or the Spring of Drowned Fish? Yes. A fish did drown there. Magic, don't ask."

Ranma's eyes widened in horror, before nodding. "I guess it could be worse… still sucks though."

"It's karma, my boy." Cologne said, and noticing the three's confused expression continued. "Life will forever throw curveballs at us. Things happen by chance and luck. You gain good karma by taking fate's twists and turning it into something better. You gain bad karma by letting it hurt you or tear you down." She pulled out a pipe from somewhere, beginning to smoke from it. "Still, I'm guessing your current goal is a cure, correct?"

Ranma nodded, "I don't wanna be a girl. Err, no offence to you guys. I guess you're like, Amazons or something, girls aren't bad but-"

Cologne cut her off with a laugh. "I'm not offended boy."

"So, is there a cure?" Genma said.

Cologne took a long puff from her pipe. "I must confess something. The reason you were taken to me is because a week ago I informed the village that when a woman, her seeming daughter, and a man came to speak of Jusenkyo that they should be brought to me." She paused, letting the surprise sink in. "I have many talents, and one of those is a gift for prophecy. Now, let me tell you seeing the future is not like what you may have seen on TV. The future is not fixed, and is constantly changed by the actions of mankind and chance. What I see is how to make a future that is desirable to me. I can see what I need to do to get the result I want."

"Soo.. what?" Ranma asked.

"The three of you shall live here, work here, for the next two years. You will be part of the community. I shall train your son in Martial Arts and you," she pointed to Genma, "Shall train my great-granddaughter. In return, I shall help you by finding a way so that your curse troubles you no more." She took one last puff of her pipe, "So tell me, Saotome Family." Their eyes widened, for they had not spoken of their names to anybody in the village, "Do we have a deal?""

* * *

Ranma had to admit, the two following years had been fun.

After some talk, Genma and Nodoka had agreed to Cologne's terms. Ranma went along with it. It's not like they had any other leads. He had trained under Cologne, eventually becoming friends with her granddaughter Shampoo and that odd nearsighted suitor Mousse. He had learned a lot of crazy techniques and his martial arts skills and jumped up leaps and bounds since that day. And the **fights!** Ranma had fought, and defeated, some truly impressive and dangerous opponents. The twelve year long "Training journey" was finally coming to an end though. Genma and Nodoka had both expressed interest in returning home once Ranma found his cure. Apparently stable village life had finally made them homesick enough.

Still, that was for later, right now Cologne had dragged him out into a shed with nothing but a single fire pit in the center.

"So, Ranma." Cologne said, "It's been two years."

"Yup. Been pretty fun Granny."

"Which means it's time to fulfill my terms of our deal."

"You have the cure!" Ranma said, his voice getting an excited edge.

"I don't have it. These curses are given for a reason, it's all Karma my boy." Cologne ignored him rolling his eyes, "What I do have, however, is a way to foresee how you can solve the problem on your own."

"Oh. So you'll see where my cure is and I'll go get it?"

"Something like that." Cologne said, lighting the fire pit up with some trick. In a few short moments there was a large blaze cheerfully crackling. "The fire will allow me to show you the necessary information of my prophecy. You should see an image pertaining to it once it's ready."

"Oh. Like that fire in Sailor Moon." Ranma said.

Cologne gave him a strange look.

"What?" Ranma protested, "Shampoo only orders Shoujo manga. Come on."

"Kids these days." Cologne said with a shake of her head. "Anyways. Focus on the fire. Eventually images should form in it."

"So, like, I don't need to take or smoke anything? I thought those were needed for these sorts of things."

Cologne rolled her eyes, "No Ranma. I'm not trying to get you high. I'm showing you a real vision, no mind altering drugs needed."

"OK. Got it. Just focus on the fire." Ranma gazed into the flame, watching it burn and flare. He stared at it, stared at it, and stared at it some more. Meanwhile Cologne had sat on the opposite side of the fire, entering some kind of meditative state.

One might think that one would get bored, but this was Ranma Saotome. He had learned the "Chestnuts Roasting Over an Open Fire" speed technique while under the influence of the Full Body Cat Tongue! He could easily develop a laser like focus on something. And if staring at this fire would help him get cured then he would stare at it all day!

Fortunately, it didn't take that long. After around five minutes, an image started to appear in the flame. It wasn't even a vague flickering of the fire that reminded him of something. It was like somebody had projected an image directly onto it! It was a young woman, about his age from the looks of it. Short dark hair, wearing a yellow gi. She was performing a martial arts form, smiling as her limbs snapped through the movements. She was quite fast and skilled from what Ranma could discern. "I see someone…" He said.

"Good. You see the girl?"

"Yeah." Ranma said. "Who is she?"

"I do not know her name." Cologne said, "However, I can now see what you must do Ranma Saotome. In order for your curse to trouble you no longer you must travel to your mother and fathers birthplace. Once there you must receive a kiss, willingly given unprompted, from her-"

**The Most Beautiful Woman in the World.**

**Part 1: Boys and Girls**

Akane got of the train, doing her best not to look excited as she wandered down to the college's campus. She knew his schedule, he was off classes now.

Oh was he going to be surprised to see her! Their two year anniversary had popped up just last week, and it had been quite an occasion. She smiled as she remembered the date they had enjoyed. But she wanted to spend more time with him, ever since he had left school they hadn't seen each other near as much as they were used to. Sure, he often talked about how he missed her, but that just encouraged her more!

She brushed adjusted her dress, and checked to see if her hair was still in place after the train ride, and headed down to check if maybe he was at one of the small cafes on campus catering to students.

Akane couldn't wait to finish High School and come here herself.

"Hmm?" Something caught her eye, "Ah!" There he was! He was at one of those little cafes. He was sitting at one of the outdoor tables. She ran over to him, her smile growing. "Hey! Tatewaki!" She called out… before suddenly stopping. Akane's eyes took in what she saw. Everything that was there.

And she screamed.

* * *

"It feels nice to be in our homeland again, I will admit." Nodoka said.

Once Cologne had delivered her prophecy, the Saotomes had started the process of moving back to Japan. It had taken about a month to pack up, say good-bye to the friends they had made (which had ended up being a big going away party by the end), and get back to Japan.

To Ranma's great surprise, his family actually owned a home in Nerima, the "birthplace" of his parents. It was an old and dusty house by now. The first week had been spent getting the building suitable for human habitation. Once the cleaning and setting of furniture was done, they finally had a chance to settle in and talk about their new goal.

"You know, I still have to wonder if that old bat is pulling our leg." Genma said, "A kiss, really?"

"It's rather romantic, wouldn't you think dear?" Nodoka said, "A kiss to break the curse! It's an old fairy tale!" She let out a fluttering sigh, "My dear manly son, finding true love and freeing himself with a kiss!"

Genma snorted, "Come on now. All he has to do is find the girl, kiss her, and the curse is gone!"

"Err, I don't think that'll work Pop. Granny said that it has to be given 'willingly' and 'unprompted.'" Ranma said. "From the sounds of it, I have to get the chick to kiss me without telling her."

"See Genma! It has to be romantic… oh my son is going to be a prince sweeping a princess of her feet!" Nodoka swooned, blushing and giggling like a schoolgirl.

Genma decided it was time to ignore his wife until she stopped giggling. "So boy, any idea where this magic girl is? A name maybe?"

Ranma shook his head, "Just what she looks like Pop." Of course, he hadn't told his parents the title that this little magic quest had given her.

It was odd, while Ranma could easily see that she was attractive, he didn't think she could be described as "The Most Beautiful Woman in the World". She was more… cute. Yes, that was how he'd describe her. She was cute, a girl just barely becoming a woman. A tomboy who had taken on some feminine traits, but would never give up the fiery parts of her that had earned her the title.

So why had Colonge described her in such a fashion?

"Well, either way, I think it might be best to finish your last year of education." Genma said. Sure, Ranma had studied at the local school at Nǚjiézú, but there was still one year left of high school. "Got to get a good college for a teaching degree if you want to follow in your old mans footsteps!" With a laugh Genma slapped Ranma on the back.

Ranma muttered something about foolish old men.

"Oh yes. I agree with Genma." Nodoka snapped out of her romantic reverie. "No son of mine isn't going to get a good degree."

"Of course Mom." Ranma said with a groan. He never had been able to say "No" to Nodoka. In the years the Saotomes had been wanderers, she had been a constant presence in his life. She kept Genma in check, and it was clear which of his parents he respected more. If Nodoka said education was important, then it was.

"I'll look around to see if there are any schools nearby that are good." Nodoka said, patting her son on the shoulder. "You should study for the entrance exam."

Ranma sighed, "Yes Mom."

* * *

A koi leapt out of the pond, landing again with a quiet splash. A bird sang a lovely melody. The sun was shining brightly, a cool breeze wafted through the air. The few clouds in the sky were pure white and fluffy. Indeed, it could easily be said to be a perfect day at the Tendo household.

Soun Tendo was sitting on the quietly, his gaze out into the yard, watching the fish. He was enjoying this lovely, peaceful day. The past two years had lead him to relish these quiet moments. Ever since his youngest daughter, Akane, had started high school her life had been a whirlwind of adventure. Martial artists looking for challenges, monsters and ghosts coming out the woodwork. His old Master had been freed, and Akane had impressed him enough (beat him up hard enough for groping her and stealing her underwear) for him to take her own as a student! Her skill grew leaps and bounds as she became even Soun's superior in Anything Goes. But now, things were calming down. She had managed to seal the Master away once again (she used a lot more TNT then he had) and settled a lot of the old grudges and rivalries. Now, Akane was focused on finishing High School and getting into a good college. Which meant that Soun had been thinking about the future of his family.

More then anything else, Soun wanted his three daughters to be happy. They needed to have safe and secure futures. The eldest daughter, Kasumi, had married Tofu Ono, a family doctor. The two had been making eyes at each other for some time. So when the courtship finally happened things progressed at a swift pace. They now lived in Tofu's apartment, and Kasumi was now studying medicine herself. Nabiki was by far the most fiercely independant of his children. She was in college and would probably take the business world by storm. Soun knew that she would be fine.

That left Akane, his youngest daughter. The one who had inherited his love of Martial Arts, his passion, and his compassion. He knew that she would be the one to inherit the family dojo. She was set for a career and livelihood, which left the other half of a persons needs.

Once she had entered high school, she had started dating that Tatewaki boy. And Soun couldn't help but approve. He was not only extremely affectionate towards his daughter, but a perfect gentleman. He was not exactly an unskilled fighter, and his family was well off enough that Akane could spend her days running the dojo without a single thought about money. Tatewaki had recently begun making hints to Soun that he wanted to be a bit more then Akane's boyfriend. Akane seemed to be picking up those hints, and he could tell she approved. Yes, Soun had thought, his daughters would all soon be happy doing what they wanted. He could retire in peace, letting the younger generation take over.

" **Get out!"**

Indeed, it was what he _had_ thought.

Yesterday Akane had come home, her face ash white, and ran into her room. She had not come out since. A mere ten minutes before hearing that shout, Tatewaki had shown up. He had immediately ran up to Akane's room.

And now Akane was screaming.

With a loud thud Tatewaki was thrown down the stairs back to the first floor. Soun figured the boy was thrown because he had landed on his back. Also because Akane jumped down and landed next to him, delivering a powerful kick to his gut in the process, a moment later.

"A-Akane…" Tatewaki managed to gasp out, pulling himself off the ground. "Akane, my beloved-" he didn't get to finish that sentence because Akane hit him in the jaw with a powerful right hook. Tatewaki flew through the air, landing in a crumpled heap a short distance from Soun. He quickly stood back up. That boy could take a truly impressive amount of punishment.

"Don't you dare call me that you bastard!" Akane screamed, her face red with anger.

Tatewaki looked confused, "Akane… what inspired you to such rage? You know my love for you is an eternal beacon against the darkness-" He was interrupted by Akane charging forward and kicking him into the air. He flew into the wall surrounding the house, before falling into the koi pond.

Akane didn't say anything, she just picked up the table, holding it over her head. Glaring at the point and waiting for Tatewaki to come out. The sodden boy pulled himself out of the pond. He still looked so **confused.** Soun began to wonder if, perhaps, Akane had misinterpreted whatever had made her so angry. He could see that the thought had occurred to Akane as well. Her expression softened, she stared at her boyfriend with a desperate pleading look.

"Please… Tatewaki… tell me what that was about." She said, tears forming in her eyes, "Please tell me I misunderstood, that she's a cousin or a friend or something **anything!"**

"Oh… Ah! Mariko, is she what has your heart set aflame?" Tatewaki said, "My dear Akane, you have naught to fear. You are forever in my heart and mind, my dear."

"S-s-so you weren't…" Hope dawned on Akane's face.

"My heart overflows with love. You are the fierce tigress, mighty and powerful. You stand by my side, dear Mariko she stands behind. Her strength supporting me. I can't **not** have bo-" He didn't get to finish the sentence, because Akane had thrown the table at him.

"You… **you two-timing son of a bitch!"** Akane screamed, her voice going hoarse. "Get out! Get out!" She fell to her knees, the tears she had held back until now finally coming out. "Out… out… get out…"

Soun could not believe how utterly clueless Tatewaki looked, his mouth was hanging open. He stared at Akane in complete disbelief. Did… did he really not understand why Akane was angry? Why **he** was now feeling angry? Soun had long known that Tatewaki would never be the smartest man the in world, but this spoke of a level of cluelessness that shocked him. "Mr. Tendo… could you help me explain things? I think dear Akane has some misunderstandings…"

"Son…" Soun shook his head, "No, Mr. Kuno, I suggest you leave now."

Tatewaki balked at Soun's cold words, "Mr… Mr. Tendo?"

"Did you not hear me? Leave! My daughter wants nothing more to do with you. Get off my property before I call the police!" Soun shouted, standing up. He was about ready to throw the boy out himself.

It seems that the while the threat of further physical violence from the Tendos didn't work, but the embarrassment of the police taking him away did. Tatewaki nodded quickly, marching past them towards the front door. "I… I shall return once Akane has calmed down."

"I don't think that will happen any time soon." Soun said, watching to make sure the two-timer kept his word and left. Once he confirmed that their house was free of him, Soun knelt down next his sobbing daughter. "Akane…" He said, patting her on the back.

"W-why Daddy… I thought he… I thought… why?"

"I don't know." He said. "I just don't know."

His daughter grabbed him, pulling him into a crushing hug. She sobbed and wailed, her words incoherent. Soun simply returned his daughter's embrace, letting her cry it all out.

* * *

Why did Nerima have so much water in it?

Ranma had, by sheer luck, managed to avoid getting drenched on no less than four occasions just far. Not to mention the canal which was just filled with liquid ready to drain his manhood away. Still, even with such trials he knew he needed to scope out the town he was living in now. It was best to get the lay of the land down before his mother found a school to enroll him into, so he didn't have to awkwardly wander around town like a clueless new guy if he ever went on social outing.

At the very least, he was hoping to find a place with good ice cream.

It was early in the morning and he had seen several people in school uniforms walk past. He hadn't paid much attention to them. Though more than a few had gawked at him, walking casually on the fence separating the sidewalk from the canal. His eyes lazily glanced over the area, he had stumbled into a residential part of town. So no ice cream here. He was about to jump down from the fence when he spotting something that made him stumble and nearly fall off the fence.

Her steps were heavy, her expression dark. It was as if she was ready and eager to explode at the world. She pointedly ignored everything and everyone around her. She hadn't spared the boy clinging to the fence a glance. She marched towards what looked like a school in the distance, her bag held tightly to her side. Even with that frustration, anger, and misery evident in her every move Ranma couldn't help but gawk at her. Because it was **her.** The Most Beautiful Woman in the World.

He had found her.

Ranma jumped down from the fence. Trailing her from a short distance. For a moment he considered calling out to her. However, demeanor was not that of a person willing to talk. She was dressed in a school uniform, so obviously she was a high school student like himself. He supposed this answered the question of which high school he'd be going to. He followed her, the two approaching the school which Ranma now knew he'd be studying at.

The sounds of excited chatter filtered through the air. Growing steadily louder as Ranma and the young woman approached the school. Ranma wondered if there was some kind of school festival or sporting event going on. He jumped up onto a nearby streetlight to get a better look at the school grounds. Once he saw what was going on, his jaw dropped. "What the…?"

* * *

Akane froze at the gates to Furinkan High. Around fifty to sixty boys had gathered a short distance from the entrance. She recognized boys from sport clubs, martial arts clubs… and the poetry club? What on earth were they doing here?

Each any every boy in the group suddenly perked up once they had noticed her coming onto the school grounds. The boys took a step forward, no different then a group of trained soldiers.

"Um, what's going on?" Akane asked, her speech breaking the dam. The boys charged as one, their battle cries unconventional yet still loud.

"I love you Akane!"

"Please go out with me!"

"You like strong guys! I'll show you how strong I am!"

"Hit me my love!"

Akane couldn't find words. Her mouth opened and closed. What were these boys… why were they rushing at her, weapons drawn? Screaming declarations of love with it! Did they seriously think that beating her up would-

" _If you win, I'll let you take me out on a date."_

Those words, **her** words, came back to her. What had been a fond memory until just two days ago came back to her. What had been a bit of flirting with a boy she had thought was cute… had come back to every horny boy in the school as an excuse to beat on her now that she was "available." How could anybody be so stupid? She didn't want to date any guy who beat her up! It had been a roundabout way to ask him out! Didn't they get that?

A horrible clarity came over Akane Tendo. Tatewaki had often liked telling that story… she sometimes thought he treated it more seriously than she did. Had he…? Had he, and by extension the male population of Furinkan, actually thought that he had "earned" the date by beating her? "Earned" the right to be her boyfriend?

He had. They did.

And now they were coming for her.

They were no different. All men were the same. Slobbering violent brutes, ruled by their hormones and lusts. They thought they could **own** her. They had no respect for any woman as a person. Just as a pretty accessory to brag about snagging to their buddies. Her rage boiled in her, her fists clenched tightly. She looked up to face the charging horde, her eyes burning with righteous rage. She tossed her bookbag aside. She wouldn't need it for now.

"You… you…. **men…"** Akane snarled, taking a step forward. "You worthless pathetic wastes…." Wastes of life. If they didn't treat her as an individual, then she would not either. Nothing but stupid, hormonal training dummies. She would **break** them.

"I hate men… I hate men… **I HATE MEN!"** She screamed, her own warcry canceling out pathetic hormonal cries of the boys. She took another step, and the ground cracked under her foot. The air was burning with the heat of her rage. They reached her, and Akane swung out her fist. It met the first boy, and he flew out of the crowd, sailed through the air, and crashed through the window into his homeroom. The next boy wasn't so lucky, she raised her leg up and kicked him down, embedding him into the ground up to his neck. The boy didn't care, he had gotten to see Akane's panties! The next boy she picked up, throwing him like a bowling ball he knocked over a dozen more. With that she screamed incoherently, cursing Tatewaki and the rest of the male flew in all directions, desperately jumping over her. Screaming cries of love and requests for a date, they didn't let up. For a moment it looked like they might overwhelm her from sheer numbers. Then a member of the kendo club made the mistake of attacking her. With a growl she ripped the shinai from his hands before kicking him in the testicles. Weapon in hand, she gained the advantage of reach and was able to much more effectively brutalize the boys.

The pile of testosterone exploded with a scream, boys flying into the air thanks to Akane's efforts. By now her body was encased in a glowing red battle aura, her shout having thrown all the remaining "suitors" into the air. Clutching the shinai like a baseball bat, she swung it at the boys as they came down. With a cry of "Men!" each impact sent a male flying, those unlucky enough to not hit a wall flew off into the distant horizon. Finally, there was silence.

Akane took a few breaths, letting the adrenaline finally die down. How dare those idiots bring up such painful memories! She should have hit them with the shinal harder…

The shinai.

Akane stared at the weapon she had grabbed and used expertly. She had never been the best with any sword forms, but the past two years she had gotten much better with them. After all she had been practicing… with…

" **Arrrgghhh!"** Akane screamed at the memories, memories of that traitor! "Stupid… worthless… **men!"** She slammed the shinai down onto the head of the boy she had embedded into the ground earlier, shattering the shinai and knocking him unconscious. Going back to pick up her bag, she stomped into schol. Cracks forming with each step, she then also accidentally tore the door to the school off. She threw it away, entering without any care about anything but her own frustration.

And just outside the grounds, a young man on a streetlight had watched the entire thing, his jaw hanging low.

* * *

"Back already?" Genma asked. He had been lounging on the couch while Nodoka got lunch ready.

"Y-yeah." Ranma headed down to the kitchen to help his mother.

"Something happen?" Nodoka asked.

"Oh… yeah…" Ranma pulled out some vegetables and began chopping them. "I found her. The girl. That needs to kiss me."

"Good job boy!" Genma said, "So you got it right?"

"Uh, no?"

Genma got out of his chair, "Well why not boy?"

"Because I didn't want to die?" Ranma said. "When I saw her she was brutalizing more guys than I could count screaming about how she hated men. Would **you** talk to a girl doing that Pops? Let alone try to kiss her?"

"Maybe she just had a bad break up?" Genma said.

"She kicked a guy into the concrete Pops." Ranma said as he finished up the vegetable chopping.

"So, she knocked him down?" Nodoka asked.

"No Mom. She kicked him into the concrete. As in, he was buried." Ranma said, "Like that one time Mousse hugged Shampoo every time she sneezed."

"Oh dear." Nodoka was frowning. "And she said she hated men?"

Ranma nodded.

"Bad breakup. Really bad." Genma said.

Nodoka walked out of the kitchen, slapping Genma on the back of the head. "Please be serious Genma." Then Nodoka noticed that she had left the kitchen with her son in there. "Ranma! I was making lunch!"

Too late, "Oh don't worry Mom I got it." Ranma was already checking the rice cooker and pulling out pans.

Nodoka sighed, settling into the couch next to her snickering husband. "So… Ranma, do you have any plans for this?" She wanted a cure for her sons curse as much as the rest of the family.

"No idea Mom. Was planning to go to… Furinkan, I think that's the name of the school. How am I going to get her to kiss me though if she's like that?"

"Yes… the first part of any date is to get to know the girl… if her reaction to men is such violence…" Nodoka frowned. "How can you get to know her?"

"No idea Mom." Ranma said. "Maybe wait a while for her to calm down… if that happens…"

Nodoka noticed that Genma had a thoughtful look on his face. "Dear?"

"Oh… well… she's angry at men… right?" Genma's face split into a grin. It was a familar grin to the Saotome family. It meant that Genma had an Idea.

Ranma couldn't see his face, but could tell that the Idea had come to his father. "Pops… I don't know what you're thinking. But no. No. Let me repeat; Hell no."

"Genma, are you thinking of what I think you are?" Nodoka said incredulously. "Are you seriously suggesting…"

"Come now! When have I steered our family wrong?" Genma protested.

"Do you want the list Pop?" Ranma called out.

"If either of you have an idea that's better than mine I'll be glad to go along with it." Genma said.

Neither could find an answer.

* * *

"Stupid old man. Stupid. Stupid old man." Ranma muttered.

Passing the entrance exam hadn't been particularly difficult, Ranma was fairly bright when he pushed himself. With the cure for the curse dangling over his head there was no way he wouldn't pass it. So now he was a proud student of Furinkan High School. Of course, with Genma's plan in effect, his final year of high school had an "interesting" wrinkle.

Which was why he was currently walking to school as a she.

Wearing the school uniform, her hair tied up in a "cute" little ponytail. At least she had managed to get away without any makeup. How on earth did Genma have so many people in government positions owe him favors?

Genma's plan was simple to discribe. Get to know her as a girl. Once she had settled in, attempt to "introduce" her to Ranma. With the knowledge he had gained as a girl, sweep her off her feet and get the kiss and the cure. Simple, in theory.

In practice, Ranma wondered how long it would before everything exploded in her face. Still, it wasn't like she had any better plans.

With a long sigh, "Aiko Saotome" began her trek to her new school life.


	2. Making Friends

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranma meets Akane, and starts to learn about her.

It was another day at Furinkan. Another day in which the desperate young men were gathered and ready for The Fight.

The Fight had existed for a week now. The purpose of The Fight was simple.

Defeat Akane Tendo, to "earn the right to date her."

Akane, herself the single most popular and beloved girl in school, had been the girlfriend of the most popular boy in school Tatewaki Kuno. Even after he had graduated they had been quite steady. However, the foundations of the school had been shaken once the word had gotten out that Akane had broken up with him.

The most commonly accepted reason for the breakup was that Tatewaki had slacked off in his training, becoming weaker than Akane. Once this happened she dumped him for the crime of not being the strongest male in the district. This, of course, in no way applied to reality since Akane had in fact far surpassed her ex-boyfriend since around a week after the first date. However the chauvinism of teenage boys did not allow the idea of a boyfriend being weaker than "his" girl.

With the title of "strongest" up in the air, the boys at Furinkan who desired her took up the mantle. Just as he defeated her in the judo club, they would defeat her! And each and every boy was so sure once she fell they'd be in perfect love and they'd never slack off. So Akane would love them forever.

Nobody ever said Furinkan was filled with Japan's best and brightest.

With a shout of "I love you!" the boys charged at the target of their love. Akane had entered the school grounds with a grim determination, staring at the charging horde.

Surely today would be the day, they collectively thought, that she falls to their might and will love them.

" **Happo-Fire Burst!"**

There were no survivors.

 

**Part 2: Making Friends**

 

Ranma, alias "Aiko," heard the explosion. However, looking around the students heading to school around her didn't really react. So, figuring it was something normal, she kept up her usual pace.

Still, she couldn't help but stumble in surprise at the sight once she crossed the gates. There was now a smoldering crater in the middle of the school grounds, the moaning and unconscious bodies of boys scattered everywhere. There was one young man who wasn't laying down in agony, but that was mainly because was running around in a panic. Because his hakama and shinai were on fire.

Why the kendoka didn't just drop the flaming sword was beyond Ranma's comprehension. Maybe he was an idiot.

"Help me!" The burning boy ran towards the girl who Ranma was being forced to crossdress to meet. "Please Akane Tendo!" Well, now Ranma had a name, at least.

Akane noticed the boy was on fire, and her expression changed from anger to concern. "Oh! Ah! Um… I'll go get the extinguisher!" She turned and began to run to the school.

The boy's face split into a grin, Ranma's eyes widened as she saw the boy lift up his flaming shinai. "Thank you my love!" He brought the shinai down… only to hit nothing.

Akane had stepped to the side once the attack had started, she turned back to face the boy and Ranma recoiled at the sheer **hate** on her face. Without a word she kicked the boy off into the distance. Ranma heard the sound of a splash a moment later, she had kicked him into the canal it seems.

"I should have known…" Akane said darkly, before turning on her heel and marching into school like nothing had happened.

"Well, I guess that answers that question." Ranma said, walking past the battered boys. "They're idiots." She walked into school, her head held up, taking care not to give the walking hormones a glance.

She did have to kick one who tried to look up her skirt though.

* * *

"OK class, today we have a new student today." Her homeroom teacher announced, "Please give her a warm welcome."

Akane's eyes widened a little at the girl who came in. She was sure more than a few people had.

She was short, but that wasn't exactly a mark against her. "Petite" was the word Akane would use. She had a figure that many girls would kill for, and a natural beauty that shone even though it was obvious that she was wearing no makeup. The girl bowed in front of the class.

"Hello. I'm Aiko Saotome. I've been studying in China the past two years. I hope we can get along for the senior year. I practice my family's style of Martial Arts. My other hobbies are cooking and drawing."

Akane gasped, Aiko's eyes were focused directly at her! _Does she know me?_ She thought, then she felt herself flush with embarrassment. _She probably saw me this morning. Great. I bet she thinks I'm some kind of violent maniac._

Aiko nodded as the homeroom teacher instructed her to take a seat. Akane found she couldn't look away. After all, Aiko was moving with a natural grace that was turning quite a few heads. Akane scowled as she noticed a few boys giving her looks. As if she would let anybody else be victims of the sludge known as the Furinkan High male student body.

Aiko took her seat, and class began.

* * *

If Ranma received one more note she was going to kill someone. Dozens of little papers asking if she wanted to have lunch with him. Notes asking if she had a boyfriend, as if the thought didn't make her shudder, notes asking what sort of "tricks" she had picked up in China. **Those** notes she incinerated with a burst of hot ki. She couldn't remember this kind of obnoxious attention from school at Nǚjiézú. Had she been in China so long she had gone native? Was this kind of behavior normal in Japanese culture?

If it was then she was seriously considering immigrating.

Still, the bell announcing lunch had come, so hopefully she could accomplish step one of this plan. Standing up with her lunchbox, she walked past the hopeful gazes of so many boys to her target.

"Hi." She said to Akane, "Can I sit here?"

Akane looked up from her own lunch, looking a bit surprised. "Oh… um…. sure?"

Ranma pulled up a chair, sitting on the other side of Akane's desk. "So…" She decided it would be best to just ask out right, "What was with that?"

"That?" Akane asked, before comprehension dawned. "Oh… that." Her face split into a scowl.

"Um, err, you don't need to talk about it if you don't want to…" Ranma mumbled. _Stupid! Way to make a bad impression!_ "Sorry…"

Akane shook her head, "No… no it's OK. It's not your fault. It's those stupid men."

"So what is it about?" Ranma said, "I mean, you don't seem to like it…"

"Of course I don't like it!" Akane looked around the room, glaring at the males in the classroom. "Those idiots somehow think that if they beat me in a fight I'll go on a date with them."

Ranma raised an eyebrow, "Why on earth with they think that?"

"Because…." Akane gripped the edge of her desk, not noticing the cracks forming. "Because… ugg… because I met my ex-boyfriend in a martial arts club, and I joked that he could take me on a date if he beat me in a sparring match."

Ranma frowned, "And so…?"

"And then I broke up with him. And within two days the biggest gathering of idiots ever to exist decide that assault is the best way to attract a woman." Akane pulled apart her chopsticks with a snort of derision, beginning the process of eating lunch. "I don't know what I ever saw in men. They're all pigs."

Ordinarily Ranma would at least attempt to defend her birth gender. However, the notes and leers from the boys in her class had caused her to nod in agreement. "Oh my god you're so right. I've been getting harassing little notes all morning." Her own frustration on unwanted advances had caused her to sympathize with the plight of the girl in front of her. "Do these guys really think I can't tell exactly where they're looking as they ask me in cute little words if I'm seeing anyone?"

"Oh you poor thing." Akane giggled a bit in sympathy. "I guess you're just kind of doomed to... stand out, as it were."

"I really wish I didn't. These things are a giant pain. Wish I was just flat chested or something..." Ranma sighed, opening her own lunch. "Granny would be saying it's just Karma right about now..."

Akane smirked, "Wonder what you did to deserve that kind of karma then?"

"Probably a mass-murderer in a past life." Ranma said.

"If that's what you did, then what did I do?" Akane asked.

Ranma looked thoughtful for a minute, "Killed the dinosaurs?" She finally suggested.

This caused Akane to laugh for the first time in a week. "Yeah I guess that's what it has to be huh."

* * *

With lunch over it was time for what Ranma had been dreading. Gym class.

The gym teacher looked at the doctors note Ranma had handed her, her expression somewhat less than believing. "You have a medical condition… that doesn't let you take hot showers."

"That's right." Ranma said. "I'd rather not avoid gym class… so is there a private stall I can change and shower in?"

The note was authentic, a doctor had owed Genma a favor, and the teacher couldn't find any reason that Ranma might be lying. Other than an extreme sense of shyness, and there would be much easier ways to get out changing in the normal girls locker rooms.

"Fine, Saotome. There's a few changing rooms for handicapped kids down this way. I'll let you use one."

"Thank you." Ranma bowed, sighing in relief. She didn't know what she would have done if she had been forced to change with the rest of the girls. Well, other than try not to imagine her mother's nods of approval. She quickly ducked into the private changing room. A cold shower and swift donning of the gym clothing followed.

She ran out to the field with the girls in class, Akane noticed her and waved her over. "Hey Aiko! Join up with me!"

"What's going on?" Ranma asked.

"We're playing badminton today." Akane pointed to the stack of rackets. "Come on. Let's team up."

Ranma picked up a racket. "Never played it."

"Well it's easy to get. You hit the birdie onto the other side of the net, and if your opponent doesn't knock it back to your side then you get a point. First to twenty-one points is the winner." Akane said, "Don't worry, I won't be too tough on you."

The other girls had already paired off and were starting to play, Ranma picked up what she guessed was a birdie.

"Ready when you are!" Akane called out from the other side of the net. "You want to serve first?"

Ranma grinned, "Sure." The racket was pretty light, same with the little birdie. She felt a little bad for Akane for a minute… but then shook her head with a smile. This was just a game, after all. She flicked the birdie into the air, before swinging the racket at it with a loud crack! The birdie flew towards Akane's side of the game field at such speeds that it couldn't even be seen. Yet… Akane moved to intercept it! With an equally loud crack the birdie was sent flying back to Ranma at supersonic speeds. This time Ranma knocked it up high into the air, giving her time to stare at Akane.

Akane gave Ranma a confident smirk. "Don't you want to play Aiko?"

"Hah! Bring it Akane!"

It could be said that the first Martial Arts Badminton match was played that day. It didn't take long for the rest of the girls to stop their own matches and gawk at the sight. Akane was bouncing around the small field, smacking the birdie so fast some onlookers were amazed the thing didn't break. Ranma had at one point knocked the birdie into the air and was ready to spike it down when Akane warned her about it being against the rules for her to hit it twice before reaching Akane's side. Luckily it still barely managed to avoid falling into Ranma's side, So Akane bounced it back, and the back and forth resumed.

Finally, a single small slip up occurred. Akane got a feint in and made Ranma think she was going to knock the birdie to the left… and then Akane snapped it to the right. The birdie hit the ground, to Ranma's shock, and promptly exploded on impact.

"Point for me!" Akane said, jumping for joy just as the bell signifying P.E was over rang. "And it looks like I win by default."

"Oh come on." Ranma grumbled. "Stupid game…" She pointed at Akane, "J-just you wait until we play Volleyball! I'll beat you then!"

"Sure thing Aiko." Akane said, seeming to find Ranma's pouting over her loss amusing.

* * *

Akane had to admit, Aiko was cute when she pouted.

The rest of the school day, that the new student kept stealing glances at Akane. She knew this because Akane couldn't help but try and steal glances at her. There was just something about Aiko that Akane felt drawn to. The girl's twinges of nervousness did little to hide the confident control Akane could see behind her every movement. Akane wanted to see more of the girl, to **compete** with her.

It had always been an annoying aspect of her life. She supposed it was inevitable with her dealing with old fashioned types like the average professional martial artist. So many of her opponents had underestimated or insulted her because she was a girl. She had proved them wrong, of course, but more than one jerk had dismissed her victory as him holding back against a girl.

Now comes Aiko, a girl who claimed to study martial arts, and if the day's P.E class had been any consideration, was at least Akane's equal in athletic ability. Akane wanted to drag the girl to the dojo and see how she fares in a match. Still, that was for later, right now she needed to talk to her. Akane needed to learn more about Aiko before she would barge in and demand a fight. Etiquette demanded at least a week of friendship before a challenge to savage combat.

With school over Akane decided what she needed to do. She saw Aiko packing up her books and slinging her bookbag over her shoulders. "Hey!" Akane called her attention, running across the classroom. "Aiko."

"Hmm?"

"Want to go somewhere?" Akane asked with a smile.

"Wh-what?" Aiko stammered, a faint blush forming on her face. She looked absolutely adorable. Akane wondered what got her shy all of a sudden… maybe it was easier for Aiko to interact with people in the structured setting of the school.

"Yeah, you know. Maybe we could get something to eat. My treat." Akane offered.

The promise of free food seemed to shake Aiko out of her her shyness, a wide grin appearing. "Sure!"

* * *

"And here we are!" Akane had led Ranma to a small restaurant tucked away in a corner of the shopping district. "Here you can find the best okonomiyaki in Tokyo." She pushed open the door, and lead Ranma inside.

The place was small, but cozy. There were a few people having a late lunch, and instantly a cute waitress with long hair and a pretty kimono jumped in front of the door. "Welcome to Ucchan's. Oh! Akane!"

"Hey there sugar!" Another girl at the front counter, flipping okonomiyaki on a girl she's behind, waved to them.

"Come on in Aiko." Akane grabbed Aiko's hand and pulled her over to the front counter. "This is Ukyo. The one who makes the best okonomiyaki in Tokyo."

"Uh, hi." Ranma sat down, "You can… ah, call me Aiko. Aiko Saotome."

"Ukyo Kuonji." Ukyo gave Ranma a nod and a smile, "So Akane dragged you here huh?"

"She's new here." Akane said, "By the way I'll take a curry-chicken one please."

"Uhh… whatever you think is good." Ranma said.

"One surprise coming up." Ukyo said, "So what do you think of Nerima?"

"It's… busy." Ranma answered, "I mean…"

"You're more a country gal?" Ukyo said, "I know how that is. I didn't live much in the city until I moved here."

"Nerima's a great place!" The waitress popped in next to Ranma. "There's so many people and Ukyo's showed me so many amazing things. Like hot baths!"

Ranma stared at her, "Uh…."

"Meet Konatsu." Akane said, "Ukyo's boyfriend. He's lived a hard life."

"Boyfriend!?" Ranma stared at what for all appearances looked to be a pretty young girl. "Um, er… have you ever been to China?"

"China? No can't say I have." Konatsu answered, "Oh.. how wonderful it would be to travel to such far off exotic lands!"

Ukyo laughed, "Geez Akane. You're going to have to let somebody figure it out on their own eventually."

Konatsu looked confused, "Well I think it's perfectly self evident. I mean, sure I didn't know at first… but only because I didn't actually meet any other men for the longest time." Konatsu smiled, "I mean, I can always tell what gender people are easily enough." Konatsu leaned in towards Ranma and whispered, "Your secret is safe with me." Which promptly made Ranma lose around five years of her life.

**How?**

"Picking out crossdressers is the most useless talent I can think of." Ukyo commented.

Ranma laughed, a little too loudly, "I dunno it seems… interesting!"

Konatsu nodded and got back to doing… his… waitress job. Leaving the two and a half girls to continue their conversation.

"Oh yeah, Aiko, you studied in China right?" Akane said.

"Well, that's more like the capstone really…" Ranma said. "Me, Mom, and Pops spent pretty much my entire life as kind of nomads I guess. It was all for training in the martial arts, Pops wanted me to be the best of the best, so we went all over Japan. Then, three years ago actually, we headed to China to finish off the journey."

"Wow…" Akane said, "My dad never did anything like that…"

"That brings back memories." Ukyo said with a smile, "Wandering with my handmade cart, cooking okonomiyaki by the raging sea…"

"Well anyways, after a year of training we, uh, decided to settle down in a little. Well, kind of. There were a fair bit of people living there and everyone had extended family all through China… but still, I don't think there were more than a couple thousand at a time. It was nice and mostly quiet, past two years of High School were there. Learned a lot of stuff from Granny too… Anyways, after two years of that Mom and Pop decided it was time to head back to Japan, so here I am."

"Impressive." Ukyo said, flipping the food she was making over the grill. "Must have been a colorful life."

"Ehh it only really got interesting in China." Ranma admitted, remembering some of her old opponents like Herb.

"Funny. My life got interesting around two years back too when the Master got out…" Akane murmured nostalgically.

"So…" Ranma glanced back to Konatsu, "I'm a bit surprised to see a guy dress like that… I mean, I'm not judging or anything..."

"It's no big deal really." Akane said, "I mean, Ukyo makes a pretty dashing guy too you know."

"Well aren't you a charmer Akane." Ukyo said, grinning. "Yeah. I guess it makes me and Konatsu a perfect little pair huh?" Akane and Ukyo laughed in that way that friends laughed at an old joke. "Anyways, here, want to see how much of a hunk I can be?" Ukyo pulled out a wallet, retrieving a photograph and handing it to Ranma.

It was a group shot of six people. Ranma recognized Akane and Kontasu, and she quickly realized the handsome young man standing next to Konatsu was Ukyo. The other three though.. one was a tall boy in a hakama, his arm around Akane's shoulder. A somewhat scruffy young man with a bandana holding up his hair, and another girl with long black wavy hair tied up in a ponytail next to him. "Other friends of yours?" Ranma asked.

Ukyo nodded. "Yeah, that's Ryoga Hibiki over there…" Pointing to the bandana boy, "Kodachi Kuno, she kind of has a crush on him, and there's her older brother Tatewaki. He's Akane's boyfriend."

A brief silence fell over Akane and Ranma once she finished that sentence.

"Hmm? Did I say something?" Ukyo said.

"Ah… Ukyo…" Akane said, "I, um, broke up with Tatewaki."

"Whaaat!?" Ukyo said, "Are you serious?"

"Y-yeah…" It was quite a change, Ranma noticed. She known Akane for a day, really. But she had managed to see a fairly broad range of emotions. There was her anger at the idiots attacking her. That had been a white hot rage that Ranma wanted to stay as far away from as possible. Yet there had also been friendliness, a competitive nature, and a smile that Ranma found herself liking. Yet the emotion on Akane's face right now was almost like she was sick.

"Wow. I never would have thought. What happened?" Ukyo asked.

If anything that sick expression grew more intense. It would not have surprised Ranma if Akane just started vomiting. "I… um…"

Ranma frowned, realizing that maybe this wasn't something that could be talked about with a near total stranger. "Um, it's OK. I don't think it's any of my business…" She had known that the boy in the photo was Akane's ex-boyfriend, but she could already tell that the circumstances behind it were not happy.

"No!" Akane said, "It's fine Aiko. You're my friend too… both you and Ukyo can hear this." Then Akane noticed that Konatsu was trying to slip out, "You too!" She shouted to him. Upon hearing that Konatsu smiled a bit sheepishly. The rest of the people in the restaurant began the practice of suddenly no longer hearing a private conversation. "He…" She took a deep breath, "I found… I found him cheating on me."

Konatsu gasped, while Ukyo looked flabbergasted. Ranma just scowled, growing an instant dislike for the boy in the photo.

"That doesn't make any sense…" Ukyo said, "I mean…. the guy was kind of **obsessed** with you. Real possessive."

Indignation flashed, "He seemed to think that I'd be just fine with him two timing me. He had the goddamn nerve to come to my house and tell me he loved us both." Ranma noticed her hands were gripping the counter hard enough to leave indents.

"That's…" Ukyo frowned, "I… hmm…" She looked pensive.

"What?" Ranma asked.

"Kuno has… well, always been a bit of an old fashioned type, you know?" Ukyo said to a nodding Akane. "Styled himself a feudal samurai and all that. Heck, he even speaks like he's in some period piece."

Ranma noticed that Akane smiled slightly, in spite of her bad mood. "Yeah… I always thought it was a bit cute…"

"Well… you know how old feudal lords were…" Ukyo said, "Maybe… he didn't think anything of it. Like… you were going to be his wife… and he'd of course have some, um, mistresses?"

The faint nostalgic smile was wiped from Akane's face. "...oh… oh…." With a thud Akane's face was slapped into her hands. "Of course. Of **course.** Just like our first date, just like everything else." She muttered into her hands. "Of course. Just of course. Nothing more than another prop for his little perverted fantasy. Like everything else. **Men."** Akane's fists clenched, and Ranma could see the start of a glowing red aura building up around her. Ukyo and Konatsu noticed it as well. They were starting to sweat. Then Ranma noticed that everyone else in the restaurant was now slowly putting distance between themselves and Akane.

"Akane…?" Ranma said quietly. Part of her mind was already processing ways to calm her down if the girl went berserk.

"It's… it's not fair… why couldn't he have… why…." Akane's fists clenched. "Maybe… maybe if I had… I mean… if he thought that he needed someone else for… for that **need…** Maybe I'd… I wouldn't have learned… and we'd still…"

Ranma could tell what was happening now… Akane was starting to drown herself in her own negative emotions. She was blaming **herself** for what happened. Ranma had a pretty good idea what Akane was muttering about, and it made her sigh. Moping like this wasn't healthy, and Ranma knew that someone of Akane's physical ability would have an easy time causing plenty of unintentional property damage in her miserable rampage. She needed to snap Akane out of it, for her own good as well as others. So, with a grim expression, she executed one of the Saotome School's patented techniques for snapping people out of grim moods. "Rouse the Sleeping Dragon!"

She slapped Akane on the back of the head. Of course, to get the attention of a martial artist of Akane's calibur, the slap was hard enough to knock Akane into the counter. Ranma patiently waited for Akane to recover from the slap. If Ranma was her father, this would be the point where she'd deliver a snide comment to Akane and shift the self-loathing into much more productive anger at a punchable face. But Ranma was not Genma, and she didn't want Akane mad at **her.** So instead she sighed, and put both her hands on Akane's shoulders. "He's an idiot." She said.

"You don't even know him." Akane whimpered.

"True. He's still an idiot though." Ranma said. "He would have done the same thing no matter what. Sleeping with him wouldn't have made a difference except for how **you** feel about it. Probably would have made things worse."

That was enough, it seemed. Tears welled up in Akane's eyes, before she exploded into sobbing, practically falling over into Ranma. Crying in the shorter girl's chest. "It's not… it's not fair…" She heard Akane say between shuddering breaths.

The crisis passed, the patrons of the restaurant resumed properly ignoring that anything was going on and Konatsu and Ukyo resumed their work. Ranma, meanwhile, was inwardly panicking. She had expected Akane to calm down! Not latch onto her like this! She had brief flashbacks to Shampoo's more affectionate days, but this was different. Akane didn't seem to expect **anything** but for Ranma to continue to allow her to sob into her blouse. She glanced over to Ukyo, a silent plea for help given. Ukyo just shrugged, her expression a mixture of sympathy for Akane and bemusement at Ranma's shock.

Finally, Akane seemed to calm down a little. She pulled away from Ranma, blushing as she realized just what she had done in a public place. "Sorry…" She muttered to Ranma.

Ranma shrugged, "It's OK. Didn't hurt me or anything."

Akane gave Ranma a sunny smile that made her heart skip a beat. "Thanks Aiko."

"N-no problem…"

"Your food's done." Ukyo put down two plates of okonomiyaki in front of Akane and Ranma, "Feeling better now Sugar?"

Akane gave a slight nod before biting down at her okonomiyaki. "It's just… ugg. I'm sorry Aiko, I wanted to show you a nice time and I made it about **my** problems."

Ranma shrugged, "It's fine. It's, um, pretty easy to see you've been having a lot of them recently."

"That's obvious." Ukyo said.

"It's worse than you think." Ranma said, "Every day since the breakup a group of horny jackasses attack her, thinking if they beat her up she'll be their girlfriend."

Ukyo couldn't find a reply for that.

"Stupid men. Worthless, all of them." Akane mumbled.

Ukyo tried to give Akane a reassuring smile, "Oh come on Akane… not all guys are bad."

"Oh and I suppose that's why you crossdress so you get fair prices from your suppliers and keep your rent from getting doubled?" Akane spat back acidly. Ukyo winced but didn't counter that. "Face it Ukyo. Just because we're girls we're always going to be second best in **their** eyes. I'll always be a silly girl playing at being a fighter. Everybody will be looking at you wondering when you're going to stop this and get married so you can just cook for your man at home. Just because we're girls even if they think they love us they have no problem having a little fun on the side because they're **men** and it's their right."

"Konatsu isn't like that…" Ukyo said.

"Konatsu was raised as a girl." Akane replied.

Ranma wanted to speak up, saying that she wasn't like that. Except that, well, she didn't really look like a man at the moment. Then memories of before Jusenkyo drifted into her mind… things she had said to guys she had gotten into fights with.

" _You hit like a girl!"_

" _Get up you sissy!"_

" _Hiding behind your mommy? Some man you are!"_

Ranma wasn't generally a malicious person. She knew the value of taunts to throw off her opponent. And she knew that one of the best ways to throw guys off their game was to compare them to a girl. Had she really, even subconsciously, fallen into the patterns Akane was complaining about? She… she didn't really know **how** girls lived in Japan, did she? She had traveled around as a young man, and nobody batted an eye at **him** wanting to be strong and learning to fight. Even with the curse, she had spent almost the entirety of her time with it in Nǚjiézú. Everyone in the town had known about it and was understanding. Plus the way women were treated there was very different than even most of China, let alone Japan.

_And here you are, Saotome, using this girl to fix your own problems._

Ranma took that thought and forced it out of her mind. She cursed whatever magic that produced the cure for prohibiting Akane knowing about the process. If only that condition didn't exist, she'd gladly tell the girl about it and beg for a single simple kiss. Then she'd leave Akane alone…

_It's just a kiss, and she'll never have to know… "Aiko" will just leave, and we can go our separate ways._

"Uh, Aiko, your food's getting cold." Ukyo said.

"Oh. Sorry… got distracted." Ranma took a bite out of the okonomiyaki. "It's good." She said, giving Ukyo a smile.

* * *

Akane didn't know whether to feel relieved or die of embarrassment. She had just dumped all of her problems on her new friend in public! She was grateful that Aiko seemed to be understanding about the entire ordeal. Akane was also a little angry at herself, especially for that bit of self loathing Aiko had thankfully slapped her out of.

As much as Akane wished she could just sever her entire relationship with him, she **still** had feelings for Tatewaki. Feelings of love and affection don't just die overnight, even with a sudden betrayal.

They had left Ucchan's with a bit of a heavier heart then they had when they entered. Akane didn't know when they'd part ways. Aiko had been quiet since the talk, and seemed to be thinking about what to say.

"Aiko…" Akane asked quietly. "If… if he were to come back, apologize to me, and swear never to do anything like it again… and I accepted and got back together with him… would that make me pathetic?"

Aiko shrugged, "Can't say. Not really my place to judge."

"Well, what would you do?"

Aiko gave a frown, not seeming to like the idea. "Well.. I'd never have- Err… I guess if I **did** have something like that happen to me, I'd beat the crap out of the guy first."

Akane giggled, "Well, I've already done that."

"Now, would I get back with the guy? No idea. What about you? Would you?"

"I don't know either. I think… maybe? Maybe not." Akane sighed, "It'd make my life easier, to go back to the way it was, at least."

This made Aiko give a rather dismissive snort. "It wouldn't go back to the way it was, no matter what, I think. Even if you got back with him, even if he promised, I don't think you'd quite trust him the same way."

"Yeah, I guess you have a point." Akane said.

"So, Akane, can you do me a favor?" Aiko said, her expression suddenly brightening.

"What?"

"Let me see your house."

Akane stared at her new friend, "Uh…?"

"Well, we're going to be walking to school together from now on, so I want to see where you live!" She answered with a grin like it was the most obvious answer in the world.

The smile with infectious, and Akane couldn't help but smile in kind. "Sure thing. Follow me. I'll show you the way."

* * *

" _Tendo Dojo"_  
" _Anything Goes Martial Arts"  
_ " _To challenge the owner to savage combat, please use the back door."_

To Ranma, it was like a little kid discovering Akane owned a candy factory.

Akane's family had their own **dojo!** It was the most amazing thing ever! She, who had always had to learn the family's style in empty lots or distant campgrounds, the idea of just being able to stand up and head into her own private dojo any time she wanted… it was like a dream.

"You look like you're about to start drooling Aiko." Akane commented.

Ranma, realizing she had been staring, glanced at Akane and blushed a little. "It's just… wow… this is amazing! Your own dojo Akane! Your family must be rich or something… wow… a house like this! So nice… with your own dojo!"

Akane blushed a little, but couldn't help but feel a bit of pride at her own family history. "This house has been in the Tendo Family since before the Meiji era. We've been studying in the dojo for generations."

To Ranma, who's only family heirloom was the katana her mother carried around, this was beyond amazing... she couldn't help but feel a little jealous that while she had spent her youth a wanderer, Akane had everything she had needed to become a great martial artist right at her fingertips. "I…" Ranma closed her eyes. It just wasn't fair.

_Damn you Jusenkyo. Might as well gain the benefit of this while I can._

Ranma bowed to Akane, "May I practice in your dojo?" Akane stepped back, surprised at the sudden formality. "I mean, not right now, but later.. when I want to or need to practice. I.. never really… please?"

Akane laughed a little, "Of, of course Aiko. You can come over whenever you want. We're friends you know?"

Ranma was glad she was bowing, so Akane didn't see the wince on her face "Thank you. I, um, think I'll head home now."

"See you tomorrow then?" Akane asked.

"Yeah." Ranma straight up, slipping on a glossy smile. "See you tomorrow Akane."

 _Tomorrow, Akane,_ Ranma thought, _I'll make sure I start paying you for all this._


	3. Martial Arts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like talking about fighting to help make friends. Also somebody gets kidnapped, what a bother.

"You've made friends with her already?" Genma said, grinning "Great job boy."

"Oh this is so romantic…" Nodoka said. "Secretly comforting her in her hour of need!"

"Yeah, whatever." Ranma said. Naturally his parents had asked how his first day of school/progress on getting a cure had gone. He hadn't meant to give much details. But his parents kept pressing him until he ended up revealing everything but how he had felt when Akane had hugged him and smiled at him.

 **That** he was taking to his grave.

"At this rate you'll be cured in no time!" Genma said with a laugh.

"Look, Pop, I know you're excited. But come on, I need to be patient here." Ranma said. "I mean… it's just…" He mumbled as he seemed unable to articulate his point. "I'm going to go do some homework." Ranma stood up and headed over to his room.

However, upon reaching there he found he couldn't focus on the school work at hand. Math and English weren't very interesting at the moment. After realizing he was stuck on the same problem for ten minutes he shut the book and groaned. He was way too distracted. He needed to focus on getting a cure…

Finally, he gave into his listlessness. He pulled out a well used sketch-pad, noted that he'd have to buy a new one soon, and started absentmindedly sketching. Leaning forward and sighing, he thought back to the girl he had befriended.

"She's pretty cute." He murmured to himself.

 

**Part 3: Martial Arts**

 

Breakfast was a trial at the Tendo Household.

Akane was in the kitchen, her mind focused on the task; Making a non-dangerous breakfast. She knew that if she let her control slip, her… habits… would come into play. If her habits came out then only disaster awaited for her poor father. Akane had become immune, after all, so she could make lunch for herself without much thought.

Still, today was a good one. Breakfast was perfect, and Soun noticed that Akane was in a better mood than she had been the past week. There was a real smile on her face as she served the rise and miso soup to him. She sat down and began eating her own much larger serving.

"How has school been?" Soun asked, deciding that since his daughter was in a better mood today then she had been, it was time to strike up conversation.

For an instant, Akane's expression darkened, before shaking her head and Soun could tell she was forcing herself to focus on happier matters. "I made a new friend. Her name's Aiko Saotome. She's a martial artist like me."

"That sound's wonderful." Soun nodded. He knew how desperately Akane treasured friends that shared her love of Martial Arts. "How is she?"

"Uh, I don't know. I think she's really good. She wants to practice here." Akane said. "She says she learned her family style her whole life."

Soun nodded, "Sounds interesting. Well, it has been a while since my baby girl had a challenge no?" He gave her a proud smile. Of course he was proud of her, she was his strong student. His daughter who had followed in his footsteps and had grown beyond what anything he had expected or hoped.

"I'm looking for a friend, not a punching bag." Akane said, though she was still smiling.

"Glad to hear that things are going well for you." Soun said, knowing of his daughter's competitive nature.

The frown returned. "Well… it's not perfect. I've been… getting bothered, a little, by some boys at school."

Soun scowled, "What kind of 'bothering'?"

"Oh, it's just, that they found out I'm single. So they're constantly asking me out. I turn them down, it's not that big a deal Dad. Just annoying."

Still, Soun frowned. "It's still not right. Maybe I should call the principal…"

Akane winced, "It's no problem Dad. I can handle it." Little did Soun know that Akane had gone to the principal the second day the fights started. It hadn't really ended well, and Akane had ended up just dodging haircuts and exploding pineapples. Again. "Me and the principal have never really been on good terms, you know."

Soun sighed, "Well, if you say so Akane. I know you can handle it." Tears began to fall down his face, "Oh my precious baby girl has grown to be such strong young woman! If only your mother was here to see this day!"

Akane finished her breakfast, "OK. Thank you Dad. I'm off to school now."

* * *

It was a cool morning. Akane took a deep breath. It was time for another day of school. Another day of dealing with… them.

"Hey, Akane!" A voice called from behind her.

"Ehh..?" Akane turned around, "Aiko?"

"Hey." Aiko waved, her schoolbag in hand. "You look surprised."

"Well, I am a little…" Akane said.

"Hey, I told you I'd be walking to school with you." Aiko said with a brisk laugh. "It's not too bad, I live a little bit back that way." She pointed behind her, "It's just a little detour."

"Thanks then." Akane said. Both of them began walking towards the school in pace with one another. She glanced over at her companion. Just like yesterday, it was clear that Aiko had put very little effort into how she looked. And it was also clear to Akane thanks to that hint of jealousy that Aiko didn't need to. Her shiny midnight-black hair was tied back in a simple pony-tail, but that alone was enough. Her face had not even a hint of makeup, and Akane could see her nails were perfect without and polish or treatment.

"So, what's your secret?" Akane asked.

"Eh?" Aiko glanced over to Akane, her eyes widening a little.

"How do you manage to look like an idol without any makeup or anything?" Akane asked.

"I what?" Aiko asked.

"You're probably the prettiest girl I've ever seen Aiko. And you do it all effortlessly! What's your secret?" Akane laughed, "I mean, if you can look like that without bothering with makeup and junk please tell me how."

Akane had to admit, Aiko somehow became cuter once she started blushing and stammering at the complement. "Wh-what about you? I don't see you wearing makeup or other girly stuff like that!"

Akane shrugged, "It's too much **work.** Getting all prettied up is nice and all… but most of the time I just would rather spend that time practicing."

Aiko glanced over to Akane, looking all the world like she wanted to say something. Yet she couldn't seem to find the right words to say, finally she shook her head and instead gave Akane a challenging grin. "Bet you can't run to school up on the fence." With a leap Aiko jumped up on to the fence alongside the canal. She balanced on the fence as easily as the ground.

Akane was torn, on one hand, she had just been directly challenged, on the other… "What if a boy sees up our skirts?"

"We kick em in the face for peeping?" Aiko suggested.

Inflicting righteous violence on perverts was a good enough suggestion. So with a grin Akane jumped up next to Aiko on the fence. Like Aiko she was perfectly balanced on it. The two girls smiled at each other, as they seemed to think about what to do next.

"Wow. You do have some nice balance." Aiko said.

"Never tried this before, but it's nothing I haven't handled before. I've won a dozen Martial Arts Figureskating matches. Fights on ice are way harder than this."

"Martial Arts what?"

"Trust me, Aiko, there are some **weird** fighting styles out there." Akane said, before an idea came to her. Leaning over, she poked Aiko on the nose. "Tag! You're it!" At the announcement of the new game, Akane jumped into the air. With a flip she landed on the other side of Aiko, still balanced on the fence. Sticking out her tongue, she dashed ahead of Aiko.

The game began, and the unspoken rules settled in. Running on the ground was forbidden, only fence running was allowed. Jumps were OK, as Akane flipped over Aiko several times when she tried to tag her. At one point Aiko stretched the rules, tagging Akane and leaping over a group of salarymen walking to work to land on the fence on the other side of the road. Akane responded with a laugh of her own, building up some speed and jumping over as well. From there it became a bouncing aerial game of tag, each one trying to tag the other in the air while still landing on the fences.

The entire game had been incredibly fun, Akane had not run around giggling like this since she was a little girl. It was just nice to be able to cut loose and have some fun. Still… in the end the laughing had to come to a close. Akane spotted the looming presence of Furinkan, and she could now hear the excited chatter of those stupid boys. In an instance her mood darkened, as she remembered the troubles of her life. The fun gone, she jumped off the fence, landing on the sidewalk. She'd approach the boys head on, as was her way. Akane Tendo did **not** back down.

"Akane?" Aiko instantly seemed to notice her darkening mood, landing beside her. "Um… it's those idiots, isn't it?"

Akane sighed, a very long sigh. "Yes. It's been the same all week. They rush at me, I knock them down, and tomorrow they do it again. It's just… just…" She gritted her teeth. She would not cry again. She had let it out yesterday, that was enough. Akane had allowed herself to be weak long enough. It was time to be strong.

"Isn't there anything you can do? Maybe talk to the teachers or-"

"Nobody can do anything about it." Akane growled, "Nobody's going to interfere with my life, they never have and they never will." While Akane knew she was popular with the student body ( **too** popular, if these hormonal jackasses were any indication) she also knew that the staff only tolerated her… oddness about being a strong martial artist thanks to her good grades and behavior when not involved in a fight. Well, that and she'd beat up the Principal whenever he got out of line. As far as the adults at Furinkan was concerned, this was just another chapter in the weirdness that was Akane Tendo's life.

" **I** can do something about it." Aiko snapped.

Akane frowned, "No Aiko. You can't help me fight them off! If you do they might go after you too!"

"Then we won't fight them then!" Aiko snapped.

"We're- **I'm** not running away!" Akane growled.

"It's not running! It's the Saotome School Final Technique! Pull back and find a new plan!" Aiko said.

"How is that different from running?"

"Uh…. we come back later?" Aiko suggested, "Once we figure out a plan."

Akane folded her arms, "OK then. So you have any ideas?"

"Not one. I mean, if you beating up those morons for a week straight didn't convince them I don't know what will." Aiko said.

Akane rolled her eyes, "OK then. So you don't have any better ideas about stopping this."

"I can at least give you a break!" Aiko said, "Please, maybe if you don't fight them they'll give up." Aiko took a deep breath, before reaching out and grabbing Akane's hand. "Can you trust me?"

Akane nearly stepped back from the look in Aiko's eyes. There was a hard shining gleam in them. Her eyes are blue, Akane realized. "You… ah…" She couldn't help but be drawn into them. Why was she looking so serious…? "I… OK. I trust you, Aiko."

Aiko's expression changed to a warm smile. "Good. Tell me, Akane, how good are you at hiding your presence?"

"Um, pretty good." Akane had practiced a lot with Tofu. She still couldn't sneak up on **him.** But he was among were very few people she couldn't by this point. Idly she wondered if she could sneak up on Aiko.

"Do it, I want you to be as sneaky as possible." Aiko said.

"OK…" Akane took a deep breath. She closed her eyes for a moment, focusing her presence inward. She slowed her breathing, and made her movements as silently as possible. Opening her eyes, she glanced at Aiko.

"Good. If you snuck off I'd have a hard time finding you."Aiko smiled, "Stick close to me." Aiko pulled Akane right next to her. Akane was now practically leaning against the shorter girl. "Keep as quiet as possible now." Akane slowly nodded in reply. She kept her gaze on Aiko, watching as the girl shifted into a strange stance, holding up her free arm and rising up on her tiptoes. Aiko slouched a bit, pulling Akane slightly down with her.

"Ready?" Aiko asked, her voice a whisper.

Akane nodded.

* * *

It was another lovely day at the market. There were quite some good deals going on. And if there was one thing Kasumi Ono was good at, it was finding deals.

In some ways, cooking for two rather than a full family was easier. Less food to look for, and she could afford to be more experimental with her dishes. On the other hand, it was harder to find good deals when she couldn't buy as much in bulk. Still, no matter what it was nice. While she knew it wasn't for everyone, Kasumi really did enjoy being a homemaker. She picked up a melon, tapping it to see if it was ripe. However, her shopping was interrupted.

Though she hadn't ever had much of an interest in martial arts beyond the basic self-defense her father had insisted she learn, Kasumi had long learned about sensing when people were following her. Especially with her husband's childish habit of sneaking up on everyone. She glanced behind her, nobody was there. She looked up, she couldn't see anybody on the roof-tops. With a shrug, Kasumi decided she must have imagined it, and continued inspecting her fruit.

Then somebody jumped up from behind the stalls and grabbed her.

* * *

The saw their goddess, their goal, their love, Akane approach. Today she was being oddly close to a new girl. The few in her class recognized her as Aiko Saotome, a transfer student who Akane seemed to have made friends with yesterday. They didn't pay her much attention. After all, she was pretty cute yes but she wasn't the perfect goddess of war Akane.

With cries of love, they charged at her. Ready to finally earn Akane's affection in battle. They charged even as neither of the girls made any move. Some of the closer boys noticed Aiko's scowl, the new student pulling Akane closer to her. With her free hand, Aiko reached into her book bag. With a sharp tug, a large cloth was pulled out of the bag.

The boys continued to charge.

Aiko was still glaring at the boys, they were just a few meters from her and Akane. Akane seemed to be doing her best to keep emotionless. With a flourish Aiko flung the cloth out, causing it to spread out and remove both girls from their sight briefly.

Then the boys suddenly skidded to a stop.

This was because the as the cloth fluttered through the air, it seemed to fade as it was pulled back away from where the two girls should be standing. However, there was not a single trace of Aiko or Akane anywhere. Both of the girls had vanished, without a single trace anywhere.

* * *

Ranma grinned as she quietly carried Akane around the slackjawed morons. They couldn't see her, couldn't feel her, and lacked the slightest bit of training to even attempt to find them. Once she had thrown the cloth over them, she had scooped Akane into her arms. Now she was carrying her to school.

Akane was not soft at all, Ranma realized. Despite having an obvious feminine figure, near every inch of her body was strong muscle. Ranma could **feel** the tension in her arms. It was unlike any other girl Ranma had interacted with.

Not that Ranma regularly held girls or anything like that. But she had decided that carrying Akane was nice, and maybe she could do this more often until the other idiots get a hint. Just to help Akane out. Of course. It feeling good was just a bonus. She quietly slipped through the school's front doors, before setting Akane down and letting out a breath. Several students suddenly turned to the two of them in shock, after all, from their perspective they had appeared out of thin air.

"What was that?" Akane said, her eyes wide with shock. Though there was a big silly grin on her face, "That was more than just concealing your presence, that was… the stance, and the way you pulled yourself in…. was the cloth…?" Akane began mumbling. Ranma couldn't help but laugh as she realized Akane was trying to piece together just what she had done.

"Come on Akane, we have class. We'll talk about it at lunch." Ranma grabbed Akane's arm, snapping her out of her focus.

* * *

Ranma had to admit it was impressive. Akane had slammed her lunchbox onto her desk and sat across from her a mere second after the lunch bell rang. "OK Aiko. Tell me what that was."

Ranma grinned, she had an audience. "'That', Akane, was a part of one of the Saotome School's strongest techniques." She pulled out a pen and paper, "The ultimate forms of the the Saotome School are divided into two branches." Akane looked down at the paper as Ranma wrote down the names.

"First, there's the Yamasenken." Ranma put down the characters meaning _'Mountain of One Thousand Fists'._ "It's not what I used. What I used was the second branch. The Umisenken." Ranma wrote down the characters meaning _'Sea of One Thousand Fists.'_

"Hmm… can't say my school has anything like that." Akane said, "The higher level techniques I know are all just part of Anything Goes. Never divided the school into two branches."

"Well that's because the Saotome School is kind of slapdash." Ranma laughed, "It's a weird mix of Kenpo, Ninjutsu, and whatever stuff Pop made up."

"So your dad invented it?" Akane said, "The style you know?"

"Yup. Pop was really impatient when he was younger. Bounced around from dojo to dojo until he ended up making his own slapdash martial arts style. Pretty effective though. Helped him get ahead when he kept getting run out of towns."

Akane laughed at that last sentence. "So how does it work?"

Ranma grinned, "Hey now. These are high level secrets of my martial arts. I can't just tell you how I do it."

"Come on…" Akane let out an exaggerated whine, "That was one of the coolest things I've seen. I need to figure it out. I mean, I think I've got the stance down. Got to test that in the dojo… and the cloth…"

"Oh geez. Maybe that was a mistake." Ranma said, though still smiling. "Should have tried something else."

"What I really want to know is how you managed to hide me as well." Akane said, "Hiding not just your presence, but mine, even though I was right in front of them…" She closed her eyes in thought, "You did something to me…"

Ranma shrugged, "Well, I guess I can tell a bit more about it." Sure, her dad may not approve of her talking about his secrets. But Ranma could deal with Genma's whining. Plus, it would make Akane happy. _If she's happy she'll be more receptive to kissing me._ Ranma shook her head, forcing that thought out of it. "First off, the two branches were made as a set. The Yamasenken was developed first, and then later Pop developed the Umisenken as the perfect counter."

"That sounds interesting." Akane said, "Wonder why he did that?"

Ranma shrugged, "Can't say. I remember when Pop taught me the Yamasenken. I was sure it was the ultimate martial arts technique. I thought I was unbeatable. It's really strong, you know?" She laughed, "Then he told me to come at him, he used the Umisenken and kicked my ass harder than I had ever been before or since."

"Hmm, maybe it's a way of teaching humility? Show the student that they still have a long way to go." Akane suggested.

"Who knows with Pop. I don't really get him. When it comes to Martial Arts, the man's a genius. But he's a complete boneheaded moron in the rest of his life. Keeping him in line is Mom's full time job." Ranma shook her head, "Anyways. The point is that the Yamasenken and Umisenken were made together and express two different styles and philosophies."

"I can guess that from their names." Akane said.

Ranma couldn't help but give Akane a smirk, "Yeah, I bet. But if you don't understand the core of the two arts, you'll never master them."

"Oh, and what is the core?" Akane smirked right back. "It can't be as silly as Martial Arts Tea Ceremony."

Ranma decided to ask her about that later, "Well, it's a bit embarrassing, in all honesty. Pop was always a bit of a... less than stellar example of morality. Mom did a lot to straighten him out."

If Akane was bothered by the admission, she didn't show it. "Well, I can't really throw out any complaints like that. **My** school was founded by a perverted old panty thief." Akane held up a finger, "One high level technique of the Anything Goes school, 'Catching the Divine Breeze', with it I can deflect powerful strikes using a single finger. Created by my illustrious Master to flip up skirts."

"Well," Ranma said, one eyebrow raised, "I can safely say **that** isn't one of Pop's vices." Despite some of Nodoka's stranger ideas about manly behavior. "So, this is how the two styles work in reality. I didn't understand how the process worked until I saw it." Ranma put the pen to the paper again, writing down the names again using different characters. "Yamasenken." ' _Way of the Noisy Thief.'_ "Umisenken." _'Way of the Silent Thief.'_ "The secrets of the Saotome school." Ranma said with a dry fanfare.

"So…" Akane stared at the paper.

"The Yamasenken, the mugger who smashes down the gates and grabs everything in sight. The Umisenken, the silent burglar who sneaks in and takes your valuables without you ever noticing." Ranma said in a completely deadpan tone. "Pop is something else. He invents techniques that even impress Granny, all for the purpose of being a better petty thief."

"So you were able to keep the boys from noticing me because…"

"Because what good is a thief sneaking off invisible with their stolen goods if they can't make the stuff they're carrying invisible as well?" Ranma said, "I've never tried it with a living thing before. So you hiding your presence helped, I think."

Akane looked like she had just been given candy. "I see! Yes that would work. Now how did you..."

"Sorry, have to keep some secrets." Ranma said, ignoring Akane's exaggerated mock-despair. "Only Saotomes can learn the big secrets of the Saotome school, you know."

Akane sighed dramatically, " Then I'll simply have to force my way into your family somehow then Aiko."

It took all of three seconds for a way for Akane to become a Saotome to rush into Ranma's head, and her face turned red as she quickly looked down at the paper to make sure Akane didn't see the blush. "Heheheheheh… good luck with that." Ranma managed to mumble before forcing the blush to fade and looking back at Akane's face.

She, of course, had no idea about the havoc that her joke had played on Ranma's mind. "So, how about I show you a little trick, just to be fair." She reached into her blouse and pulled out… an old fashioned looking firecracker. It was round, wrapped with brown paper and had a fuse on top. Ranma quickly noticed the entirety of the class that was eating lunch as well instantly backing away against the walls. "It's not lit!" Akane said with a groan once she noticed the terror in their eyes. "Honestly I'm not the principal." she said with a huff, holding out the firecracker to Ranma.

"Uh... is this some Hidden Weapons thing?" Ranma said.

"Nope. It wasn't anywhere until I did the technique." Akane put away the firecracker. "And now it's gone."

"OK. That's… weird." Ranma said, "You… uh… how?"

Akane laughed, "Tell you what. Since you were so nice, I'll let you look at the scroll that has the technique on it."

Ranma's expression brightened at the thought of picking up a new martial arts technique. "R-really?"

"Yup. Come over to my place after school, oh, is that OK with your parents?"

Ranma nodded, "Sure. Pop loves it when I find new techniques and Mom's not going to argue either."

Akane smiled, "Great!"

Ranma took a moment to enjoy the simple happiness Akane showed, "So… um… what did you mean by you're not the principal?"

"Oh. That. Long story."

* * *

Once school ended, Aiko immediately began following Akane. It warmed her heart to see somebody so eager. Aiko had run ahead of her and was now leaning against the gates to the house.

"Follow me." Akane said, taking Aiko's hand and leading her into the Tendo home. "I'll introduce you to my dad, get some snacks made, and then I'll show you the scr-"

 **"Akannnneeeeee!"** Two blubbering, sobbing wrecks that were once grown men charged out of the front door the instance she had opened the gates and walked though.

"She's gone she's gone!"

"My baby! Noooooooo!"

"Kasumi's been- Kasumi's been- **_Kasumi's been-"_**

"Meet my father, Soun Tendo." Akane said dryly to Aiko, pointing to the sobbing and blubbering man at her feet. "And Dr. Tofu Ono, my older sister's husband." Pointing to the man running in circles screaming _"Kasumi's been-"_

"Are they… always like this?" Aiko asked.

"Not really…" Akane sighed, "I think something might be going on with my older sister."

"The Kasumi they're screaming about?"

"Yeah." Akane said, "Dad has always been really protective of us… and Tofu's always a bit weird about Kasumi." She glanced down at her father, "Dad! Stop this!" She grabbed Soun by the front of his gi and shook him. The crying quickly stopped.

Aiko, meanwhile, walked over to Tofu. She grabbed his collar, noticing his fogged up glasses and panicked expression. After a moment's thought, she slapped him in the face a couple times. His glasses cleared up and his noticed that someone he didn't know had just slapped him. "Um, hello Miss?"

* * *

Akane sat down some tea in front of her family and guest, once things had calmed down she had taken charged and ushered everyone into the family room so they could talk. Introductions were made and a few glares from Akane stopped Soun from bursting into tears again. "OK, Dad, Tofu, what is with Kasumi?"

Tofu took a few deep breaths. He needed to stay calm, "She… she went out shopping and didn't come back!"

"Is that it?" Aiko said, "Maybe she got distracted or went to see a movie?"

Tofu shook his head, "She went shopping **this morning.** She's been gone for hours now."

Akane frowned, she had to admit that was a bit worrying. "So this isn't just like last time when she was just catching up with some friends from High School."

"That's right!" Soun shouted, tears streaming down his face. "It's much worse! I found… I found...!"

"Aiko." Akane said. Aiko nodded and slapped Soun in the back of the head. This stopped the tears quickly enough.

"What did you find Dad?" Akane asked.

"This!" Soun held up a cardboard box, the words _"For the Butch"_ were written on it. "It was in Kasumi's old room. And inside there's…"

Akane took the box, opening it up. Inside there was small package wrapped in nylon. She unwrapped it and realized that it wasn't just nylon.

"Pantyhose?" Aiko asked, "Why are you being given pantyhose?"

Akane groaned, this was exactly what she needed. Wrapped up in the pantyhose was a ring and a letter…

"Kasumi's wedding ring!" Tofu said, "Oh god she's-"

"She's fine! The jackass isn't going to do anything." Akane growled, picking up the letter.

> _I have your little homemaker, if you want to have good meals again head up north to that waterfall._
> 
> _Bring the old freak, you know what I want._

"That… oh. My daughter's kidnapped!" Soun started crying again. Aiko glanced at Akane, who just shook her head. There was no saving him.

"Someone kidnapped Kasumi!?" Tofu's eyes fogged over. He was about to panic again when at Akane's nod Aiko slapped him again. "Ah… um, thank you Miss Saotome."

"I can start punching you if you need it." Aiko helpfully suggested.

"I don't think that'll be necessary." Tofu said, "I… I need to stay calm."

"Right. If you want to help me save your wife then you'll have to stay calm." Akane said.

"So… she's in danger?" Aiko said.

Akane shook her head, "I don't think so. I hope **he's** not that stupid."

"Who…?" Aiko asked.

"The idiot who kidnapped my sister." Akane crushed the letter in her hands, "Pantyhose Taro."

* * *

"Would you like some tea Pantyhose Taro?"

The man named Pantyhose Taro glared at his hostage.

It had been a busy year for him. He had desperately tried to find loopholes to the stupid law that meant he had this idiotic name. Nothing had come, and running for his life from that crazy girl Rogue hadn't helped matters. How was he supposed to know those dumb things helped with her back pain?

Asking the freak hadn't helped, trying to trick him hadn't helped. Bribing hadn't helped (he just took the panties and ran). The old pervert proved remarkably resistant to injury so beating the crap out of him didn't do anything. That left one thing, blackmail

He knew that the girl was basically the chef and sole maid of the home. There's no way that hedonistic old letch would want to lose the biggest source of his comfort when not engaging in his perversions. As such, if Happosai wanted his favorite housewife back he **would** give him a new name!

The plan was foolproof, if he thought so himself. Sure, he'd probably send over his student over and she and her fake boyfriend would come over (Seriously, nobody could have that much bad taste in men. He **had** to be her Beard.) But Taro was pretty sure that with the latest addition to his power he would handle her. But it would be several hours, maybe even a day, before she showed up.

Of course, that didn't mean that this was easy relaxing wait for the girl and the letch to show up. Somehow no matter how tightly he tied Kasumi, she always got out in a few minutes. Shoving her in a cave and slamming a boulder in front of it held her for half an hour. Settling her down in a ravine with sides so slick it was impossible to climb out of managed to keep her for a full hour!

Yet she didn't try and escape, she kept up that placid smile and started cooking some food, and was now offering him tea. "Um… OK?" He accepted the cup and sipped it.

"Oh this is so exciting! I haven't had an adventure like this since that nice boy Kirin showed up! He was so smitten with me. It was too bad I had to let him down. Was already engaged you know." Kasumi said cheerfully as she drunk her own tea. "What about you Pantyhose Taro? Do you have anybody special?"

"Will you stop calling me that!" He shouted, his face red with shame at his cursed name.

"Oh! But that's your name! It wouldn't be proper to call you something else." Kasumi said in a completely oblivious tone.

If he wasn't convinced that she was an airhead without a thought in her mind he'd swear he was making fun of him. "Hurry up you freak." He muttered, looking off into the distance where he knew Akane and her Master would be coming from. "I want my new name." So focused on his goal he didn't even notice that Kasumi's smile had changed to be more of a smirk.


	4. Accepting it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranma Saotome & Akane Tendo vs Pantyhose Taro! Plus, Ranma learns a bit more about the perspective of another with a Jusenkyo curse

"The waterfall he mentioned is a fair bit out of town. We probably won't be able to make it today, so you have camping gear?" Akane asked

"Of course I do. How about we stop by my house to pick up my pack and tent?" Aiko said.

"That works."

"So… why does the guy call himself Pantyhose Taro?"

"That's his name. To put it simply my Master was given the honor of naming him and he decided that was the best name for a young man to have. I'll explain more as we hike. Needless to say, the guy's a jerk." Akane sighed as she remembered the trouble he had caused. "I still owe him for the trouble he caused **last time** he showed up and he pulls this stunt…"

A sudden loud clanging caught Akane's attention, and she and Aiko turned around to see that Soun had entered the room and dropped a large pile of weapons onto the ground.

"Uh, Dad… I don't think I need them…Dad! Don't put on the armor again!"

**Part 4: Accepting it**

"I'm home!" Ranma shouted, "Well, for a minute at least!"

Genma looked up from the newspaper he was reading. "Leaving again so soon boy?"

"Yeah. Can you get some of the camping stuff back out. Going to need it." Ranma said before dashing down to her room.

Genma wondered for a minute what his son was planning to do, It wouldn't be the first time a Saotome had suddenly needed to grab a pack and run out of town for a bit. But it usually involved more angry shopkeepers. With a shrug he pulled Ranma's old pack out of storage, shoving his personal tent and a few basic supplies into it before heading out the front door. Maybe there was a hint there.

The teenage girl and man with glasses were, he guessed, the hint. The girl was holding two large backpacks herself.

The girl looked up at him, blinking.

"There's a katana sticking out of your backpack." Genma pointed out.

The girl blushed. "Dad!" She complained.

"So, who are you two?" He asked.

"Oh. I'm Akane Tendo. I'm a friend of Aiko's." The girl bowed.

"Tofu Ono. I'm her brother-in-law." The man gave a little bow too.

So this was the girl who held the key to his son's cure. "Genma Saotome. Err… Aiko's told me about you." Honestly why did Nodoka have to get cute with a false name?

"And she'd mentioned some things about you." Akane said with a smile.

Genma snorted, "I bet. Nothing good I imagine."

"She called you a genius." Akane smiled, likely in memory of whatever conversation she had had with Ranma.

"Bah. Knowing my child it was the most insulting way to call someone a genius ever conceived." Genma said dismissively. "So what exactly is going on?"

"My wife's… she's been…" Tofu looked like he was about to start panicking, but a glare from the younger girl, "She's been kidnapped!"

"An enemy of my Master decided grabbing my older sister was a great way to get what he wants, the moron." Akane said, "About the only thing it's **going** to get him is a beating."

"Congrats Pops, now I know that there are in fact worst people to be students of then you." Ranma popped out of the house, wearing one of her hardier blue chinese outfits, holding her backpack. Genma noted wryly that she was wearing one of the bras that had been brought to help cement her cover.

"You bring shame upon me child!" He snapped.

"Look in a mirror old man if you want to find shame." Ranma said. "OK Akane, ready to go."

"Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Genma said to his son.

"I'll be sure to not do anything you **would** do either Pops." Ranma replied back.

"Nice meeting you Mr. Saotome." Akane bowed, and Tofu gave him a nod.

"So… why do you have a katana in your backpack?" Ranma asked her.

Akane blushed again, "Dad snuck it in, I think."

* * *

A few hours had passed, taking a train, getting off, and hiking through the wilderness for a few hours had been nice. Ranma still remembered the constant wandering that had characterized her childhood, and it seemed that Akane wasn't exactly a stranger to training trips. Tofu seemed to be the one carrying the bulk of the camping gear for the trip, Ranma figured it was a male ego thing. She knew if she was a guy at the moment she'd probably be insisting on carrying more.

Though, from what Ranma could tell Akane was capable of carrying all their packs, and them. At the same time. With one hand.

This was demonstrated when she casually pushed a fallen tree out of the way of the path. She "pushed" it by knocking it into the air and sending it sailing off into several other trees with a palm strike. Ranma raised an eyebrow at that, but Tofu didn't show any particular reaction. She wondered for a moment just how strong this girl was, and decided that when they finally got a chance to spar she'd find out.

Eventually the sun started to set, and Akane stopped at a clearing a short distance from the trail. "How's there sound?" She asked.

"Looks good to me." Ranma walked over and set down her pack, pulling out the tent and beginning the long practiced procedure of setting up her camp.

"Done this often?" Tofu asked, setting his own pack down and sitting down on a nearby rock.

"Traveled around wilderness for I think over half my life." Ranma answered, "Was homeschooled up until High School. So yeah, I know how to set up a tent." In the time she had spoken, she had managed to get hers up. "If you need any help…"

Tofu shrugged, "I used to do a lot of training trips out in the wilderness when I was a young martial arts student like yourself. I can handle a tent."

"Ack!" Both Tofu and Akane looked over to Akane. She had gotten out her own tent. In the process of setting it up she had somehow gotten the tent poles tangled around her, the elastic cords wrapping up her legs. With a thud Akane fell to the ground, "I hate this stupid thing!"

"It… takes Akane some time to set up camp." Tofu said diplomatically.

* * *

"So, what's with this pantyhose guy?" Ranma asked once she got the fire going and the three sat around it.

Akane sighed, "He's… he's difficult. Like I said, my Master was the one to name him. It's some silly law in his home village. He was bathed by him after helping his mother give birth, and by their law he named him… well, Pantyhose Taro."

"Uh… why?"

"The Master is perhaps the single most vile, perverted, hideous old troll to ever live. The world is a better place with him gone." Akane said.

"Right…" Ranma was beginning to want to meet Akane's Master, if only out of pure morbid curiosity. "What's this guy's name anyways."

"Hapo-" Tofu began, before Akane slapped her hand over his mouth.

"Don't say his name!" Akane hissed. "I'll write it down for you later."

"Come on now Akane, aren't you being a bit silly." Tofu said.

"My father spoke the Master's name **once.** In a week he was back and I had to suffer his perversions for two years." Akane said, "So no, not risking it. I'll write it down for you later Aiko. We should get back to talking about how to handle Taro."

"How good a fighter is he?" Ranma asked, "I mean, I guess the goal of this little journey is to beat him."

"As a Martial Artist... not that good." Akane said, "The real problem is that curse of his…" She frowned.

For some reason, the way Akane said curse set off alarm bells. "His… curse…?"

Tofu nodded, "Well, in his case I don't think he sees it as much of a 'curse', he's had it his entire life."

"Oh, hey, Aiko spent years in China. I bet she's heard of it." Akane said, "It's this place in China… a whole bunch of magic springs that give people that fall in them a curse, what was it called again?"

"Jusenkyo I believe." Tofu said.

Upon hearing that name, Ranma instantly turned pure white. She felt her heart jump out of her throat. "Ju-Jusenkyo… nope! Never heard of it!"

"Not surprised. Most people don't talk about it except to say to stay away from it." Tofu said.

"Anyways. The point is that, at birth, the Master bathed him in one of the magic springs. I believe it was called the… uh…" Akane glanced over to Tofu.

"It was called the _Níuhèmànmáorénnìquán."_ Tofu said, "Spring of Drowned Yeti Holding and Eel and Crane while riding an Ox."

"...wait what." Ranma said. What kind of spring was **that?**

"Trust me. Magic is weird." Akane said, "Anyways. With a touch of cold water he becomes some kind of towering flying monster thing. WIth tentacles. He got that somehow from a Spring of Drowned Octopus…"

 _Probably jumped in that spring too later._ Ranma thought. She remembered how early on she had spoken with the Jusenkyo Guide's daughter Plum on any sort of cure to be found at Jusenkyo itself. In particular she remembered hearing about the Spring of Drowned Man, wondering if that spring would cure her by "overwriting" the curse to turn into a girl. Turns out Jusenkyo doesn't work that way, and instead the curses **mix.** In the end all agreed that turning into a girl was better then turning into some kind of hermaphrodite.

"I think you should stay hidden Tofu." Akane said, "You can heat up some water and sneak up on him, change him back. Hot water reverses the change Once he's a regular human again we beat the crap out of him for kidnapping my sister and go home."

"What if he manages to avoid getting changed?" Ranma said.

Akane frowned, "We'll still beat him up. It'll just be harder. I've gotten a lot tougher since the last time he showed up. I bet I can take him. And I'm pretty sure you're at least as good as me, Aiko. The two of us can handle him."

"What about him?" Ranma pointed to Tofu.

The doctor grinned, "I'm not half bad, but my main specialties aren't much use against a giant monster."

Akane let out a yawn, "Well, with strategy cooked up, I think we should get some sleep. It's going to be tough tomorrow."

* * *

The day came, and Pantyhose Taro woke to the smell of someone cooking. He didn't have a tent, just a sleeping bag for when he slept in his human form, so he had wondered if his hostage would whine. Instead she hadn't said a word of complaint and now was, again, making breakfast.

She poured some rice and meat in a second bowl she had laying around, holding up the food to him. "Good morning Pantyhose Taro. I made breakfast!"

Taro muttered under his breath about how she wasn't a fighter in the slightest and it wouldn't be right to hit her. "Fine." He grabbed the bowl and started eating, keeping an eye on Kasumi.

"I do so love camping." Kasumi said with a gentle smile, "So many fun things I get to do!" Taro didn't notice that she wasn't looking at him when she said that.

* * *

Morning came, the camp waking up early.

"The waterfall is down this way." Akane pointed. She looked over at Aiko, "Now are you ready? This guy won't be easy if he changes."

Aiko grinned, "Don't worry Akane, I've taken on some **strong** guys."

Tofu stayed back, starting up a small fire to heat a kettle full of water. Aiko and Akane snuck forward, around ten minutes they spotted a small campsite. The camp was next to a river, a small waterfall falling down from a nearby cliffside a few meters away from it. There, Akane saw two people. Her sister, Kasumi, and Pantyhose Taro. Akane snarled at the sight of the young man who had three times now made her life more difficult. Stepping out from the trees, she called out to him. "Pantyhose Taro! Give me back my sister!"

Taro looked up and scowled at the sound of his hated name. Thankfully, from his perspective, Akane was a fighter and thus it was perfectly acceptable for him to pound her into the ground. "Well good morning to you Lil' Miss Butch."

"Hello Akane! You missed breakfast, I'm afraid." Kasumi said helpfully.

Taro stepped in front of Kasumi, "Listen here Butch, you're not getting your maid back until I have a new name."

Aiko jumped in front of Akane, her own expression dark. "Hey! Listen here pal, snagging people's sisters does not get you what you want. It gets you an ass-beating."

Taro glanced over at the new girl, "And who the hell are you?"

"Aiko Saotome. If you know what's good for you you'll back off, Pantyhose Freak!"

Taro's eye twitched, glaring at Aiko, before her turned back to Akane. "Humph. Whatever." He looked around, before smirking. "I see your _little_ boyfriend is missing. And you brought a new "friend" with you. Well, congrats Tendo, glad to see you finally came out of the closet."

Aiko's jaw dropped, her face turning red. "W-wh-what!?"

Akane just rolled her eyes. She had no idea if Taro was just taunting her, or if he genuinely believed she was a lesbian. It was hard to tell with him. (Not that Akane wasn't used to hearing some whispers. It wasn't her fault that she liked fighting, didn't care much for makeup or most girly things, kept her hair short, and so on. None of those things were any indicator of her sexual orientation and anybody who thought it was could stuff it.) She ignored his taunt and took another step forward, keeping Taro's focus on her. "Look, Taro, the old pervert isn't here. You're not getting a new name like this."

"Well then you can just turn around and go get him! She's not coming home until I have a good name!" Taro snapped childishly.

Akane muttered under her breath about how "Awesome Taro" was not a good name at all. "I'm not leaving without my sister, Pantyhose! So let her go before I have to hurt you." Before Akane could take another step towards Taro, he pulled out a bottle of water. He held it over his head in the manner one would hold a loaded gun.

"Not one step closer, or else I'm going to have to beat some humility into you."

"As if."

"Please, it took you, your beard, your crossdressing buddies, and the man who destroys compasses all together to beat me." Taro laughed, "And I'm even stronger now!"

Akane sighed, "Look, Taro, please stop this. There has to be a better way, but there won't be unless you let Kasumi go!" Taro's sneer made his answer obvious. So with a sigh of resignation, Akane took another step towards him. Taro laughed, and motioned to pour the water over his head. However, to his surprise no water touched him. Looking up at his hand, he realized that the bottle was no longer in his hand.

"What!?" Taro looked behind him, noticing that Kasumi was gone as well. Turning back towards Akane, he noticed Aiko **reappearing** next to her. A smug grin was on her face, holding Kasumi over one shoulder and the bottle in her other hand.

Akane was impressed, she had seen Aiko enter the same stance she had seen her use the previous day when she used the Umisenken to sneak past all those boys. Akane had known the technique was strong, but to be able to snatch someone out of someone's hands without them even knowing was at a completely different level.

Taro, noticing that his threat was now empty, took a step back. "Now wait a minute Tendo... " Akane started walking towards him… so Taro turned around and ran towards the river as fast as possible. Akane was faster, she caught up to him, grabbed him by his arms, and with a shout flung him away from the water and into a tree.

Aiko sat Kasumi down. "Hey there." Taro got up and started running towards the two.

"Oh hello, are you a new friend of Akane?" Kasumi asked as Akane jumped in front of Kasumi and punched Taro before he could reach the two.

"Yup!" Akane said, "Met her a couple days ago at school. She's pretty great. Oh yeah this is my older sister Kasumi."

"Nice to meet you."

"I… hate you…" Taro said, pulling himself off the ground and rubbing his bruised face.

Akane put her hands on her hips and gave Taro a good glare. "Well then, maybe next time you want a new name you won't be a **jerk."**

"Don't even think about running to the water pal." Aiko added.

Akane let out a little sigh of relief. She had been sure that this would involve a difficult fight. But instead thanks to Aiko the entire issue would be resolved quickly. "Now, if you apologize I'll-" Akane stopped talking as she felt something hit her head. Something cold.

Another cold impact hit her head, and Akane looked at the now cloudy sky. A raindrop hit her face, followed by another. Within a few seconds, a drizzle fell over the forest.

Taro smirked.

"Oh come **on!"** Aiko shouted in frustration.

* * *

From two years of having a Jusenkyo curse, Ranma was fairly sure the curse itself had a sick sense of humor. It often felt like the transformation would be timed to cause maximum embarrassment, annoyance, or pain. And as such, Jusenkyo weighed the scales, and found that letting Taro transform would cause more annoyance to all involved then not. Cologne said this was all something called "confirmation bias" on her part, but **she** wasn't the one with the curse. With the rain coming down, Pantyhose Taro made his change.

Ranma's eyes drifted up as he changed into a monster the size of a building. The first thought was that it was a massive winged minotaur, yet there were several things on top of that. Eight tentacles seemed to sprout of its back, twisting like they had a mind of their own. However, there was some things that Ranma didn't expect. Its arms and eel like tail were covered in shimmering green scales, its hands tipped with claws. Taro rose up to his full height, his wings flapping out, and released a loud bellowing sound, like a roar crossed with a cow's moo.

Flying low along the ground, he rushed towards Akane. Raising up his fist, he threw it down in a punch that could smash her into paste. Akane slid to the side, narrowly avoiding the newly formed crater. Several tentacles flung out at her, but Akane ducked under them and kicked several away.

That's when Ranma jumped into the fray, she kicked Taro hard in the back. The tentacles lashed out at her without him even turning around. "Gah!" Ranma jumped away from them, "Ugg slimy things." She muttered. She noticed that Taro was busy focusing on Akane **still.** This made her scowl. The monstrous jerk was ignoring her!

Ranma jumped up, landing on Taro's head. "Hey! Pantyhose jerk!"

Taro peered up at the new person on his head, with a growl he threw his fist at her. He failed to hit Ranma, but instead smashed down to top of his head.

"Wow." Akane said as Ranma jumped out of the way, "He actually fell for that."

Taro glared at the two people, rubbing his now bruised head. His tentacles lashed out, trying to grab the two. Both of them jumped in opposite directions, He swung his fists at Akane, but that just let Ranma kick him hard in the side. Taro growled, this wasn't working as he expected. Akane had gotten a **lot** better since the last time he had been around her, and her new friend was no slouch herself. Still, he hadn't played all his cards yet! He flew into the air, diving down at Ranma this time. Ranma jumped to the left, avoiding the impact, but that was expected.

What Ranma didn't expect was a thick black ink shooting out of the tentacles, drenching and knocking her down. The stuff was oddly sticky. It pinned her to the ground, the drizzle not washing it off quick enough. Taro grunted in satisfaction, turning his fist towards her. Ranma winced, raising her arms up to brace for the hit…

The blow never came, as Akane grabbed Ranma and jumped into the air away from Taro, pulling her away from the sticky ink. She was easily carrying her bridal style, Akane's brown eyes shone with concern, looking directly into Ranma's "Are you OK?"

Ranma felt her face heat up. "I… I'm fine…"

* * *

Tofu was glad he had the foresight to cover the fire pit before the rain started. Still, it would be a while before he could safely use the kettle. He could hear the roars and sounds of battle a short distance away.

"Tofu?"

"K-Kasumi?!" Tofu straightened up, keeping his focus. While he could generally stay sane around his wife now, if she caught him off guard there was still the impulse to do something silly. "You're safe!"

"Oh yes I'm fine." Kasumi gave him a gentle smile, "Akane and that new friend of hers are handling the situation.

Tofu frowned, "I'm guessing it's ending in violence after all."

"Oh yes." Kasumi said, "I don't think Akane minds too much." She looked up at the clouds, "The rain should be stopping soon."

"You think so?""

"You get a feel for this sort of thing, after a while." Kasumi said.

Tofu grinned and hefted the heated kettle, "Time for me to save the day then?"

Kasumi smiled, "I don't think you'll need to."

* * *

Aiko was surprisingly soft.

It surprised Akane, she would have expected Aiko to have some obvious muscles like she did. It had always bugged Akane, a little, that her lifetime of martial arts had left her with a fairly muscular body, lacking any sort of feminine softness. She was glad that she didn't get any bulging muscles, at least. Yet here was Aiko, nearly as strong as her yet still having a perfect feminine figure. Akane wondered how she did it.

"Ah… Akane…." Aiko mumbled, blushing. "Thanks… you can let me down now."

Akane felt her own face heat up, "I, uh... OK." She let go Aiko, setting her down as the rain washed off the ink. "Got to watch out for ink, by the way. Sorry about not warning you about that."

"It's… OK." Aiko muttered.

Akane turned to glare at Taro, the cursed chimera form growling, his tentacles writhing. "Pantyhose Taro!" She took a step towards him, "Keep your gross gunk… off my friend!"

Taro's eye twitched, he took flight again and charged at Akane, she matched his charge. This time she was ready. Aiko was behind her and she could see Kasumi a safe distance away. Reaching down her blouse she pulled out a firecracker like the one she had shown Aiko the other day. Taro's eyes widened, after all, last time he had come over she hadn't known **that** technique. " _Happo Fire Burst!"_ Akane shouted, throwing the small firecracker directly into Taro's face.

The explosion nearly knocked Aiko off her feet. Taro himself was blown back, slammed against the ground. Several trees near the edge of the clearing were knocked over, scorched black by the heat of the explosion.

"What… what the hell was that!?" Aiko said.

Before Akane could explain the terrible power of the formally sealed technique, she saw a jet of fire erupt straight towards them both. They leapt to the side, and Akane's jaw dropped as she saw Taro standing. He looked a little scorched, but didn't appear very injured. "What!?" The last time the Master had been able to knock him out with that! Now he could withstand it with ease. "How!?"

Taro snorted with smug satisfaction, smoke coming out of his nostrils.

Akane frowned, he had somehow become tougher by an order of magnitude, "Those scales!" They had to be some kind of natural armor. With a roar, Taro opened his mouth and another stream of fire shot out of it. With that, it hit Akane just **what** Taro had found to add to his cursed form.

"Oh come on!" Aiko shouted, voicing her realization and frustration, "Are you seriously telling me there's a Spring of Drowned **Dragon?"**

Taro's response was to somehow smugly breathe fire at them. He took to the sky again, ink shooting out of his tentacles and fire out of his mouth. He was clearly herding Akane exactly where he wanted her to be. Akane growled, throwing another Happo Fire Burst. This time he made it explode prematurely with a short burst of flame. He was still knocked back a bit, but this time he stayed in the air.

"Akane!" She looked to her side, seeing Aiko landing next to her. Aiko glanced over and grinned. "OK… I have a plan. Stick close to me, OK?" She held out her hand.

Akane found herself smiling back, "Sure."

Aiko nodded, and turned to Taro with a sugary sweet smile. "Ohhh Taro~"

Taro stopped his charge, his expression showing his confusion at this sudden change in one of his opponents demeanor.

"I was wondering, how about we go out to the mall after this?" Aiko said, her tone having completely changed to that a bubble-brained little girl.

Taro actually landed, staring at the girl and wondering what had gotten into her.

"I saw the **cutest** dress there the other day. I just know it would look **adorable** on you." Aiko said, her expression that of sunshine and puppies.

Akane gawked at her friend. Taro was stunned.

"We can paint our nails afterwards." Aiko said happily.

"Oh my." Kasumi said quietly in the distance, and that was the cue for Taro to snap.

Embers coming out of his nose, he roared and rushed directly at Aiko, his **fists** igniting. Aiko jumped out of the way, pulling Akane with her. The punch made a even bigger crater then the last one.

"Oh, and then we can stay up all night. Eating ice cream and watching some romantic movies!" Aiko continued to speak. "We'll be the best girl-friends ever!" This, if anything, made Taro even angrier. His tentacles started spouting flame, yet Aiko didn't make any offensive move. She kept dancing around his attacks, holding onto Akane and leading all three combatants in a circle.

Taro growled, he wanted nothing more than to crush this irritating little brat! Yet she didn't have the decency to hold still and die. Plus she just would not shut up!

"Oh. Perhaps we could go on a date, afterwards." She said, sweetly. Taro froze at that, date…?

"After all… we both know you need a Beard."

The entire universe seemed to freeze. Then, Taro erupted in a rage he hadn't felt before in his life. Akane gawked at Aiko, just what on earth was she planning. She stood there, grinning as the raging chimera rushed them both. Akane was ready to move, but she saw a spark in Aiko's eyes. A confident smile… it was like she had already won. So she stood by her friend, truststing her for the moment. Though she did clutch her hand a little tighter.

Taro was almost on them, smoke and fire pouring off him. looking more like a demon than anything else. Tentacles and fists converged on the two girls, and Akane was ready to move out of the way. Then Aiko made her move, throwing up her fist in a spiraling uppercut. She met Taro head on.

" **Hiryu Shoten Ha!"**

A tornado appeared around them. In an instant, Taro was caught in it. The "Rising Dragon Blast" trapping him and battering him at all angles. Taro roared, shooting out flame in an attempt to force his way out of the tornado. That didn't seem to have any effect, and if anything Akane noticed the winds seemed to get stronger. She and Aiko were in the eye of the storm, somehow untouched by the raging winds around them. "Ready?" Aiko mouthed to Akane, who nodded, her own victorious grin forming. Still holding hands, the two of them jumped. Aiko letting them be carried up by the winds she controlled.

The sailed over Taro, suspended in the air for the briefest of moments. He noticed them, and his eyes narrowed, but couldn't do much else as several rocks gathered by the tornado hit him.

"Good night…" Aiko began.

"Pantyhose!" Akane finished. The two dived straight down, their feet impacting his cow face. He was driven to the ground, the tornado fading as the source of the heat quickly and painfully slammed into unconsciousness.

Akane jumped off Taro, glancing over at Aiko. "Aiko… that… was… **awesome!"**

Aiko couldn't help but puff up with pride, "Yeah, it was. I figured he'd be a big enough hot-headed idiot to use it. Plus, you know, the fire."

Akane nodded, getting a basic understanding of the technique from standing in the middle of it. She looked up, "I think you cleared out the rain."

Aiko looked up, the clouds were indeed gone. "Hah! Awesome!"

"Goodness me."

Aiko and Akane glanced over to see Kasumi coming out of the forest, Tofu beside her.

Tofu had an eyebrow raised at the devastated landscape that was once a picturesque river shore. He examined the unconscious Pantyhose Taro, and turned back to his wife. "You were right. They could handle it by themselves."

* * *

The first thing Taro felt as consciousness returned to him was hot water hitting his head. "Ahhhggghnnnn…" He moaned, every part of his body hurt.

"Are you ready to discuss this like a reasonable human being?" Akane's unhappy face loomed over him.

"God damn it…" Taro muttered, how could he have lost **again.**

"Now now, Akane. No need to be angry." Kasumi said, leaning over him and placing a warm wet towel over his forehead.

He noticed the new girl, Aiko, was just smirking at him. Taro growled, he would make her pay later. "He isn't acting reasonable Akane, I think we need to hit him again."

Akane sighed, "Don't worry about that yet Aiko. Especially since Tofu just paralyzed his limbs with pressure points."

The doctor chuckled at Akane's announcement.

Taro found, to his discomfort, that this was correct. "Great." He muttered. "Not like it doesn't hurt too much to move **anyways.** Got to humiliate me a little more don't you."

"Well it's not like Akane didn't try to talk things out first." Kasumi said, standing behind Aiko.

Wait.

Kasumi was standing behind Aiko… but Kasumi was also standing over him, tending to his wounds.

Aiko noticed it too, and Taro voiced her confusion with his own.

" **Why the hell are there two of you!?"**

Akane growled and slapped Taro on the side of head, making his pain just a little worse. "What do you mean 'why'? You're the one who cursed her!"

"Cursed?" Aiko said.

"What the hell are you talking about!" Taro said.

"Last time you tried to get your name changed. You brought that cursed water? It spilled all over Kasumi!"

Taro blinked, he remembered the water spilling, but not it hitting anybody. "Wait that doesn't make sense. Why isn't she like a priest then?"

Akane showed great restraint in not beating him again. "Because it was water from the Spring of Drowned Twins, you idiot!"

"Wait are you saying that was in the water I brought… is that why you tried to stop me?"

" **Yes!"** Akane shouted, with the tone of one who saw that someone had finally got it.

Taro growled, "Why the hell didn't you tell me!?"

"We tried!" Akane growled back, "But you didn't listen! You're always like that Taro! You can't help but be an ass and refuse any help or any attempts to talk!"

"You're cursed!?" Aiko said to both Kasumis.

Taro's eyes widened in realization. "That… that's how you were able to always get out of whatever I tried to tie you up with, you had help!"

The Kasumi above him nodded, "Oh yes. When you first grabbed me, I managed to discreetly get some cold water on me, I always carry a spare set of clothing for such a need. From there it was so much fun playing with you Pantyhose Taro."

Taro felt his eye twitch. "Oh… oh god damn it all." She had been messing with him the _whole time._ He made a mental note to never underestimate Kasumi Tendo again. He sighed, "OK, so when is the old freak going to come out and laugh at me."

"Ah, err… you see, Taro… that's part of what I wanted to talk to you about." Akane said, "First off, Kasumi doesn't live at my house anymore. She's married and lives with her husband.

Taro glanced up at Tofu, "Well, congrats. You're living the dream of men everywhere." He said, glancing over at the twin Kasumis.

Akane slapped Taro on the side of the head, "Don't be a pervert."

"Ow I'm injured here!" Taro grumbled, "OK fine, so kidnapping her was a bust."

"Second…" Akane frowned, "You see, the Master is… gone."

Taro didn't like the sound of that. "Gone?"

"As in, buried. I should know, I took care of it myself." Akane said .

Gone. Happosai was gone. Happosai was dead and buried.

"I… he… I can't… ever… get my name changed. The freak is…!?" Akane nodded. Taro took this information in, took a few deep breaths to try and calm down. It didn't work.

He burst into tears.

"Nooooooo! It can't be that! I'm stuck with this stupid, awful name **forever!"** He sobbed openly, leaving Aiko looking rather uncomfortable. "Damn it all!"

"Taro… Taro!" Akane grabbed his shoulders, "Listen! I think I can still help you."

Taro looked up at her, with teary eyes. "How?"

"I have an idea. Just stop crying, apologize to Kasumi, and agree to **behave** and I'll help you, OK?"

Taro sniffled, "Oh.. fine." What did he have to lose?

Akane smiled, "OK Tofu, you can undo the pressure points now."

* * *

Ranma found herself in the back of the group as the hike towards home began. Her eyes were currently locked on two, three technically, people. Kasumi and Taro.

They had Jusenkyo curses, just like her.

Taro didn't seem to mind his much. Then again, Akane had told her he had been cursed his entire life. Ranma supposed that if she had been swapping sexes since the day she was born she'd be used to it and not mind it. That left Kasumi, who from what she could gather had only gotten the curse around a year ago. How had she been dealing with it? Was she looking for a cure? Ranma supposed she didn't have the advantage of an oracle pointing the way. Obviously kissing Tofu hadn't done it. She wondered, for a moment, just what was it about Akane that would cure her. She dismissed the thought as magic just being weird.

"Hey, Kasumi…"

The one currently not talking to her husband turned back to look at her. "Yes, Aiko?"

"Ah, um… about the curse…"

"What about it?"

"Doesn't it bug you? I mean… being split in two like that can't be good for the head. Are you looking for a cure?"

Kasumi smiled, "Oh it's not that big of a problem. It's not near as complicated as that. As for a cure… Tofu searched around for one, for a bit. But he couldn't find any, and I don't really think it's worth the trouble."

"But, you're cursed! Every time water hits you you're… you're…" Ranma shivered as memories of when she was first cursed. That fear of losing her identity, the strange and **different** sensations that being female had given her. She still remembered the complete emotional breakdown Shampoo and her mother had guided her through when she learned that to her horror she got _periods._

"Oh, it's a little inconvenient, yes." Kasumi said, "But it has its advantages, you know. I'm never late for an appointment since I can be in two places at once, studying and learning is so much easier too!"

"If you say so." Ranma mumbled. It suddenly occurred to her that she hadn't really thought about how different the curse made her for some time. She was currently dressed as a girl, even if the "dressing" at the moment consisted of wearing a bra and panties with her usual outfit. Everyone around her thought she was one. In fact, Ranma realized, if Kasumi hadn't brought the subject up, Ranma would have barely noticed she was a girl until it was time to change.

Two years of having it had made the change almost unnoticeable in Ranma's mind, if she wasn't thinking about it. She hadn't changed at all, there was not a single bit of an "act" that existed. She was Ranma, acting like Ranma would. "Aiko" was just the thinnest of masks. She wasn't acting like she thought a girl should act, yet nobody doubted she was one.

Did that mean the curse had affected her mind?

She groaned as she cursed her father's idiocy for thinking up this plan. Then she cursed her own for going along with it.

Akane slowed down to match Aiko's pace, "Hey. That technique, the Hiyru Shoten Ha, that was great!" Her eyes sparkled and her smile was bright. Would Akane be giving her that smile if she knew that she was a man? "That another Saotome School trick?"

Ranma found herself smiling back at Akane. "Hah. Nope. That's one that Granny taught me…" The two friends continued to talk about martial arts throughout the hike.

* * *

The next day they found themselves back at the Tendo Dojo. Taro had become pensive, wondering just what Akane had planned.

"We're back!" Akane announced as they passed the front gate, in an instant Soun was there. He hugged Kasumi, sobbing.

"My little girl, you're safe! Oh thank you thank you!" He said, before suddenly noticing Taro. "You!" He was suddenly looming over him, his eyes aflame and his countenance demonic. " _How dare you hurt my precious daughter!"_

Faced with the wrath of an angry father, Taro did the only thing he could. He got down on his hands and knees and shouted. "I'm sorry I'm sorry!"

"Now now Father." Kasumi put her hands on Soun's shoulders, "Taro apologized and I'm not hurt. So calm down."

Soun's anger faded, "Well, if he's truly sorry…"

"Well then. Now that I'm back, come on Tofu. We should get home."

Tofu nodded, "See you later Akane."

Akane waved bye to her brother-in-law. Soun sobbed a little about how they should stay a bit, but Kasumi insisted they had work to do. Ranma was quickly realizing that the Tendo household was one in which the women were in charge.

"Now then, follow me Taro." Akane said, Ranma trailed behind the two as they entered Akane's house. They went into a large room on the first floor, the door itself was… weird. Ranma noticed the several dozen spiritual wards taped onto it. Akane pulled open the door, and Ranma was assaulted by the strangest room she had ever seen. Ranma knew what magic felt like, and this room was full of it. Artifacts and scrolls were scattered around the room. There was also underwear, piles upon piles of women's underwear. Akane marched in, unconcerned, searching near the back of the room. "Where is it… ah!"

Akane pulled out a small box from a pile of bras, "Here it is." She headed back to Taro and opened the box to show it to him.

Ranma looked over his shoulder, it was a _jitsuin._ An official stamp used for signing documents. "This is…?"

"This is the Master's Seal. He obviously doesn't need it anymore so…" Akane pulled out piece of paper started writing.

" _I, Happosai, being of sound body and mind, hereby declare as my last Will and Testament that the one known as Pantyhose Taro henceforth be named-"_

Taro's jaw dropped, "That…"

"Well? What do you want your name to me?"

"Y-You know what I want!" Taro said.

Akane sighed and finished the sentence, writing down " _Awesome Taro."_ She then dipped the seal in ink and put it down. "Here. Show this to the people in your village. I suggest you not mention how you got it."

"This… this…" Awesome Taro said… " **Thank you!** Thank you oh god thank you!"

"I know it's probably not… well, really legal, but at this point I think it's the best you can get."

"I'll take whatever I can at this point. If the letch is really dead and gone then hell, it's not like any other way will work! Thank you!" Taro grabbed Akane into a hug, and actually _kissed her._

"Hey!" Ranma grabbed Taro by the back of his collar and pulled him off her, "Show your thanks some other way!"

Akane grumbled about boys, but didn't seem too mad. Especially since Taro was so busy dancing around in joy now. "I suggest you, uh, stay out of Japan from now on. It'll probably be best to avoid getting caught."

"R-right… still… thank you!" Taro laughed gleefully, running out of the room and out of the house, leaving Ranma and Akane.

"Well, uh, glad that's over with." Ranma said.

"I'll say." Akane said.

"Why'd you help him anyways? He's an ass." Ranma asked.

Akane shook her head with a smile, "Yes. He is. But seriously Aiko, _Pantyhose Taro_. I'd help anyone with his problem. It's just the right thing to do." She looked around, "Now then, where's that scroll…"

"Scroll?"

"You know, the one I was going to let you see the other day?" Akane pulled out an old looking scroll. "Here it is." She held it up to Ranma, a grin that looked rather mischievous on her face.

"Oh! That! Great!" She grabbed the scroll, remembering just how powerful that technique had been. "Let's see…" Ranma rolled it open, examining it closely.

Frowning, Ranma flipped the scroll over. It didn't help. She tilted it to the side, nothing. Held it right up to her nose, examining it closely. Nothing. "This the **worst** handwriting ever!" She shouted. "I can't read this at all!"

Akane just giggled.


	5. Black and White with Red

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranma meets Akane's **other** friend. You know. The one with the crazy laugh.

Unfortunately, Ranma hiding away Akane for a fight didn’t dissuade the boys of Furinkan. Their reaction the following Monday was to charge closer before Ranma could grab her. Unfortunately, for them at least, this made them funnel through the school gate. This provided a convenient chokehold for Akane to bowl them down even faster than usual.

 

Throughout the following week Ranma was glad that he seemed to have settled into school. A few boys tried to ask her out, she turned them down. The ones who he recognized as members of the group trying to attack Akane every morning got threatened with violence. Not wanting two beatings in one day, they learned to leave him alone.

 

A few girls seemed a little jealous of this new girl suddenly gaining the friendship of the most popular girl in school. Ranma meanwhile boggled about how every other female took the morning attacks in stride. They just seemed to accept it as part of the school experience.

  
It was lunch time now, and the two had decided to eat lunch outside, under the shade of a tree out in the field. Ranma had to admit, she was drooling over Akane’s lunchbox. She wasn’t a half bad cook herself, having learned to take pressure of Nodoka while on the road and growing to enjoy it, but Akane seemed to have the perfect lunches. Ranma opened her mouth to ask about trading some dishes.

  
“Prepare yourself Akane!”  
  
Then a girl with heavy wooden mallet dropped out of the tree.

  
The Most Beautiful Woman in the World

  
Part 5: Black and White with Red

 

With a loud thud the mallet hit the ground where Akane had been sitting a moment earlier. Ranma threw up her lunch in shock at the girl who had appeared seemingly out of no where.  “Ack!” She caught the lunchbox, then stretched her arm out to catch the lunch.  
  
Akane, meanwhile, was dodging blows from the new assailant. Ranma noticed the new girl looked familiar, though she couldn’t quite place where she had seen her before. It finally came to her when the Akane knocked away the girl’s hammer and in response she pulled out gymnastics ribbon of all things. She was one of the girls in that picture Ukyo had shown her on the first day! Akane dodged the whip like attacks Ranma dug through her memory, trying to find the off hand point the girl’s name had been mentioned! Akane grabbed the ribbon and tugged the girl towards her, but she managed to avoid getting hit by one of Akane’s punches.  
  
“Ah!” Ranma clapped her hands together, the name coming to her, “Kodachi!”

 

“Huh?” Kodachi turned around at the unexpected calling of her name. This proved to be a mistake, as Akane grabbed the ribbon, hog tied her, and hung her upside down on the tree in the space of a second while she was distracted.   
  
“I win!” Akane said cheerfully, letting down Kodachi after securing her victory.

 

“So you do, again. One of these days I shall best you.” The girl untangled herself from her own ribbon.  
  
“Uh… hi?” Ranma said to her. She wasn’t used to seeing **other** people randomly attacked by martial artist rivals.  
  
“Who are you anyways? To be so familiar with me…”  She was suddenly in Ranma’s face.

  
“Ah, uhh, well…” Ranma stepped away from the girl whose eyes were narrowed at her. “It was a picture, you had with Akane…”  
  
“You’re being awfully familiar with her too.” Kodachi said.  
  
Akane put a hand on Kodachi’s shoulder, “Hey, this is Aiko Saotome. She transferred over a week ago.”   
  
In an instant Kodachi was all smiles, “Oh I see. Being helpful to a new student, that’s just like you dear. So, how have you been?”  
  
“Oh, you know, I’ve been fine.” The two chatted for a bit, catching up on some minor events. “I’ve been hanging out with Aiko mostly.”

 

“Really now?” Kodachi gave Ranma another suspicious glare. Ranma found herself glaring right back. What was she doing? They both plastered on smiles as soon as Akane looked at them. “So you’ve been to busy to visit?” Ranma’s eyes widened when she remembered another particular tidbit of information about Kodachi. Namely, whose sister she was.  
  
Akane frowned, “I’m sorry Kodachi, but, um, I haven’t exactly been in the mood to visit your house.”

 

Kodachi looked a little surprised, “Really? After two weeks I would have thought this would have been resolved.” She noticed that both Ranma and Akane looked a little confused, “Um… wait. Akane, dear, my brother says that there was some kind of spat over a misunderstanding. What exactly **did** happen?”  
  
Akane’s face was split into a scowl. “A **misunderstanding**? Is that what he’s been telling you?” Akane then began to, in greater detail than Ranma had heard before, tell Kodachi exactly what happened that lead to the break up. As the explanation went on Kodachi’s expression became more and more outraged. By the end of it a full blown battle aura was glowing around her.

  
“That.. that idiot! I swear I shall give that foolish brother of mine the greatest thrashing of his life!” Kodachi raved, “He will not sleep until he crawls to you and begs forgiveness!”

 

Akane put a hand on Kodachi’s shoulder, “Don’t. Just… let it go.” She looked a little tired, “I just don’t want to deal with it. Honestly, I hadn’t even **thought** about Tatewaki the past couple days. I’d rather just, you know, get over him.” She smiled, “So, what are you doing here instead of at your school?”  
  
“I skipped classes today, obviously.” Kodachi answered.  
  
This made Akane giggle. “Well, if you’re not too busy, do you have any lunch? We were just about to eat.”

  
Kodachi frowned, “I did not bring any food with me.”  She looked around, “You there, go buy me some bread.” She pointed at Ranma.  
  
Ranma raised an eyebrow, “What? Get it yourself.”

 

This made her scowl, “Excuse me? You should be honored just being allowed in our presence.”  She glanced down at the lunchbox by the tree, “Ah. It seems somebody left behind some food.” She had a nasty grin as she threw out her ribbon and grabbed Ranma’s lunch.  
  
“That’s mine!” Ranma snapped, grabbing the box before Kodachi could pull it into her hands. “Go get your own lunch!”  
  
Akane sighed, “Kodachi.”  
  
“Yes Akane?”  
  
“You’re doing it again.”  
  
Kodachi suddenly gained the appearance of a child being scolded, “Oh.. um…”  
  
“Go get some bread and we can have lunch together.” Akane said, patting Kodachi on the back.

 

Kodachi nodded and quietly walked off.  
  
“Sorry about that.” Akane said to Ranma, “Kodachi was basically raised by servants and didn’t really have any friends before me. She’s just used to bossing everybody around. She’s gotten a lot better, most of the time.”

  
Ranma sighed, sitting down on the grass. “She’s your ex’s sister, right?”  
  
“Yeah. Made friends with her when I went over to their house. I, uh, haven’t visited recently.” Akane sighed, “She’s a nice girl once you get close to her. I even managed to break her of the habit of attacking rival gymnastic teams before the match.”

 

Ranma raised an eyebrow at that.  
  
“Long story.” Akane said, opening up her lunchbox again. “She helped me out a lot with cooking, I used to be **awful.** ”

  
Ranma laughed, “Really I’ll have to thank her, that stuff looks great.” Suddenly throwing out her chopsticks, she quickly pulled a piece of tonkatsu out. “Here, have some yakitori in return.” She poked some of her chicken into Akane’s mouth, grinning.

  
“Aiko!” Akane shouted through a full mouth. “Don’t!” She swallowed the yakitori and skewer.   
  
However, she was too late, Ranma had already put the pork into her mouth, chewed, and swallowed. “Mmmmm man this is gre-” Then she froze in place, unmoving, chopsticks held up and a grin on her face, though her eyes were showing panic. Slowly, Akane reached over and poked Ranma. She tipped over, still frozen in that pose.  
  
Then Kodachi returned, curry bread in hand. She stopped and looked over the scene, Ranma tilted on her side in a sitting position, Akane looking over her with worry. “She ate some of your lunch, didn’t she.”  
  
Akane sighed in defeat, “I tried to warn her.” She looked over her paralyzed friend, “You see, um, Kodachi taught me how to cook and she has some… **habits.”**  
  


Kodachi laughed loudly, a hand covering her mouth, “Ah my cooking is meant for stronger people than most! If they can’t handle a little paralysis powder, maybe some hallucinogens, then they clearly don’t deserve my efforts.”   
  
“I have to focus to make stuff that’s safe for other people. I’m immune so I can just relax while cooking for myself, but that means only me and Kodachi can eat them...” Akane said, “So, um, sorry. I don’t think we should trade lunch dishes Aiko.”  
  
Ranma couldn’t say anything in reply.  
  
Kodachi sat down next to Ranma picking her up and leaning her against a tree. She then opened her curry bread, “Shall we have lunch now dear?”  
  
Akane picked up Ranma’s lunchbox, closed it and sat it in Ranma’s lap. “OK, fine. How have you been Kodachi?”

 

* * *

  
  
Luckily, Ranma managed to recover around two minutes before lunch ended. That was more than enough time for her to eat in a rush.  
  
“It **was** good.” She said after school to the apologetic looking Akane. “Before, you know, I couldn’t move. And heard music for some reason.”  
  
“That would be the hallucinogens.” Kodachi said. “You should be grateful, before I took her under my wing, Akane here was simply dreadful. Unable to even boil water.” She laughed, “Oh imagine the awful expression on your face if you had eaten some of her old cooking!”  
  
Akane was blushing now. “I, well…” She mumbled some apologetic comments as they walked out of the school gates. The moment Kodachi stepped out, a trio of spotlights lit up, shining down on all three of them.  
  
“What the hell…?” Ranma muttered.

 

“So here you are, hiding amongst the plebeians, Kodachi Kuno!”

  
“That voice…” Kodachi said.

  
Ranma squinted, trying to see through the bright lights that had been set up.  
  
Propped up in the middle of the sidewalk was a portrait of a smug looking blonde woman. Then the portrait started laughing, and Ranma realized it was actually a woman holding a picture frame to make it it **look** like a portrait of her.

  
An older butler was suddenly by her side, picking up the frame so she could walk towards the trio. “Well now, I think you’ve been given enough time, Kodachi! It think it’s time to settle things!”

 

“Asuka… Saginomiya” Kodachi yelled. “What are the likes of you doing here?”  
  
“Kodachi, Kodachi. Did you forget?” Asuka was now right up in their faces. “Our wager?”  
  
Kodachi suddenly paled, “Th-that?”  
  
“Yes, that!” Asuka said, smirking. “The wager, set all those years ago. I have found the perfect boyfriend, so how about you, Kodachi?”  
  
“O-of course I do!” Kodachi said.

  
Ranma leaned over to Akane, “You have any idea what’s going on?”  
  
“Not a clue.” Akane whispered back.

  
“So where is he?” Asuka asked.

 

“He’s… not in town at the moment, I’m afraid. How about I call you when he arrives?” Kodachi said, hopefully.  
  
This set the blonde off, laughing and leaning forward. The butler tilted the frame so that it looked like the imaginary portrait was tilting with her. “Oh yes. I see how it is.” She pulled out a microphone and the spotlights shifted to focus on her, “You’ve failed, Kodachi Kuno! Victory is mine!”

  
“N-no! He’ll be here!” Kodachi snarled, “Listen here, Asuka, I swear on the Kuno name he’ll be ready for a date!”  
  
Asuka frowned, “Humph, very well then, you have one hour, Kodachi Kuno.”  
  
“Two.” Kodachi said.

  
“Two it is, until then, adieu!”  She turned away and left, laughing. A work crew carrying away the spotlights and the butler still holding the frame.

  
“Uhhh.. what was that?” Ranma asked.

  
Kodachi shrieked. “Akane! What am I going to do! We need to find him!?”  
  
“Him?” Ranma said.

  
“Oh don’t you know anything!?” Kodachi snapped at her, “My love! My sweet darling Ryoga!” She pulled out a photo, shoving it in Ranma’s face. It was the guy in a bandanna Ranma had seen in Ukyo’s photo, making him the last member of Akane’s group of friends. “He’s away, on a noble pilgrimage throughout Japan!”  
  
“He is?” Akane murmured, “I thought he was lost.”  
  
“So he’s your boyfriend, but he’s not here? What does that have to do with anything?” Ranma said.

  
Kodachi regaled them her tale, telling of the challenge (in grade school), offered, and how it seemed that Asuka had decided it was time to collect. Ranma was slightly reminded of Pink and Link and the trouble **they** had caused. It seemed that a skeleton in Kodachi’s closet was coming out, and Ranma had a feeling that Kodachi was going to get Akane involved.

 

“We need to find Ryoga!” Kodachi said, “He has to be around, right, Akane?”  
  
Akane frowned, “I did get a post-card from him a few days ago. It was from Sapporo.. though he said he was in Nagasaki…” Akane shook her head, “I don’t think he’s anywhere near us Kodachi.”

  
“What’s a guy doing sending you postcards like that?” Ranma suddenly asked.

  
“He’s a friend, he likes to send souvenirs.” Akane answered off-handedly.

  
“So… what can I do? I need a date in two hours.” Kodachi started pacing around, “If it isn’t my dear Ryoga, it needs to be a convincing substitute…”

  
An idea dawned onto Ranma. This was a good opportunity! She’d claim to “know a guy”, probably say a cousin, and say “he” could substitute for a date. This way he could introduce his male side in a safe way. Someone who “Aiko” trusts, not doing anything directly to Akane. She could just see how he’s a stand up guy helping out! And since Kodachi has a boyfriend, there’s no risk of any real romantic entanglements  “Hey, I have an idea.” Aiko spoke up, “How about-”  
  
“You’ll help?! I mean, of course you’ll help!” Kodachi said, interrupting her.

  
“Y-yeah. It’s like, I-”  
  
“Well, I suppose you’ll do. Have to get you dressed.” Kodachi said.

  
“Huh… wait! What!?” Aiko said.

  
Kodachi looked a bit surprised, “You did just offer to pretend to be my date so I can defeat that smug Asuka once and for all, no?”  
  
“No! I was suggesting a guy I-”  
  
 **“Are you suggesting I cheat on my love!?”** Kodachi suddenly shouted.

  
“Uh, no.. and how is going on a pretend date with me any different?” Ranma asked.

  
“You’re a woman, obviously you don’t count.” Kodachi answered matter-of-factly.  
  
Ranma opened her mouth to protest that when Akane patted her on the shoulder.  
  
“Look, it’s bound to be the quickest way. We need a date, and it’s just for some bet, right?” Akane said, she was grinning.

  
“But I’m… well… look at me!” Ranma jabbed down at her chest, “I don’t look like a boyfriend!”

  
“I think I know of someone who can solve that problem. The miscreant chef and her boyfriend.” Kodachi said. She grabbed Ranma by the arm, “Come, you’ll make yourself useful! To the okonomiyaki shack!”

 

* * *

  
  
“Kuonji!”  
  
Ukyo looked up from her grill. Kodachi had burst into the restaurant, dragging Aiko behind her, with Akane following behind. “Afternoon Kodachi, what’s up?”

 

“I need you to make this prole into a man.” Koadchi shoved Aiko in front of her, leading to some customers to stare. Aiko looked back and glared at Kodachi.

 

Ukyo flipped an okonomiyaki off the grill, passing it to a customer. “You want what?”   
  
Akane stepped up, “It’s like this Ukyo…” Ukyo listened as Akane explained the latest trouble Kodachi had dragged her into. Ukyo sighed, looked back over at Kodachi, and then at Aiko. “Uh, could you come at a better time?”  
  
“I think we know whose time is most important here!”  Kodachi snapped. “I have two hours to prepare!”

 

Ukyo groaned, “Honestly, why did come to me?”  
  
“You’re the only transexual I know.”  Kodachi said flatly.  
  
Ukyo blinked, before slapping her forehead. _“Transvestite,_ Kodachi. The word you’re thinking of is transvestite.”

 

“Does the word really matter? You know how to make a woman pass as a man, no?” Kodachi said.

  
“Please Ukyo? We’ll pay you back in some way.” Akane asked.

 

“You just want to see Aiko dressed up don’t you.” Ukyo asked flatly.  
  
Akane grinned, “Guilty as charged.”  
  
“Don’t I get a say in this?” Aiko asked.  
  
“You did volunteer.” Kodachi said, to Aiko’s grumbling.

  
“OK, fine.” Ukyo said, “Konatsu?” She called out, her partner stepping out of the shadows. Clearly having been enjoying observing the conversation.

 

“Yes, Ukyo?” Konatsu asked.

 

“Take over the grill for a bit, K?”

 

* * *

 

 

Ranma was pulled upstairs, apparently Ukyo lived with in a small apartment about the restaurant.   
  
“So, you want to know the number one trick to looking like a man?” Ukyo asked as she shut the door behind Ranma.

 

“Uh, be one?” Ranma suggested.  
  
Ukyo snickered at that. “Well, I guess that’s one way.” She opened up a dresser, pulling out a tape measure. “Take off your blouse.”  
  
“What!?”

 

“I got to take your measurements, if we’re going to dress you up, you need fitted clothing.” A grin formed, “Plus, I’m totally going to make Kodachi pay for all of this.”

 

“Uh… OK.” Ranma said, pulling off her blouse. She was grateful, at least, that she had managed to put her foot down with and get only plain utilitarian underwear.   
  
“Thanks.” Ukyo began circling the tape measure around her, taking some notes and nodding.   
  
“So, uh, you dress up as a guy sometimes?” Ranma asked in between the prodding.  
  
“...sometimes, yeah.” Ukyo said, “Why you ask?”  
  
“Uh, just wondering about it.” Ranma said, “I mean, err-” After all, Ranma was pretending to be a girl out of some necessity.  
  
There was a pause, as Ukyo digested her words. “Well, you heard Akane the other day, right? I get better rent deals.”  She went back to measuring.

  
It took a few minutes for Ranma to realize that Ukyo hadn’t actually answered the question, just echoed what Akane had said. By then, though, she had picked up a phone and was calling someone. “OK then, since this is a fancy date, you’ll need a suit.” She said as she hung up. “Come on, we’re going out.”

 

* * *

  
  
Akane felt a little bad for Aiko when she was dragged out of the restaurant by Ukyo. She wondered what sort of outfit Ukyo would cook up for Aiko. Akane had to admit, she had seen her friend pull off some impressive feats. Very easily taking on the appearance of a handsome young man, rather than the lady Akane knew she really was.

  
She took a bite of the okonomiyaki Konatsu had served her, Kodachi was giving him a very specific order. Finally, Kodachi finished and sat next to Akane, looking a bit stressed out. “So, who is this Aiko girl really?”  
  
“She’s a new student, met her a bit more than a week ago Kodachi.” Akane said.

  
“Hm… just in your hour of need, she shows up out of the blue. Yes, I see…” Kodachi murmured, looking down as her own okonomiyaki was dropped in front of her. “...ready to get close. Yes I understand now.”  She then started talking to Akane about various other topics, the two friends catching up.  
  
Akane had first met Kodachi when she first visited Tatewaki’s house around two weeks after she started dating him. She had been rather aloof at first, but Akane wasn’t one to give up on making a friend. After a couple visits and even spending some time just with her, Kodachi turned around. Soon they were close, and Akane felt like she was a good influence on her.  
  
The two started catching up on how things had been since they last met up. Soon enough Akane started telling the story of her latest encounter with the former Pantyhose, now Awesome, Taro.

  
“And so there we were, Taro was really ticked off breathing fire everywhere but Aiko was just standing in the middle of it all!” Akane was getting a little animated in her retelling, Konatsu plopped third okonomiyaki down, she started eating it without thought, “And then she-”  
  
“We’re done!” Ukyo announced, having returned from where she dragged Aiko to.. “By the way, Kodachi, you **owe** me.”

 

Aiko re entered the restaurant, and Akane’s jaw dropped.  
  
Ukyo had gone above and beyond the call of duty. If Akane didn’t know better, she’d say that a very cute young man had just walked in behind her. First, somehow she had managed to hide Aiko’s figure behind the dark grey suit. She didn’t have a tie on, with the top button undone. Her hair, which Akane had seen previously in a normal ponytail or a pigtail to the side, was instead tied back in a low ponytail. She walked in confident and grinning., “Hey Akane, how do I look?”

 

Akane felt her face start to heat up. Aiko made a very good boy, it seemed. “Well, you, um, look like a guy!”  
  
This made Aiko grin even wider, “Great!” She walked closer to Akane and she couldn’t help but noticed that Aiko even walked like a man. How had Akane never noticed how differently men and women walked until Aiko started **strutting**.  She sat down next to Akane, “Man, this is the most expensive piece of clothing ever, thanks Ukyo!”  
  
“Thank Kodachi, she’s paying for it.” Ukyo said with a grin.

  
“I’m what Kuonji?!” Kodachi snapped, the two began bickering over the issue of paying for the suit.  
  
Akane tuned out the argument, Ukyo and Kodachi always found something to argue about. Instead she kept looking at Aiko.

  
Akane had never been a big fan of macho men. Her childhood crush on Tofu (which died a gentle death when he finally found the nerve to ask Kasumi out when Akane was fourteen) had helped shape her tastes. In her opinion, guys who tried to be super manly just felt childish and immature. That had been part of what attracted her to Tatewaki, he had never been overbearingly macho despite some of his quirks, and had always expressed complete confidence in himself. In hindsight, Akane was wondering if he was **too** confident.  
  
“Akane?” Aiko said, “You OK?”  
  
“S-sorry. Spaced out for a minute, you look great Aiko.” Akane mumbled. _I’m not like that!_ She thought, _I’m not interested in girls!_ Her mind drifted back to how it had felt back in the mountains for that brief moment. Holding Aiko, being closer to her, holding her hand. Her face reddened furthe _r. This has to be some dumb rebound thing!_  Akane nodded to herself, that made sense. She wasn’t exactly happy about her love life, and then she makes a new friend who’s a massive help for this difficult time in her life. Then, she comes in dressed up and manages to pull off looking like her type of man. That brief confusion was coming from that.

 

“Well, while you lack the rugged handsomeness of my love, I suppose you’ll do.”  Kodachi said, her nose upturned.

  
Aiko just smirked, “No way any guy’s hotter than me.” Akane let out a giggle at hearing that.

  
Kodachi seemed less amused, “You were surprisingly fast Kuonji. We have an hour to prepare.” She stood up, “It’s time to prepare for battle!”

 

“I thought this was a fake date for a bet.” Aiko said.

 

“With Asuka Saginomiya it shall be war!” Kodachi said, “I have no doubt about it.” She slammed her fist on the counter, “No matter what dirty trick she tries. No matter how she cheats, I, the Black Rose, will conquer it!”

 

“Riiiighhht.” Ukyo said, “Can me and Konatsu watch?”

 

“Oh it should be fun! Maybe we could dress up too Ukyo and make it a double date!” Konatsu suggested.

  
“No.” Kodachi said flatly, “No double dates with you two. Ever.”

 

* * *

  
  
“I’ve brought him!” Kodachi announced to Asuka, who was again waiting outside Furinkan.  
  
Asuka took one look at Ranma, her eyes narrowed. “Flowers? Wouldn’t a boyfriend bring his date flowers to the date?”  
  
“Ah.. err…” Ranma said, “They’re just…” Konatsu pushed a bouquet into Ranma’s hands behind her back. “Here!” She pulled out the roses. “Here you are, uh, dear.”  
  
“Why thank you _darling.”_ Kodachi took the roses. “Well we must be off on our date now, ta-ta Asuka!” She held out her arm, and Ranma got the hint and took it. They side stepped the obvious pit trap Asuka had set up, Kodachi leading Ranma to wherever the date had been set up. Akane, Ukyo, and Konatsu trailed behind them.

 

Left behind, Asuka clenched her fists. “Oh, it’s not over yet, Kodachi. If you think your pretty boy date will defeat me.. you’ll be sorely disappointed!” Her butler came up, holding a cell phone. She dialed on it.

 

* * *

 

 

Ranma found herself being pulled into a restaurant that she was pretty sure was unaffordable by anybody making a sane salary.  Once there, Kodachi did the ordering. Drinks were placed in front of them. Ranma opened her mouth to try to make small talk.

 

“What, exactly, are your designs on Akane?” Kodachi said.

  
“H-huh?”  
  
“I am not blind, nor foolish. Aiko, **if that’s even your real name. T** here are exceptional people in this world, my dear friend Akane is one of them. As with all great people, there are hangers on, like Kuonji. Plus, there are the schemers and plotters, those who wish to use the great ones, or to bring them down.” Kodachi took a sip of her drink, smiling pleasantly. “So, which is it?”

 

“I-it’s nothing! We’re just friends!” Ranma said. Yet her heart was starting to pound in her chest, the way Kodachi was looking at her…  
  
“Please. I guess I’ll have to use other methods to expose your plot.” Kodachi said, “Now then-”  
  
That’s when their battle instincts went off, and both of them jumped off their chairs. Just in time for two waiters to smash heavy mallets onto them.

  
“I’m so sorry Sir, Madam!” One of them said quickly, “We slipped, you see.”

  
“While carrying giant wooden mallets.” Ranma said.  
  
“They’re actually steel painted to look like wood, but yes.” The other said.

 

“Very well. Fetch us new chairs.” Kodachi ordered. The two waiters scrambled, and soon enough there was a new set. They both sat down, only for a minute later the chandelier above them to crash down on the table.  
  
“I’m so sorry! I guess they forgot to maintain that one!”  
  
They were moved to a new table, and finally the food game. Ranma tried not to drool, because it smelled delicious. The plates were sat down in front of them…

 

And promptly exploded.

  
“Sorry Sir, Madam! I don’t know how the bombs got into the meal!”  
  
 **“My new suit!”** Ranma yelled. “You almost wrecked it!

  
The two waiters looked at each other, frowning. “That’s odd. You should at least be unconscious.” One said.

 

“Miss Saginomiya won’t be happy about that…” The other said.

  
A now annoyed Ranma cracked her knuckles, “Oh that is it!”

 

* * *

 

  
Leaving the restaurant, without paying or eating of course, Ranma was surprised to see Akane kicking a guy in the face. “Hey Aiko!” Akane waved. “These guys were talking about ruining your date so we decided to help out.”  
  
Ranma noticed Ukyo and Konatsu knocking out a pair of guys too.  
  
Akane frowned, “Uh, Kodachi, shouldn’t you be eating lunch anyways?”  
  
Kodachi growled, “You missed some, dear. They blew up our lunch.”  
  
“Ah-ha!” Asuka sprang out from behind a mailbox. Konatsu, who had been standing by the mailbox, jumped back in surprise. “I see, you can’t have a proper date with your so-called-boyfriend, you lose Kodachi!”  
  
“Asuka!” Kodachi shouted, “I see, yes, sabotaging the date so you win by default. It’s a cunning, evil plan, one that I’m disappointed in myself for not thinking of first.”   
  
Asuka laughed wildly, her butler holding up his hand over her mouth. “Indeed. I guess this the end, I win our little wager.”  
  
“Not yet! I demand to see your boyfriend!” Kodachi said.

 

“Humph. Very well.” Asuka whistled, “Come here my darling!”  
  
There was a moment’s silence.  
  
“I said, **come here.”**  
  
“Oh! Sorry dear…” And from the shadows out came a very handsome man. His long hair blowing freely in the wind. His shirt slightly unbuttoned and a rose hanging from his pocket.

  
Kodachi and Ukyo’s jaws dropped. “My God he’s hot!” Ukyo said.  
  
Akane glanced back to Ranma, but she didn’t really notice, “Uh, he’s nice looking yeah.”  
  
Ranma frowned, “Hey! I’m way sexier than that bozo.”

  
Konatsu glanced over at Asuka’s boyfriend, looking him up and down, “Hello there Sir!”  
  
“Why hello young lady.” he said, in a smooth and silky voice, pulling out a rose and handing it to Konatsu.

 

“I was just wondering… when did you start dating Miss Saginomiya?” Konatsu asked, innocently.  
  
“Why just recently. Love at first sight you know.”  
  
“I see. Yes, and does your family approve?”  
  
“Why of course! She’s a very kind and gentle girl.”  
  
“And your boyfriend, does he know you’re cheating on him?”  
  
“He’s- I… what!?”  The man stumbled back in shock.

  
Ukyo gasped, “Konatsu’s gaydar is unmatched! So, that guy’s really…?”  
  
Konatsu pulled out a microphone, “Admit it, you were hired by Miss Saginomiya to pretend to be your boyfriend, weren’t you!?”  
  
“How did you-” Asuka shouted, before getting interrupted by Kodachi’s laughter.

  
“It would see, Asuka, that I am the winner after all! No boyfriend for you, after all.” Kodachi continued to laugh. Ranma and Ukyo both winced at the sound. Akane, who was more used to it, just sighed. “Go! Go back in tears, knowing that the Black Rose has beaten you!”

 

Gritting her teeth, Asuka stomped her foot and glared at Konatsu. “I will never forget this! The White Lily will have her revenge!”  She stomped off, the fake boyfriend shortly following.

 

“So… are we done here?” Ukyo asked.

  
“I no longer need your services yes.” Kodachi said, before turning to Akane.  “Thank you Akane!”  
  
Akane smiled, “Well, you’re welcome… though it was really more Ukyo and Aiko…”  
  
“Perhaps I could come over and visit soon? Until then, adieu!” Kodachi waved to Akane. However, as she was leaving she leaned over to Ranma  “We’ll continue our conversation later. I will **not** allow your schemes to continue.” She said in a low voice Ranma couldn’t hear.   
  
Ranma swallowed nervously, before Akane put a hand on her shoulder. “Well, thanks for that Aiko.”  
  
Ranma got a smile to come up at Akane’s words. “You’re welcome. It wasn’t… really wasn’t any problem.”  
  
“You do look good in that, you know.” Akane admitted.  
  
“Good to hear, it was almost ruined.” Ranma sighed, “Wish I could, you know, actually go on a real date with this. It’s too fancy to wear casually.” She looked at Akane, smiling with a simple happiness. The image of Akane on a date, with Ranma wearing this suit, only fitted to the proper male body. Akane herself in a lovely dress, flitted into her mind. Her face turned red, “It’d… it’d be nice.”  
  
Ranma didn’t notice Akane suddenly turning a bit pink. “Well, you know… maybe some day!” She laughed and bounded ahead, “I’m going home how, see you!”  
  
“Yeah... “ Ranma waved, “See you tomorrow Akane.”

 

* * *

 

  
“Welcome home dear, it’s-” Nodoka stopped as she noticed Ranma’s attire. “Um, son?”

  
“Long story.”  Ranma said. “Don’t worry Pop, I didn’t have to pay for it. No mom, I didn’t steal it.”  
  
“Well it’s quite a nice gift, pity it’s not fitted for your proper body.” Nodoka said, before getting back to cooking.

  
“So how’s it going boy? You got that girl to want to date you yet?”  
  
Ranma rolled her eyes, “No Pops, I haven’t had a chance to let her meet my guy side yet.”  
  


“It’s been nearly two weeks boy! When I was your age I had the ladies falling-” Genma was interrupted by Nodoka bopping him on the head with a frying pan.   
  
“Ignore him Ranma. Why, I remember him following me around like a lost puppy for a month before working up the courage to ask me out.” Nodoka said with a smile, “These things take time. I’m sure that, Akane’s her name right, will love you once you get things set up right.”  
  
“She’s still not screaming about hating men right?” Genma asked.

  
Ranma shook her head, “No, there’s idiots but she isn’t blaming our gender anymore Pops.”

  
“Good! Maybe if you ask her out now you can catch her on the reboun-” Genma was interrupted by Ranma’s foot impacting his face.  
  
“Stuff it Pops! I’m not going to take advantage of Akane like that! I’m just… I’m just…”  
  
“Just going to sweep her off her feet!” Nodoka squealed.

  
“Yeah, that. I guess.” Ranma muttered. “Anyways, going to go change now.” He walked over to his room.  Once inside he sighed, slumping down onto his futon.  
  
  


 


	6. An Invitation to Trouble

The waves beat against the rocky shore. The cool dawn light casting sharp shadows upon the jagged rocks. Slowly a figure emerged from the churning surf. Clinging desperately to land, the figure let out several hacking coughs. Slowly, painfully, it pulled itself to shore. Hacking and coughing, the figure spat out sea water. It stood up, and looked determinedly to the land beyond.

Then a large wave smashed into the figure and pulled it back into the sea.

Several minutes later, the figure manages to crawl back onto land, this time moving out of reach of any waves before standing up. Pulling the crabs off it, the figure looked determinedly, again, to the land beyond.

"Saotome… I need to find… Saotome…"

 

**Part 6: An Invitation to Trouble**

 

"Ranma." Akane's voice was husky, practically purring. In the flickering candlelight Ranma could see that what she was wearing left little to the imagination. A almost transparent nightgown, with underwear that was more lace than anything else. On her hands and knees, she sauntered over the massive bed they were on. The swaying of her hips promised many happy things as she was quickly leaning over Ranma. "You're so beautiful." She cooed, stroking a hand across Ranma's chest.

It was this sudden sensation of Akane's hands brushing against breasts that made Ranma realize that he was currently a woman. "A-Akane...?"

"Shhh… you don't need to say anything." Akane said, leaning in closely. Their lips touched and Ranma felt like magma was erupting in her .Her arms instinctively went up, pulling Akane down closer to her. She was suddenly desperate to press Akane's strong body against her own. Akane's hands began to roam, brushing lightly against parts of Ranma's body no other person had ever touched.

Ranma moaned into Akane's mouth, gasping for breath once the beautiful young woman finally pulled away. "Akane…" She breathed out, "I… I…"

"You don't need words Ranma." Akane whispered, her breath burning Ranma's neck.

"I.. I need hot water." Ranma said, suddenly realizing that for what they were about to share, Ranma needed to be a man. "Hot water… ah!" There on the nightstand was a steaming kettle. She quickly grabbed it, and upended the pleasantly hot water over her head. "There we… huh?"

Ranma looked down at herself. She hadn't changed back.

"Silly Ranma." Akane cooed, "Remember? I just kissed you. You're cured!" She wrapped her arms around Ranma's shoulders, "You'll never have to be that stupid  **man** ever again." She leaned into kiss Ranma once more.

It was at this point that Ranma's eyes shot open and he leapt clean out of his futon, the radio clock on his room saying it was Four A.M.

* * *

"There's more!? Akane, isn't this enough?"

Akane let out a long sigh. Men could be such babies. Her father, a master martial artist who she knew was incredibly strong, was whining about having to carry some bags as they went shopping. "Daddy, if you want to eat for the next couple days, you'll carry the bags." She honestly didn't know how Soun had survived before marrying her mother.

Maybe he had just gone from living with  **his**  mother to living with his wife.

"Come on dear, isn't this enough?" Akane heard another voice down the road. A voice she had heard before. Looking across the street she saw a man and woman about her father's age going through their own shopping trip. Akane instantly recognized the gi wearing man as Genma Saotome, Aiko's father. He was trailing behind kimono wearing woman with a long wrapped bundle in her hands. Genma, meanwhile, was carrying a shopping bag. She slid across to the other side of the shopping district, smiling. "Hello Mr. Saotome!"

Genma looked up from his grumbling to look at Akane. It took him a moment to recognize her. "Ah, yes. Akane Tendo, right?"

Akane bowed lightly at him, "Right." She looked over the woman he was shopping with. A pleasant looking woman, dressed formally in a kimono while carrying a long bundle of some kind. Akane could quickly see the resemblance to Aiko. She mentally placed her friend beside the woman, and they were almost mirror images of each other. "Hello, I don't believe we've met."

The woman smiled brightly and returned Akane's bow. "Oh yes, pleased to meet you. I'm Nodoka Saotome. Aiko has told me so much about you."

"Hmmm… Akane?" Soun crossed the street, bags still in hand. "Who are you talking to?"

"Oh! These are Aiko's parents." Akane said.

Introductions were made, and Akane had to marvel at once thing. For the longest time she had thought her father odd for how he would spend most of the time in a gi. His wardrobe was more than two thirds gi. Now, here was another man who seemed to share Soun's "fashion" sense.

"Your daughter had been a big help for Akane." Souns said, "Just last week, she… she…" the tears started coming. "She saved Kasumi!" Soun then began telling a story about how she and Aiko had fought Taro. Of course, he was not there, and Akane had not told him any details. As such the story had little connection to reality.

For one thing, Akane was pretty sure that Taro did not have the power to summon demons.

Still, she saw Nodoka's smile grow wider as Soun continued his story. FInally he finished, "And she's been such a good friend for Akane. She'd been going through some hard times and Aiko there helped her out so much!"

"It wasn't that big a deal…" Akane mumbled.

Nodoka however, squaled. "Oh goodness! You're such a brave young lady!" There was an appraising look on Nodoka's face as she looked up and down Akane with a wide grin. "I'm so glad my child met you, Akane."

Akane blushed, "Thanks Mrs. Saotome."

Akane of course, could not guess what was going on inside Nodoka's head. Namely, Nodoka was examining the girl and making pleased conclusions on Akane's suitability as a girlfriend for her son.

"Well I did train my child to be the best!" Genma boasted.

Soun chuckled, but the gleam of parental pride formed in his eyes. "Well, I don't know Saotome. My dear Akane is not lacking in talent."

"My heir trained for years in remote corners of the world, learning from the greatest masters in the world.' Genma boasted.

"Greatest huh? Mine and Akane's Master was up there in greatness, at least in Martial Arts skills. And Akane  **surpassed**  him." Soun said.

"That's nice dear, Aiko is a wonderful martial artist after all, you did a good job." Nodoka interrupted the friendly father posturing and patted her husband on the shoulder.

Genma blushed a bit under his wife's praise.

Soun chuckled, "No matter, even if she wasn't so talented, any friend of Akane's is a welcome sight." Soun looked thoughtful for a moment, before turning to Akane. "Say, Akane? How about we invite the Saotome's over? A chance to get acquainted over dinner?"

Akane's eyes widened at that. Her friend's family? At her place for dinner? Having to cook for so many people… it would be tricky, and potentially dangerous. She didn't think she had faced a challenge like that before. "Ummm…" That's when she remembered, "Nabiki's visiting on Friday for the weekend, right? We could ask Kasumi to come over too." That way Kasumi could help with the cooking.

"Oh that sounds lovely!" Nodoka said with squeal. "Right, Genma?"

Genma, one never to turn down food offered nodded. "Sounds great. So, Friday then Tendo?"

"Yes. I think Seven would be good?" Soun looked over to Akane, who nodded.

"Aiko's been to my house before, she can show you where it is." Akane bowed to the Saotomes, "I hope you'll be able to enjoy our hospitality."

Nodoka returned the bow, smiling at the polite girl. "Thank you very much for the offer."

* * *

Today was Ranma's day off, as far as he was concerned.

Namely, today his plan was to be a man as much as possible. The temptation to be a girl, to become "Aiko" again was growing stronger. After all, if he was a girl then he could spend time with Akane.

Akane was quickly becoming an addiction. Spending time with her was invigorating in a way he hadn't felt around anybody else. Her smiles, her laughter, simply watching her practice her martial arts was an experience. The two had only done a handful of light practice sessions, not having the time for anything heavier with the piles of homework teachers were throwing at them.

Not to mention the dreams. It felt like every other night the spunky girl slipped into his sleep. Some of the dreams were innocent, involving her kissing him and curing him of the curse. With last night's dream being especially bad, and was what had driven him to take this "day off" as it were.

Waking up from  **that**  nightmare, a jumbled mix of arousal and fear, had been what made him decide that today he'd be a man, even if it meant not spending any time with Akane.

Why couldn't Cologne have told him about the cure two years earlier? Did he really have to spend the two years in Nǚjiézú? He had run the numbers, and had guessed that perhaps if he had learned of the cure right at the start he could have headed here when Akane was sixteen.  **Before**  she started dating that jackass Tatewaki Kuno. Maybe he could have met her first, gotten to date her first, then he'd be cured without this bizarre half-lie and they could...

Ranma's face turned red at the thought of actually being in a relationship with Akane. Before he could ponder any more he stepped to the left, narrowly avoiding a housewife watering the plants at her fences gate. "Have to try harder then that Jusenkyo!" he said quietly. That had been the fourth random cold water source he had expertly avoided. Ranma felt a grin come over him. Had, after two years, he finally figured out how to control these random splashes? With confidence, Ranma continued to walk forward.

That's when he felt the familiar cool feeling, followed by a sudden adjustment of his perspective as his body became her body. Turning to the  **right** , she saw an old woman with a ladle, ritually cleansing the sidewalk in front of her house. She glared at the woman.

"Oh, Aiko, is that you?"

Ranma looked behind her and saw that Kasumi had turned the corner and approached her. "Oh, hello Kasumi."

"Good Afternoon Aiko. What brings you here?"

"Huh…? Just wondering…" Ranma mumbled.

"Oh that's nice." Kasumi said, noticing Ranma's wet shirt, "What happened?"

Ranma jerked a thumb at the old lady, now having finished her washing was heading inside. "Hit me with water on accident."

"Oh dear. That happened to me once." A glint formed in Kasumi's eye, "It was a bit more embarrassing for me then some wet clothes."

Ranma's eyes bugged out at that. "Oh… oh geez. That must have sucked."

"I've gotten very good at dressing quickly." Kasumi admitted.

The mental image made Ranma blush. Kasumi was a very pretty woman, after all. He could also see the resemblances to Akane, maybe if she hadn't gotten into Martial Arts she'd have a figure just like-

"Guugtah.." Ranma forced that train of thought dead.

"Aiko?" Kasumi asked, "Is something wrong?"

Ranma shook her head, "No. It's nothing, really." She paused, realizing that there wasn't much harm in asking her about this. "Actually, hey uh, can I ask about Akane?"

"Well, I don't see why not." Kasumi held up a wrapped package, "I was just going to bring a lunch over to Tofu, we can chat a bit on the way." She walked ahead of Ranma, who trailed slightly behind her.

"So, uh, do you know about what kind of guys Akane likes?" Ranma asked, a little nervously.

"Hmm…?" Kasumi said, "That's an interesting question." She smiled, "Know anybody you want to try setting her up with?"

"Errr…"

"Well, to answer your question, I guess Akane's never been a particularly boy crazy girl." Kasumi chuckled, "All in all I can think of only two men she's liked. Tofu, and Tatewaki."

"Wait… Tofu?"

Kasumi nodded, "Oh yes. She had a crush on Tofu for  **years**." A nostalgic laugh came out. "She tried her best to get his attention. She knew he was interested in me, so she tried to imitate me. She even grew her hair out longer then mine."

"Wait, she used to have long hair?" Ranma tried to picture with Akane with long hair. It… just didn't seem right.

"Oh yes." Kasumi shook her head, "Then the day came that Tofu asked me out on our first date. Poor Akane. She cried quite a bit, and when I came back from the date I found she had cut her hair off herself. It was quite a mess I had to fix."

There was a brief lull in their conversation, before Ranma found the strength to bring up the other man in Akane's life. "And the other guy… Kuno?"

"Ah, yes, Tatewaki." Kasumi frowned at this. "I've always wondered about that. He and Tofu are superficially similar, I suppose. They're both strong martial artists, and both treated Akane very gentlemanly. I suspect Akane was attracted to his confidence, similar to what Tofu has. Of course, his is much more brash as expected of a teenager."

"There's a 'but' in there." Ranma said.

"Yes." Kasumi shook her head, "I have to wonder if he did a good job of hiding his more negative traits from Akane, or if she simply missed them somehow. That confidence, I saw, often crossed the line to arrogance. Much of it unwarranted. He respected Akane, I suppose, in a sort of old fashioned gentlemanly way. but I could tell he saw himself as a sort of paternal protector to her. Akane's always valued her independence and strength… but Tatewaki, I often felt like he saw having such a strong young woman as girlfriend was a sign of his manliness, that he had 'conquered' her."

"And then came the mess with him cheating on her." Ranma looked down at her shoes.

"Yes. That. His arrogance was full blown there. I'm convinced the boy thinks he's done nothing wrong. After all, a manly man naturally attracts lots of women, right? Why shouldn't he indulge? They all love him why can't he love them back? I'm sure that's his thought process."

"I.. see."

"I can't say if Akane's interested in dating again any time soon. If you do know anybody you think she'd like, I'd be careful about it." Kasumi answered, "I don't think she can take any sort of betrayal again."

"Y-yeah… I agree." Ranma mumbled.

"Oh look! We're here, you want to come in and say hi to Tofu?" Kasumi asked as the two arrived in front of a small clinic.

* * *

"I'm home." Ranma announced.

"Welcome back Son." Nodoka called back, "I have a kettle heating on the stove."

"Thanks…" Ranma entered the kitchen to see Nodoka preparing dinner and sure enough, a kettle.

"I know you have bad luck sometimes with water." Nodoka said, checking the rice. "Oh yes, get some of your nicer clothes ready for Friday, we're going out."

"Eh? Where'd Pops get the money for a restaurant?" Ranma asked, her voice changing to his voice mid sentence with the application of hot water.

Nodoka gave a gleeful squeal. "Oh don't worry about that! You see, I met Akane today while shopping with Genma. She's such a sweet girl. She invited us to dinner at her house!" Ranma could see the stars in her eyes. "We'll have to make a good first impression. After all, I might be calling her Daughter one day!" She resuming cooking, humming and skipping in place.

"Riighht…" Ranma said. "Uh, sure thing Mom."

* * *

So Friday came, another school day passing by.

Today Ranma and Akane were the ones assigned to clean up the classroom before heading home.

As Ranma cleaned the whiteboard, another student came in. "Saotome?"

The two looked over to the guy, "Yeah?" Ranma asked.

"There's someone out in the schoolyard looking for you, we think."

"You think?" Ranma asked.

"Well, he's grabbing people and screaming your name, when he sees they're not you, he lets them go."

"That's… different." Akane said.

Ranma, meanwhile, had a sense of deja vu about the description. "Oh… oh boy. Come on Akane, let's go check this out."

* * *

The school grounds were surrounded by higher then usual concrete walls. A product of one of the Principal's schemes. Which, combined with the narrower gate, meant that entering and exiting the school was often a pain if one left at the same time as everybody else.

The morning battles with Akane wasn't helping either. As such, Furinkan High tended to have the students come and go in waves, to minimize congestion to avoid the dreaded haircut tardy punishments.

Today, the third ending wave was being interrupted by the presence of someone standing in front of the school doors, was a man.

Akane stepped out of the doors, looking around for the person mentioned. That's when he struck! He grabbed her by the shoulders, shoved his face straight into hers, and spoke with a desperate tremor. "Saotome!"

Akane blinked, staring into the unfocused man who had grabbed her. He was tall, chinese looking. With very long black hair, he was wearing long white robes. "Ummm…"

He shook her for a sec, "Saotome? This isn't Saotome...again? Damn it! Where are you!" He let Akane go.

That's when Ranma's book-bag hit him in the side of the head, knocking him. "Mousse you big moron!" Put your damn glasses on!"

"Owwww…." Mousse pulled himself up, digging through his robes, he pulled out a thick pair of glasses. He put them on, peering over to Akane. "Uh, sorry Miss, I was looking for my friend-"

"You'd have an easier time finding me if you, you know, could see!" Ranma jumped in front of Akane, "The hell are you doing here anyways?!"

Mousse blinked behind his thick glasses, "Saotome? The hell? Why are you dressed like that?"

Ranma looked down at herself, "This is the school uniform." She answered.

"Yeah but why are you-" Mousse was interrupted by the sheer force of Ranma's glare.

_"I'll explain later."_  He heard Ranma hiss quietly in Tuhua.

"Aiko? Akane asked, "So he is a friend of yours?"

Mousse turned over at Akane, then back to Ranma. "Aiko?" he mouthed. Ranma just glared at him again.

"Yeah Akane. This here is Mousse. He's a friend of mine from China." Ranma explained.

"Pleased to meet you." Akane bowed, giving him her best smile. "I'm Akane Tendo."

"Uh, likewise." Mousse returned the bow.

"So what  **are**  you doing here?" Ranma asked, cutting to the point.

In an instance Mousse slipped back into panic mode. "It's awful! It's a tragedy! A crime of the highest level Saotome!" He began flailing around, "It's… it's… it's Shampoo!"

"Shampoo…?" Akane asked.

"What?" Ranma felt a stab of fear, "Shampoo? Did something happen to her? Is she hurt? Did-"

**Crunch.**

The conversation was halted, as the three of them gazed to the source of the sound. A crack had appeared on the thick wall to the east of them. "What…?" Akane said.

Another  **crunch**  followed. Then another, as a twisted web of cracks formed in the wall. Finally, it exploded outward. Rebar and concrete scattering.

The dust cleared, and a woman was standing in the newly minted hole. A young woman in a light blue qipao. Her long hair hung freely around her. She took a step forward, her head lowered.

"...Shampoo?" Ranma said, finally.

Shampoo's head snapped up, her eyes narrowed. A scowl on her face. If she heard Ranma, she gave no indication. Her gaze was focused directly at one person. "Mousse."

"H-hey Shampoo. I see you.. caught… up…"

Shampoo pulled out a massive dao. "I kill!" She screamed.

The next instant Mousse was no longer standing in between Ranma and Akane. Taking up the space he had previously done so was the dao and the massive gouge in the ground it had created.

The students who had been watching the drama were stunned. They hadn't even seen Shampoo move! Shampoo wasn't deterred by the miss. She Mousse had jumped back, but was now pressed against the wall. With a growl she charged again, a flash of the blade's light being the only evidence that anything existed in the space between. Mousse danced to the left and right, narrowly avoiding being part of the new chunks torn out of the school and grounds.

"Shampoo!" Mousse cried out, ducking another decapitation attempt, "Can't, we, uh, be reasonable about this!" He managed to, finally, slip away from the wall to more open space.

Shampoo growled in response to her prey getting away, even briefly. "No talking stupid Mousse! You insult Shampoo, you bother Shampoo, you get in Shampoo's way and disrupt Shampoo's life for  **last time!** " She held the sword up high, "Now.. die!" Shampoo moved again, bring the sword down to finally put an end to this insult.

Only for her blade to be stopped.

"What…?" Shampoo blinked. She looked down the length of the sword, to see… a pencil? Her gaze traveled over the pencil, to the Japanese schoolgirl holding it.

"That's enough." Akane said evenly. "I don't care why you're mad at this guy."

Shampoo frowned, who was this girl? To stop her swing… and with something so small and fragile… what did she use? Still, Shampoo was not going to let this girl, no matter tricks she knew, stand in the way of her vengeance. "Move."

Akane shook her head, "No."

"Move or Shampoo make stupid girl move." Shampoo growled.

"I guess you'll have to make me." Akane said in response.

"He stupid boy. Why you stick up for him, you no even know how stupid and annoying Mousse be."

"I'm not going to stand there and let you  **kill**  someone." Akane snapped in reply.

Shampoo sighed, stepping back and putting away her dao. "Fine. Shampoo not feel sorry for silly girl when beaten up."

"Go ahead." Akane said, crouching into a fighting stance.

Then Shampoo  **moved**. The heavy sword no longer weighing her down, even slightly. With the speed of one who had learned the Chestnut Fist, her hands were no longer visible. One hundred punches in an instant, Shampoo finally jumped back, growling in frustration.

It was that damned pencil again! She had somehow deflected each punch with it! It was clear she needed more power. She charged in again another sequence of impossible strikes. This time, however, her punches were meant to force an opening. Having spotted it, she threw in a knee blow, aimed at Akane's gut. This was swiftly revealed as a mistake, as Akane rolled with the strike and finally attacked. A lightning fast hammer blow, it struck Shampoo in the chest and blew her back. She slammed against the abused school wall. Wincing as she realized that hit would leave a bruise. Then her eyes widened as she realized what that meant. This girl was strong enough to, with a single blow, actually hurt her!

Shampoo didn't have much time to ponder this, as Akane was suddenly in Shampoo's face, launching more of those painful blows. Too close to dodge, Shampoo had to block with her arms. Each strike rattled her arms, but Shampoo had felt worse punches before. Gritting her teeth, she blocked a painful kick with her own leg, throwing a single finger into the concrete ground under Akane.  **"Bakusai Tenketsu!"**

The ground under Akane's feet suddenly exploding threw her off. Akane stumbled, her eyes wide with surprise. This was the opportunity Shampoo had been waiting for.  **"Geimon Tessen Shi!** " The five finger strike hit Akane in the chest hard. The crowd gasped as Akane was blown back. She slammed into the ground and bounced twice.

Gritting her teeth, Akane jumped up. "That… hurt, I have to admit."

Shampoo growled, "Give up now or hurt worse.

"Hah! No way. Not now." A feral grin was on Akane"s face. One that Shampoo recognized. The excitement of a strong opponent. Crouching low briefly, Akane began her own charge.

However, Shampoo was ready. Planting both her legs to the ground, she took a deep breath.  **"FREEZE!"**  The shout echoed, and Akane was momentarily stunned by the cry. Which was what Shampoo needed. She slapped her hands together, before throwing her arms out widely.  **"Kijin Raishu Dan!"**

Akane was bombarded by shockwaves, more and more of the school grounds being carved up. However, before Shampoo could even think of capitalizing on the blow… a battle aura blew the rubble away.

Akane stepped forward, the massive aura condensing into a cold blue glow tightly wound around her. She did not look particularly hurt. Had she used her battle aura as some kind of shield? She didn't seem unusually tough, she could see scratches from where shrapnel had hit her.

Desperate times called for desperate tactics. Shampoo reached behind her, and pulled out a large cloth.

To her surprise, Akane's eyes widened. Shampoo didn't stop to think about that, perhaps the girl was familiar with some iron cloth technique. She slipped into the stance, she needed to strike from every angle. I am calm. I am quiet. I am the cool surface of the sea… She repeated the mantra to herself, an attempt to get into the proper mindset for the Way of the Silent-

**"Happo Fire Burst!"**  Did she just throw a firecracker at me? Shampoo thought, before it exploded in her face.

The cloth Shampoo had been carrying did not survive the process.

Akane approached the crater.

"Agggg…." Shampoo winced, every part of her  **hurt**. She pulled herself up, glaring at her opponent. "Bombs? Really?"  
  
"It's not really a bomb." Akane said, peering over the edge. "Aiko!" She called out.

Aiko? Shampoo thought, and then familiar looking person peered over the edge to. Wait.. that's…

"Uh, Akane?" Ranma said. "Are…"

"I thought you said that Saotome's' were the only ones allowed to learn your School!" Akane said.

Shampoo blinked. "What?"

"Ah, err. Shampoo's an exception." Ranma admitted, "She, uh, basically Pops had to teach her to pay our way in her home village."

"Oh." Akane sounded a little jealous.

"Wait Japanese girl recognize Quiet Thief?"

"Yeah, you wanted to see the Yamasenken? Well, Shampoo just used some of it."

"Wow it was impressive." Akane said.

_"Ranma!"_  Shampoo screamed in her native Tuhua.  _"What is going on? Why are you here? Why is this random Japanese girl so strong? Why is she calling you Aiko!?"_

Ranma groaned, thankfully Akane didn't understand a word of that.  _"It's a long story, Shampoo. Can you stop this before one of you gets hurt? Mousse is long gone so there's no reason to fight."_

"Stupid girl get in Shampoo's way." Shampoo muttered.

"Did you expect me to just stand there and let you swing a sword at someone!" Akane said.

"You throw bomb at Shampoo!"

"It's not really a bomb!"

_"Please Shampoo?"_  Ranma asked,  _"I'm worried about this too. I've never seen you mad at anyone like that."_

Seeing Ranma ask, even if she was in a dress and going by some alias for some reason, made Shampoo's resolve deflate slightly. "Fine…"

"Good." Ranma jumped down to Shampoo, offering her a hand.

Shampoo smiled, taking the offer for assistance. As the two got out of the crater, Ranma spoke up, "Uh, Akane? Are we going to be in trouble for, uh, the damage?"

Akane shrugged apathetically. "I doubt it. The Principal did way more damage last year during Finals Week."

Shampoo blinked,  _"Did I hear that right? I don't think Headmasters are supposed to cause damage to schools."_

Ranma shrugged in response,  _"Don't ask me. I've never met the guy."_

"What exactly are you two saying? It doesn't sound like Chinese." Akane asked.

"It's the dialect spoken in Shampoo and Mousse's village." Ranma explained, "Living there two years we kind of picked it up."

Akane nodded in understanding, "Yeah I guess… crap! I was supposed to be home by now! I have to start getting dinner ready!" She started running out of the grounds, "See you later tonight Aiko!"

Then Akane was gone, the remaining students filed out, leaving Ranma and Shampoo alone.

"Aiko?" Shampoo asked, eyebrow raised.

"Can… can that wait until later? I'll take you to my house."

* * *

Akane was now in a rush. She had been so distracted by the fight that she hadn't realized she was late!

If she didn't show up soon, Kasmui would arrive. And while Akane wanted her help, she knew her elder sister would quietly take over the kitchen again if Akane left an opening. So Akane ran. She ran fast enough that when a Chinese guy in white robes jumped in front of her, Akane didn't have time to stop.

"Owww…" Mousse groaned.

"Crap! Sorry!" Akane said, untangling herself from him. "Mousse, right?"

"Yes.." Mousse did his best to recover his dignity, "Thank you for your assistance, Miss Tendo."

"Oh. It wasn't any trouble. I couldn't just stand there, you weren't even fighting back." Akane said.

"I can't fight against her…" Mousse admitted, "Still, are you alright? You're not hurt or anything?"

Akane shook her head, "No. I'm fine."

"Really? Shampoo's one of the best fighters I know… she's definitely the best in our village. The only one around her age I know who's better than her is Saotome…" Tears began to stream down his face, "Why! She's so perfect! Why has fate cursed her!"

"Uh… she was trying to kill you."

"That's not her fault." Mousse said.

"Uh… she was the one swinging the sword." Akane said.

"Well.. you see.. she miiiighht feel honor bound by the insult I gave her to kill me." Mousse admitted, sheepishly.

There was a pause. Akane stared at Mousse, "What? What?! Why? What the hell did you do?!" Akane shook her head, "Never mind! I have to get home!"

"I could explain as we walk?" Mousse suggested.

"Fine!" Akane started walking again, "So what's this about."

"Well, first.. it's just awful! The worst possible thing that can happen!" Mousse paused, seemingly for dramatic effect, "Shampoo's getting married!"

Akane froze, mid-step. She stared at Mousse, "How… how is that a problem? I mean, she looks a little young. to be getting married but."

"You don't understand!" Mousse sobbed, "Shampoo has no choice!" He folded his arms, even as he walked. Nodding dramatically. "Yes. I guess I'll have to explain some facts about our home." He gathered his thoughts, and began to explain. "You see, the name of our Village is translated as 'Tribe of Women Heroes.' And it is, in fact, famous for its women warriors. "

"Wow, no wonder Aiko went there." Akane said.

"...riiight. Anyways. You see, one of the things that makes the village strong is their pride. The pride of one of the warriors is unbendable. As such, there are rules that the warrior must follow if she's beaten."

Mousse took a deep breath, "Now, these laws are pretty archaic. The one involving being beaten by a woman hasn't been applied in I think decades."

"What is it?"

"If a woman beats a warrior of the village, she is perfectly in her right to give the Kiss of Death, an oath to chase the target to the ends of the earth and kill her." Mousse coughed nervously, "Like I said, nobody does that any more… but the other half. What happens if a man beats her, that people still follow."

"And that is…?"

"If… if a man beats her… she has to marry him!" Mousse screamed out the injustice. Several people stared at him.

"That's.. that's real!?" Akane felt a lump build up in her gut. Those stupid boys, who had harassed her every day for nearly a month now. If some other boy, "If.. what if it's a fluke?" She asked.

"A warrior is prepared for any eventuality. Even accidents count." Mousse gritted his teeth. "Stupid… stupid accident! If I had just been faster… if I had kept my cool better… if I had killed that stupid perverted wolf boy…" He began mumbling a rant.

"She's stuck with some pervert!" Akane screamed, "That… that poor girl!"

Mousse snapped out of his rage, "That's right! Shampoo's trapped! I needed to find a way to stop this joke of a wedding!"

"What can you do?" Akane asked breathlessly.

"There are outs in these laws, of course." Mousse explained. "If a warrior opposes the marriage, then her brother or sister can challenge the one who defeated her. If they win, then the engagement is canceled. However, well, Shampoo's an only child."

"So she can't-"

"No! There's another out. Saotome's trained with Shampoo, fought alongside Shampoo. The two studied under the same Masters." Mousse raised up a finger, grinning. "So, Saotome can serve as a proxy for a sibling! That's why I was there. Saotome can beat that idiot, no problem. So Shampoo will be free!"

Akane grabbed Mousse's outstretched hand with her own. "That's perfect!"

"It.. is?"

"Yes!" Akane said, grinning wildly, "You see, Aiko's coming over to my house for dinner tonight. You can explain things to her then, and she can save Shampoo from that pervert!"

Hope dawned in Mousse's glasses. "That's… that's perfect!"

Akane paused, "Though, uh, I don't see what any of this has to do with her wanting to kill you."

"Oh. That." Mousse winced. "Well…" he reached into his robes, and pulled out two small pairs of golden bells. "These are, well, a family heirloom." Mousse admitted, "They've been passed down from Mother to Daughter in Shampoo's family for generations. It's a tradition in my village to always get married bearing a treasure of your ancestors. And this, well, this was Shampoo's. To not follow the tradition brings bad karma, and people generally will postpone the marriage until a suitable treasure can be found." He tucked the bells back into his sleeves.

"So… you took them to stop the wedding?"

"That's right!" Mousse chuckled nervously, "But, uh, it turns out that stealing such a treasure is also such a grave insult to Shampoo's family that she wants to kill me for doing it…"

"Oh."

"But, you know, I'm sure that once Shampoo's set free she'll forgive me! I'll return the treasure and everything will go back to normal…" Mousse said, "It's just, you know, a matter of face! She  **has**  to chase me."

Akane gave him her best reassuring smile. "Well, I guess if you say so." Akane picked up the pace, "So come on Mousse, I'll take you to my house. We can start planning on how to save Shampoo there!" She tapped her chin, "Uh, how good are you at cooking?"

"Abysmal." Mousse admitted.

"Darn."


	7. Don't Cry China Boy

Her feet slammed against the ground. She knew she had to hurry.

Her goal was in sight, she stared straight ahead in determination.  
  
Nothing could stand in her way, there it was! She barged into the building. No time to introduce herself, she needed to reach it! Any in the building would have seen a blur, she finally reached her goal!   
  
Then she skidded to a stop, seeing that the last person she had wanted to see was there!   
  
“Oh, Good Afternoon Akane.” Kasumi said, wearing an apron. “Don’t you worry, I got this under control. You just get ready for the Saotome’s, they’ll be over in an hour or so.”   
  
The kitchen having, once again, been stolen from her, Akane fell to her hands and knees in defeat.

  
**Part 7: Don’t Cry China Boy**

 

“So this Ranma’s house?” Shampoo asked. The two were standing in front of the Saotome residence. “Old home in Nǚjiézú bigger.”  
  
Ranma rolled her eyes, “Well, you know, there’s a lot more space out there then Tokyo. Plus this isn’t even a crowded part of the city. I could be living in a tiny apartment.”   
  
Shampoo made a face, “Have cousin who live in Beijing. Too too crowded when Shampoo last visited.”

  
Ranma opened the door, “Hey, I’m home!”   
  
Nodoka was there in a minute, “Oh welcome back Ra- Shampoo?”   
  
“Nihao Mrs. Saotome!” Shampoo waved and gave a bright smile. An instant later Nodoka grabbed her and gave a very tight hug.   
  
“It’s so nice to see you again.” Nodoka said, “Come in dear. Oh this is great! Genma! Guess who showed up?”

Genma peered out of his room, “What’s going on?”  
  
“Nihao Pops!” Shampoo said cheerfully.   
  
Genma’s eye twitched. Back when Shampoo had first started learning the Saotome School, she didn’t know much Japanese at all. When studying under Cologne she didn’t refer to her as her Great-Grandmother, but rather as “Teacher.”  Thinking that this was the same for Ranma, she had assumed that “Pops” was what you called your teacher in Japanese. Even after learning otherwise it stuck. “Well it’s good to see you again Shampoo. You haven’t been slacking off right?”   
  
“Never!” Shampoo said, grinning.

  
Genma grunted, “Good. Didn’t want to waste time on you.”   
  
“Come sit down, I you have to tell us what you’ve been up to.” Nodoka had pulled out the tea set, setting it down on the table in the living room.

Soon enough the Saotomes were gathered around the table. Nodoka poured everyone gathered a cup of tea, Ranma poured hot water on himself.  
  
Shampoo looked around, bouncing in a bit of excitement.   
  
“So, how have you been dear?” Nodoka asked.

  
“Shampoo getting married!”

  
‘What?” Ranma asked, “Seriously?”   
  
“Aren’t you a little young for that? You’re only nineteen.” Nodoka said, frowning.

Shampoo shrugged, “Technically Shampoo not have to get married right away. But want to get it done.” She clenched her fists at recalling the reason she **wasn’t** married.

  
“Wait, is there a reason you have to get married?” Nodoka asked.

“Well…”  
  
The realization clicked in Ranma’s eyes. “Wait, is this about that law? Where if a guy beats you you gotta marry him?”

Shampoo nodded.  
  
Ranma’s eyes narrowed, “Who? Do I know the guy?”   
  
“It Mint, remember him?” Shampoo asked.

  
Nodoka frowned, “Mint? Oh! Him. That young man that was with the larger youth that accosted me back then… Lime, right?”   
  
Ranma nodded, scowling. “The hell was he doing back there?”   
  
Shampoo smiled, “Well, Shampoo can tell story of how it happened.”

* * *

Nabiki Tendo stepped into the house. It was nice to be back for the weekend. It had been a while since she had seen her sisters and dad. College life was fun, but getting to have Kasumi’s cooking again was going to be the highlight of the weekend.  Plus, it would be good to hear about the gossip at Furinkan straight from the biggest source of it, her dear little sister.

Stepping into the living room,  she saw Akane talking with a handsome looking guy. Even the thick glasses on his face didn’t distract from that cute face.  
  
“Well hello there Akane.” Nabiki sat down next to her sister, looking across to the new guy. “Well, I can tell you what, you definitely won on the rebound.”  She gave him a flirty smirk.   
  
“N-Nabiki!” Akane stammered. “What?”   
  
“E-Excuse me?” He said.

  
Nabiki laughed, “Well, you bring home a hunky new guy to a family dinner, right?”   
  
The guy blushed, “It’s… it’s not like that Miss. Akane is assisting me, we just met today.”

  
Nabiki grinned, “So that means you’re single?”   
  
“There’s a girl he likes Nabiki, that’s why he’s here.” Akane said dryly. “Mousse, meet my other older sister, Nabiki. Never ask for anything from her without a couple hundred yen.”   
  
“You wound me Sis.” Nabiki said. “So what’s the story behind this guy then?”   
  
Akane launched into an explanation of Mousse’s circumstances. Nabiki noticed the flash of panic once Akane got to the part about this Shampoo girl “marrying some pervert.”   
  
“Once Aiko comes over we’ll fix things up quickly.” Akane said, finishing the story.   
  
“That’s… that’s really weird.” Nabiki said. A tribe of crazy warrior women? “So how tough is this Shampoo girl anyways.”   
  
Akane let out a grin, “She was pretty good. She was making pull out some of the tougher techniques by the end.”   
  
“Wow, high praise.” Nabiki said. “So this other guy is tougher? Think your new friend can take him?”

  
Mousse coughed at that, “Well, uh, not quite. Ordinarily Shampoo would have won, but circumstances…”   
  
Akane frowned, “You said accidental defeats count, right? So what’s the story behind that?”   
  
“I suppose I should start with when the three showed back up…” Mousse muttered.

* * *

 

When word got out that Herb was going to be visiting again, the people of Nǚjiézú reacted as expected of an ancient and powerful tribe expected.

  
Namely, they dragged the two members of the village who caused so much trouble the last time he showed up, and made sure they knew exactly what would happen if they caused trouble again.

  
Shampoo’s protests that “they started it!” fell on deaf ears. Prince Herb had come to Nǚjiézú for help. He got beaten up and had a mountain dropped on him. That sort of lack of hospitality could lead to trouble, especially if it meant handsome wandering martial artists no longer came to the village to marry their daughters for fear of mountain drops.

So, naturally, Shampoo and Mousse were the ones who were going to greet him and his two followers.  
  
Wrapped in cloaks, the three Musk travelers arrived in Nǚjiézú with little fanfare. However, the leader of the three stopped upon noticing Shampoo and Mousse. Herb let out a little smirk, lowering his hood. “Well, hello again.”   
  
Shampoo, actually facing Herb, bowed towards him. (Mousse bowed at a tree.) “Welcome to Nǚjiézú, Prince Herb.”   
  
Herb nodded, returning a much smaller bow. “Thank you, Madam.”   
  
“Lime! It’s her! The woman who touched you!” The smaller of Herb’s two companions, Mint, whispered.

“Wow, it is. She’s as pretty as ever.” The larger one, Lime, whispered back. “I wonder if I could get her to touch me again.”  
  
“Maybe you’ll be able to touch her breasts this time!”   
  
“Wow I bet that’d be a lot less painful.” Lime said, as the last time Shampoo had “touched” him it had been from her punching him in the face repeatedly until he was knocked unconscious

That’s when Herb turned around and shot a burst of ki at the two, knocking them into the air. “Can you two not embarrass me for **five minutes!?”**  He turned back to Shampoo, “Forgive my subordinates rudeness. They are as… as…”   
  
“Stupid? Shampoo suggested.

  
“Yes. Stupid as ever.” Herb muttered.

  
Gravity took over, and Mint fell down from the air, landing on top of a small bench set up by one of the houses at the entrance of the village. This bench had a bucket of water on it. Mint landing knocked the bucket into the air. Sailing through the sky, it landed right on top of Herb’s head, drenching him with cold water.

Then Lime landed next to Herb. “Your Majesty! You became a woman again!”

  
Shampoo sighed, “Well, then, I’ll go check up on your other subordinate.”   
  
Herb pulled the bucket off her head. “Wait, where’s Saotome?”

“Ranma?” Shampoo said, “He and his family went back to Japan three weeks ago.”

* * *

 

“Herb very disappointed when learn you gone Ranma.” Shampoo threw in.

  
Ranma scowled. “Great. You didn’t tell him where I was, right? Last thing I want is that guy blowing up my house to find me for revenge or something.”

Shampoo shook her head, laughing, “Herb not seem mad. Just want to see you again.” Here a sly grin sprouted, “Maybe he want to make babies with girl-type? Musk no have problem with that.”  
  
“Gacck! Don’t even joke about that Shampoo!” Ranma shouted.

* * *

Mint had landed headfirst, he was still upside down when Shampoo went over to check on him. “Are you OK?”

  
Mint peered up, still upside down, at Shampoo. “Wow! Women’s underwear sure is different than mine!”  
  
Shampoo kicked him in the face. “Don’t look up women’s dresses!” 

Mint righted himself. “Huh? Why?”  
  
“It’s rude!” Shampoo said.

Mint blinked. “Why?”  
  
Shampoo pressed her forehead into her hand, she could feel the headache coming on. “Would you like if if Lime suddenly started grabbing you and staring at you?”

Mint frowned, “No….”  
  
“When what makes you think a woman would like it?”

“Uhh… women are different?” Mint suggested.

“We’re not that different.” Shampoo said, “Is Herb any different when his curse makes him a woman?”  
  
“He gets breasts!” Mint said excitedly.

  
There it was. That splitting, unbearable pain from the back of her head. “Does he act any different?”   
  
“...nooo…” Mint admitted. “But…. but I want to touch them!” He whined.   
  
“You can’t just touch a woman out of the blue!” Shampoo snapped, “If you’re interested in a girl, you need to ask her out on a date, get to know her, see if a relationship works! Then you can touch her if she says you can!”   
  
Mint froze, and took in that information. He then reached out and grabbed Shampoo’s hands. “Oh! In that case can I go on a date with you?”   
  
“Eh?” Shampoo said.

  
“Uh, you know, whatever a dat-” Mint didn’t get to finish that sentence, as he had to dodge a dozen spears thrown at him.   
  
“How dare you…” Mousse growled.

  
Shampoo groaned, “Wonderful. Now he puts on his glasses.”

“Huh? I was asking her out a date! She suggest-” Mint jumped over the spinning axe.

  
“Stay away from Shampoo you pervert!” Mousse shouted, swords and chains flying out of his robes.

Mint drew his swords, deflecting the dozens of weapons tossed at him. “Hah! I won’t lose to you this time!”   
  
The two fighters bounced around the village entrance, weapons flying everywhere, while Shampoo and Herb gazed on in horror.

“Uh…” Lime looked over to Shampoo, “Does that mean that we’re going to fight again?” Then a big smile formed on his face, “Oh! does that mean Your Majesty is going to fight the short girl with the **really** big-”  Shampoo and Herb punched him in the head simultaneously.

“What’s your problem!” Mint shouted.  
  
“My problem is that you were coming on to Shampoo!” Mousse shouted back.

  
“Is she your girlfriend?” Mint asked, ducking under a giant flail hurled at him.

  
“Th-that doesn’t matter!” Mousse threw out several chains, trying to wrap Mint up. “I won’t let you harass her!” Mint dodged the chains, but was hit by a large mallet in the gut. He was sent flying and impacted one of the nearby houses.  “Take that! Now remember to leave-”   
  
Shampoo punched Mousse in the head, sending him into the dirt. “Mousse you idiot! Why the hell are you embarrassing me like this!?”

“B-but Shampoo! He was-” Mousse began.

“He was being stupid, yes! I know. But I could handle it!”  
  
“He… he asked you-”   
  
Shampoo’s eye twitched, “Yes Mousse. He asked me on a date.”   
  
Mint, meanwhile pulled himself up, groaning in pain. “Oww…”  He glared at Mousse, remembering the last time he had lost to him. “I can’t…” he picked up the mallet, “lose this time… not when a girl actually spoke to me!” He threw the mallet, aimed straight at Mousse’s head. Unfortunately, there was another head in the path to Mousse’s.   
  
Shampoo, meanwhile, was continuing to berate her childhood friend and teenage annoyance. “In fact, I think I’ll say yes!” She jabbed her finger into Mousse’s chest, “Because, Mousse-”   
  
“Shampoo!” Mousse saw the flying mallet and pointed behind her. Shampoo just grabbed his hand and pulled it down hard.   
  
“Don’t interrupt me! It’s none of your business who I date!”  Shampoo said, “I am sick of your constant harassment of any boy who has ever so much as **talked** to me! God, you wouldn’t stop attacking Ranma for a half a year!”   
  
“There’s-”   
  
“And before that, remember Jan Sung? That nice boy? He was cute! But noooo you had to scare him off and now he’s in Taiwan!”   
  
“Shampoo behind you!” Mousse shouted.   
  
“What’s behind me!?” Shampoo turned around, “If this is some cheap trick to turn me around so you can run I swear I’ll-” She turned around, just in time for the mallet to be within range of her face. “Oh.”   
  
Impact occurred.   


* * *

“And… and that’s how it happened.” Mousse finished his tragic story.  
  
Akane frowned, “That… um…”   
  
“So let me get this straight.” Nabiki said, “The guy shows up, he hits on this Shampoo chick. You then attack the guy out of the blue, and she gets hit as collateral.”   


“Uh… when you put it that way…” Mousse said sheepishly.

  
“Nabiki! He was...  um… just trying to help her from that pervert!” Akane had to admit, when Nabiki put it that way it sounded bad. “But come on! Having to marry him because of that! It’s awful!”

Mousse nodded, “Exactly! I have to save Shampoo!”

“So how exactly are you planning to do that?” Nabiki asked.

Akane and Mousse erupted into the explanation of the loophole that Aiko would soon be filling.

  
“OK… and you sure your friend can beat this guy?” Nabiki asked.

  
Mousse snorted, “Shampoo only lost to him by a fluke in the first place. Saotome will crush him.”

Nabiki frowned, the entire thing just seemed too neat and tidy, “You sure there isn’t any complication involved? Some other loophole that can ruin your plans?”

Mousse shook his head confidently. “Nope! The law is quite clear on this. A sibling or proxy can challenge the prospective groom to annul the engagement.”  
  
With a shrug Nabiki stood up, “Well good luck,”

* * *

 Shampoo groaned as consciousness forced itself back into her mind. It had just been a moment, but as any trained fighter knew, even a moment of being knocked out was enough to count as a defeat.  Mousse and Mint were both looking down at her with concern.   
  
“Are you alright Shampoo?” Mousse asked.

  
“I’m fine.” Shampoo grumbled, she glared at Mousse, “You… do you know what you just did!?” She hissed at him.

“N-no…” Mousse recoiled from her glare, “I’m sorry you got caught up in-”  
  
“Yes I got caught up in another stupid fight you started for no reason Mousse!”  Shampoo shouted. She stood up, brushing the dirt off her clothing. She turned to Mint, who instantly recoiled.

  
“I’m sorry I’m sorry!” he bowed repeatedly.

  
“What is going on here!?” Cologne hopped into the scene on her staff. Weapons and chains scattered everywhere, more than a few villagers had been taking bets.

“Uh… hello Great-Grandmother…”  
  
Cologne looked between the contrite Mousse and Mint, the unconscious Lime, the amused yet female Herb, and finally Shampoo.

  
“He started it!” Mint and Mousse said simultaneously.

  
Cologne sighed, “Shampoo, what happened? You were asked to **say hello** to them.”

  
Shampoo frowned, “Well…” She looked around, examined Mint. She realized that, if she said nothing, then life would go on as if this knock out never happened. It was so accidental that none of the people who had been watching would be bothered by her not telling her Great Grandmother.  “You see… um…”   
  
Mint wasn’t bad looking, Shampoo thought he was kind of cute. A lot of his more… annoying traits, namely his utter stupidity around women, could probably be hammered out of him with exposure and time. After all, Herb wasn’t an utter moron and he was a Musk.

 _And if it turns out badly, I can just write to Ranma._ Shampoo nodded, “Well, Mousse started attacking Mint after he asked me out on a date.” She rubbed her head, it still hurt. “I intervened to stop it…” She looked over at Mint, he was confused while Mousse was turning a pale green. “And Mint knocked me out in the crossfire.”   
  
The crowd gasped.

  
“I see… so you’re sure you lost to him?” Cologne said, ignoring Mousses increasingly loud shouts of _“No!”_

“Yes.”

“Well then.” Colonge said to her heir and prized student. “I suppose we shall have to write to the family and arrange things.” She glanced at Mint, looking him up and down. “Well, not bad, could do worse Shampoo.”  
  
“Huh…?” Mint blinked, “Uh, what happened?”   
  
Herb smirked, “Congratulations Mint, you found yourself a fiancee.”

* * *

Shampoo noticed that as she finished the story, Ranma’s fists were clenched.

  
“So that stupid little…” He looked up at Shampoo. She saw concern and anger in his eyes. Nothing else. “Is there any way you can get out of it!?”

  
“Yes, well...” Shampoo explained the way out of this particular obligation, should she want it.   
  
Ranma instantly stood up, “Sorry Mom, Pops, I’ll have to be making a trip back to China.”   
  
“No!” Shampoo grabbed his arms. “Ranma, don’t.”   
  
“Huh?” Ranma’s face snapped to confusion, “But Shampoo! You’re being forced to-”   
  
“Shampoo not being forced!” She shouted.

  
“What? But he…”   
  
Shampoo shook her head, “Ranma, can we talk private?”   
  
Ranma frowned, glancing back to his mother, her expression concerned. “Sure…” he said.

* * *

“So this is your room?” Shampoo said, switching back to her native tongue once they were alone. Genma was the one who always insisted she speak Japanese in the Saotome home, after all.  Ranma’s room wasn’t very large. There was a futon in the corner, a desk with some books on it, and a closet.

“Yeah.”  
  
Shampoo smiled, “It’s nice.” She sat down on the futon next to him.   
  
“So… what’s up with this? Why the hell are you going along with it?”   
  
“Why are you so worried about it?” Shampoo asked.   
  
“Of course I am! That law is stupid!” Ranma snapped. “Marrying some random guy because he beat you in a fight? Come on! That’s stone age crap!” He was upset, and worried about her. Anger and concern were all that Shampoo could see.

“Ranma. I’m **fine.** I’ve been _engaged._ I’m getting married now because I want to.” Shampoo shook her head, smiling. “I glad you’re worried about me. But if I really didn’t want it, I could have gotten out of it at any time.” Her smile became sly, “Unless you think that Mint is too much for you?”

“Seriously? I could kick that scrawny puppy’s butt in my sleep!” Ranma said, “No trouble at all!”  
  
Shampoo laughed, “Good to hear. So you get that I’m fine with this?”

Ranma slumped over in defeat. “Yeah, I get it.”

“So then… tell me about Akane.” Shampoo asked.

“Akane?” Ranma looked up, “Man that’s, uh… complicated.”

“Try me.”

Ranma scratched the back of his head. “Well, it’s like… man. Remember the entire reason I was there? Back at Nǚjiézú?”  
  
“Mr. Saotome would teach me his style and in return your family got a home, you got training from Great-Grandmother, and a lead for a cure to your Jusenkyo curse.” Shampoo said.

 “Yeah, I got one alright. Akane’s the key to that.”  
  
“...and how does pretending to be a women help with that?”

  
“That’s a bit complicated.” Ranma said, and then explained the basics of why “Aiko” had come into being, “So since I needed to get to know her to get my cure, I introduced myself as a girl and am planning on having her get to know ‘me’ later…”   
  
Shampoo tilted her head, “OK. What exactly do you need from her for this?”   
  
Ranma blushed, “She needs to... kiss me… and I’ll be cured.”

  
Shampoo took that in, she noticed the look on Ranma’s face, and a smile sprouted on her face. “Ohhh I see.” Shampoo said, leaning in close. “You need her to want to kiss you for the cure. Buuut I bet you want her to keep kissing you after that!”   
  
“W-what! I never said that!”   
  
Shampoo laughed, “Come on Ranma, I’ve never seen you so nervous about just kissing a girl. You’ve repeatedly **flashed** people to get an edge, and you’re freaking out about a kiss?” Shampoo poked him on the forehead, “It’s so obvious you like her.”

  
Ranma turned away, his face reddening. “Damn it Shampoo…” He muttered.   
  
Shampoo just kept on poking him, “Come on Ranma… I won’t tell anybody.” She cooed into his ear, snickering.

  
“..fine damn it! I like her OK! I don’t know how the hell I’m going to get closer to her when she just knows me as a girl got it?” Ranma snapped.

  
Shampoo smiled as Ranma snapped at her. “More like it. It’s about time you got interested in a girl, honestly with how popular you were I’m shocked you never had a girlfriend.”   
  
Ranma groaned, “Come on Shampoo. I knew I wouldn’t be there forever.”   
  
Shampoo rolled her eyes, “Really? I thought you might want to stay after getting cured. Even if you didn’t think you’d be there forever, what’s wrong with a casual date or two?”

  
“Well what about you?”   
  
Shampoo frowned, “Come on Ranma, I’m engaged now. It’s not like I wasn’t interested in some guys… But Mousse, well, he was difficult at times.”   
  
Ranma laughed, “Yeah he was a bit crazy at first.”

  
Shampoo groaned, “That’s an understatement, I’m still shocked that you managed to make friends with him.

* * *

 

 “And that’s when, to my and Saotome’s shock, Shampoo sprouted cat ears!”  
  
“Really?” Akane asked.

  
“Well yes, he was a cat ghost after all. How else would make her his bride?”   
  
It had started with Akane, realizing that Mousse had known Aiko much longer than she had, asked him if there were any interesting stories he could tell. Mousse had decided to tell the story of the first time the two had worked together to save Shampoo from an unwanted marriage.

  
“So wait, didn’t you say that the only way to get her out was to kiss her before the New Year’s bell finished ringing?” Nabiki asked. “How’d that go, did you kiss her?” A smirk, “Or, perhaps, Saotome did it?”   
  
Mousse blushed, “N-nothing like that, actually.” He admitted, “Uh… me and Saotome managed to break open the cage…”   
  
“And then what?” Kasumi asked.

“Err…” he laughed a bit awkwardly, “Shampoo beat up the ghost and he decided to go find, in his words, a ‘gentler bride’.”

A short pause.  
  
“Well, that’s not quite as romantic as I expected when you first started telling the story.” Tofu said.

“I like it.” Akane said, “Would have been dumb if something as tough as Shampoo really needed someone else to save her in the end.”  
  
Mouse smiled at Akane, “True…” He sighed, “She was always like that. When Saotome showed up she well… she was a little upset at first.”   
  
“Hmm…? Why is that?” Akane asked. But before Mousse could answer, the doorbell rang. “I’ll get it!”  She stood up, heading out to the front door.   
  
Just as expected, the Saotome family was at the front gates.

“Hello Akane.” Nodoka said brightly. Standing beside her was Genma, with Aiko trailing a bit behind with…

“Oh, Shampoo.” Akane said.

“Yeah.. uh… you don’t mind? I mean, she’s staying with me but we couldn’t just leave her alone…”  
  
“No, it’s great. She can come in.” Akane said, “I got a really big table out of the attic so don’t worry about seating, and we have plenty of food.”   
  
Akane noticed that Genma and Aiko perked up at the mention of food, Shampoo quietly chuckling in their direction.  Pleasantries were exchanged and Akane lead the guests into the house.

But then they entered the living room, and it was like the air seemed to freeze up.

“Oh, uh, hi Shampoo.” Mousse said, nervously.

“What he doing here?” Shampoo asked coldly.

“He, uh, told me about what’s going on, how you’re getting engaged against your will.” Akane said.  
  
“Oh Mousse say that?” Shampoo said, her fists clenching.

“Shampoo please-” Aiko began.

“Stay out of this!” Shampoo snapped at her, “This between Shampoo and Mousse.” She took a few deep breaths. “Shampoo no ruin Akane’s hospitality, so no start fight here.” She pointed at Mousse, “Mousse not tell whole story, no? Not tell about how Shampoo not forced? Shampoo end engagement if Shampoo **want.** ”   
  
“Mousse say he love Shampoo, but always think of Mousse first!” Shampoo snapped, “Shampoo… Shampoo loved someone who not loved them back, so Shampoo let it go! No obligation, no promises, no laws held Shampoo. So Shampoo didn’t try! Not like Mousse who ignore rules and feelings!”   
  
Everyone was staring now, Akane looked down, her face flush with embarrassment. But if Shampoo noticed, she didn’t care.   
  
“Wait I mean…” Mousse tried to defend himself.

“I’m not that surprised.” Nabiki said dryly.

Shampoo turned around, “Sorry for ruining gathering.” She muttered, “Shampoo go find food somewhere else.”

* * *

“Mousse, you moron.” Ranma said, sitting down next to her shellshocked friend. 

  
Nodoka was running damage control, apologizing to Kasumi. Soun and Genma were, both being a bit less emotionally sensitive, quickly getting over it and bonding over some sake. Dinner wasn’t quite ready yet, thankfully. Akane had run out after Shampoo.   
  
“Look! I can’t just… Saotome…” Mousse growled, “I can’t let her get stuck in-”   
  
“You can’t what Mousse? Look man, if Shampoo asked me to stop it I would I’d kick Mint’s butt any day of the week! But she told me no, she wants to at least **try.”**   
  
A blade jutted out of Mousse’s sleeve, “You think you know her that well!” He shouted.   
  
Ranma crouched into a fighting stance, “I did spend two years with her, being her goddamn friend yeah!”   
  
“Mousse.” Nodoka suddenly put her hand on his shoulder, “You’re not going to disappoint your mother by starting a fight in someone else’s house, are you?”   
  
Mousse glared at Nodoka for a moment, before the tension left his body and the blade vanished back into his robes, “No Mrs. Saotome.”

  
Nodoka put her hands together, smiling. “Good. Now I’m sure this mess will be resolved soon, right? I’d hate for the nice dinner the Tendos prepared to be ruined.” With those words she headed back to chat with Kasumi and Tofu some more.

  
Ranma glanced over at Mousse again, a smirk forming. “You heard her Mousse, don’t want to disappoint Mom.”

Mousse slumped down against the wall, staring out into the backyard. “Like I haven’t already disappointed everybody. I know I’m a joke.”  
  
Ranma sat down next to Mousse, “Come on man, it’s not that bad. It’s just… I mean, you’ve really been focused on Shampoo as long as I’ve known you.”   
  
Mousse laughed bitterly, pulling out the bells which Ranma recognized as being jewlery Shampoo wore often.  “Loved her since I was a child.” Mousse explained, “You’ve ever been in love, Saotome?”

A flash of laughter and a smile popped into Ranma’s head. “Don’t know.”  
  
“It’s like, half of what I can think about is her. Her smile makes me feel joy just seeing it.”   
  
“You can see people’s smile?” Bop. “Ow!”   
  
“Be serious here Saotome.” Mousse grumbled, lowering his fist. “I just feel this insane need to be with her, to be near her, to hear her talk and laugh and just **be.”**

 Ranma frowned, his mind drifting to Akane, “You know, Mousse, if you really love Shampoo… shouldn’t you want her to be happy? Even if it’s not with **you.** So, you’ve tried to get her to date you, she just doesn't feel the same. She said that herself and all. Which would you rather have, her being your friend, or her hating you?”  


* * *

“There you are.” Akane dropped down from the fence, walking over to the shore of the canal where Shampoo was sitting.  
  
“Why you follow?” Shampoo asked.   
  
Akane sat down next to her, “I wanted to help you, you’re Aiko’s friend after all.”   
  
Something about that made Shampoo laugh, “See why you liked.” She looked back at the water.   
  
“Sorry, Mousse… didn’t tell the whole story.”   
  
“It fine. Stupid Mousse always like that. He always go crazy with Shampoo.” Shampoo said, “You not know.”   
  
“You don’t sound mad anymore.” Akane said hopefully.   
  
“Shampoo just tired of him. Shampoo like someone before Mint. But they no like Shampoo, no matter how hard Shampoo try and get them to like Shampoo.” Shampoo explained, “Realize over them now, so glad for that.”   
  
“So what… So you can marry this guy who beat you by a fluke?” Akane asked.

Shampoo let out a snort. “Not many fighters who can beat Shampoo in fight other than fluke.” She said, “It’s… it’s different. Shampoo raised on romantic stories of strong women meeting strong men and getting stronger together. Many Nǚjiézú girls go to Martial Arts tournaments to try and find dates and husbands.”  
  
“Ah.” Akane said, it suddenly making sense to her. “So, kind of like how a lot of girls here dream of handsome princes?”   
  
Shampoo giggled, “Nǚjiézú girls like princes too.” “So, what, it’s… just a tradition where you live? Guys meet girls by beating them up?”   
  
Shampoo shook her head, “Not like that. Usually they formal challenges. Start of courtship or end.”   
  
Akane clenched her fists, “I just… I met my ex-boyfriend through something like that. He challenged me to a little sparring class, and I said I’d go on a date with him if he won… and he did. But ever since then… there have been guys who keep thinking that if they beat me I’ll date them!”   
  
Shampoo stared at Akane, processing this. “They challenge you often?”   
  
“Every day I go to school.”   
  
“And always lose?”   
  
“All of them. _At once”_ Akane muttered

Shampoo frowned. “In Nǚjiézú is girl gets challenged by weak guy enough then usually village come together and beat up boy until he get point.”  
  
“What about Mousse?” Akane asked.

“Mousse Nǚjiézú. Rules about engagement fights not apply. Also Mousse only beat up boys who he think like Shampoo, which not against rules.” Shampoo pinched her nose. _“Should have known something was up when he stopped picking fights with Ranma.”_   
  
“Huh?” Akane asked, “What was that last sentence?”  
  
“Nothing, just thinking.” Shampoo said back in Japanese.  
  
There was a pause as the two stared at the canal flowing.

“Do you really have to… hurt Mousse though?” Akane asked.

“In Old Days, Mousse’s parents would have been one to put him down. To show that family mean Shampoo’s family no harm.” Shampoo said seriously, “Though… mother dentist and father florist. So Shampoo no know how that would work.”  
  
“Martial Arts Dentistry.” Akane said.   
  
“...Akane joking, right?” Shampoo asked.   
  
“No.”   
  
“World is amazing place.” Shampoo muttered. “Still, if Mousse stop being stupid and give up, which be miracle, then Shampoo accept apology and forget this ever happen.”   
  
“Well, you can’t do that if you don’t come over and have dinner with Aiko. This might be the last time you see her for a while, you know!”   
  
Shampoo sighed, “Yes, see why you liked.” She let out a smile, standing up. “OK, Shampoo see if Mousse convinced.”

* * *

“Back!” Akane declared as she entered the house. “And I brought Shampoo with me.”

“Oh how wonderful, and dinner was just about to start.” Kasumi said.  
  
“Where… Mousse?” Shampoo asked.   
  
“Oh I think he was talking with Aiko out on the veranda.” Kasumi said.   
  
“Thanks.” Akane said, the two stepping past her father laughing at some story Genma was telling.   
  
Sitting out there, staring at the koi pond, was Aiko. All alone.   
  
“Hey.” Akane said, “Err, Kasumi said Mousse was here.”   
  
She turned around, an uneasy smile on her face. “Oh, yeah he was here. Hey Akane, Shampoo.” Aiko looked between the two, “Mousse left. Kasumi gave him a take out-box.” She glanced past them. “...why do you have a bunch of take out boxes anyways?”   
  
Shampoo’s eye twitched. “Stupid Mousse run again?”   
  
Akane sighed, “Sorry Shampoo, I-”   
  
“Oh, he gave me these before he left.” Aiko said, pulling from her pocket two pairs of small bells. “I’ve seen you wear these a lot Shampoo, they’re what he took right?”   
  
Shampoo gawked at it, before holding out her hands and taking the hair ornaments. “Y-yes.”   
  
Aiko glanced away, “Mousse said he’s going back to Nǚjiézú. Going to apologize to Granny and his parents, then go on a training trip.”   
  
Akane caught the implications. Namely, that nobody knew when he’d be returning home.

Yet, Shampoo was smiling. “Stupid Mousse.” She said, expertly tying up a pair of buns, letting the bells hang from the bangs now framing her face.  
  
“Dinner’s ready.” Kasumi announced.   
  
Aiko immediately perked up, “All right!”   
  
Akane and Shampoo laughed.

* * *

Dinner passed smoothly after that. Nodoka and Kasumi seemed to get along swimmingly. Shampoo and Ranmatelling stories of some of their past adventures. Overall, Akane would judge the gathering as a success.

Finally, after two hours Shampoo stood up, “Shampoo thank for hospitality, but needs to start heading home now.”  
  
“You’re leaving now?” Ranma asked, “But you just got here?”   
  
“Shampoo got treasure back, need to head back.” She said.   
  
“Oh that’s too bad, it was nice seeing you.” Nodoka said. “Be sure to send me some pictures of the wedding.”   
  
“Will do.” Shampoo said.   
  
“I’ll see you out.” Akane and Ranma said simultaneously, both glancing at each other upon the realization of stereo.   
  
A sly smile formed on Shampoo, “That fine, both can take me out.”   
  
They reached the gate, Shampoo stopped and looked up at the night sky.   
  
“It **was** nice meeting you.” Akane said.   
  
“Even if you blew up a couple walls.” Ranma added.

“Sorry.” Shampoo said, a relaxed smile. “Shampoo just glad to see you, and say goodbye. And… and let things go.”  
  
Akane frowned, “Let things go…?”   
  
“What’d you let-” Ranma began to ask, but didn’t get to finish that sentence. Because Shampoo suddenly tackled her, embracing the smaller girl, and **kissing her.**

Akane’s eyes exploded, or at least that’s how it felt. “Whaaaaaaa….!?”  
  
Shampoo pulled away, a broad smile on her face. _“Goodbye Ranma!”_  She said in her native tongue, _“I’m glad we got to meet, even if you never loved me like I did.”_   
  
“L-love!?” Ranma stuttered.   
  
“A-Aiko’s the one y-you…” Akane couldn’t get the image out of her mind, another girl had kissed her. **Another girl.** That was… it was… was there anything wrong with it?   
  
Shampoo just laughed, “Come visit once you get what you need!” She said, before running off into the night.

  
Ranma was stuttering, her mind unable to process what just happened. “She- she liked me…?”   
  
That’s when Mousse jumped out from the shadows and hit Ranma upside the head with a  giant paper fan. **“Of course she liked you you moron!”**   
  
“Mousse!?” Akane said, “You were here the whole time?!”   
  
“Ah, Akane.” Mousse said, turning away from Ranma, manly tears streaming down his face. “I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t face her! I knew for her sake I had to give up on her, but I knew seeing her smiling face would break my will!” He pulled out the now empty take-out box and chopsticks Kasumi had given him, “Plus I couldn’t let this amazing meal get cold.”   
  
“Also you thought it’d make you look cool.” Ranma grumbled, rubbing her head. Mousse hit her with the fan again.   
  
“Seriously Saotome, everybody in China knew Shampoo had a crush on you.” Mousse grumbled.   
  
“And.. nobody had an issue with that.” Akane muttered.

“No, not really. Shampoo’s parents were halfway convinced Saotome would become an in-law.” Mousse said.

“They were!?” Ranma said.   
  
“Well except for the Old Monkey, guess she always knew you were leaving.” Mousse scratched his cheek.   
  
There was a brief pause.   
  
“You’re not going to kiss me, are you?” Ranma finally asked.

“What? No! I’d never ch- err. I’m not over Shampoo yet, and I never was interested in you **that way** Saotome.” Mousse straightened up, “Well, I suppose I should head back now. Farewell Saotome, may our paths cross paths again some day.   
  
Ranma let out half-sigh/half-laugh. “Yeah, see you Mousse.”


End file.
